And I'm back

T

TrumpetGuy

New member
I haven't been here for a while. I have been trying to live a normal life. I have been trying to not worry about how I perceive myself. I have been trying to not scrutinize everything little morsel I eat. I have been trying not to be obsessed with exercising 2 hours a day. But I have slipped. My gain hasn't been huge. Maybe around 15 pounds. But it has been enough to leave me depressed and down in the dumps. It just seems like my body wants to be fat. I just wish I could be like a normal person of a normal body size and not have to worry. But it just doesn't work that way for me.

Time to get back to it.
 
I have somewhat of the same problem. I go through phases where I just eat normally. No binge fests, but enough where I eat enough to actually feel satisfied unlike when I'm dieting. I don't exercise other than a daily brisk walk (instead of jogging and ending up wheezing and miserable). But, of course this isn't enough. I usually say I'll start strictly dieting and exercising the next day. I start off well but the hunger is usually more than I can will myself out of. Luckily my weight has stayed pretty stable. I'm not gaining but I'm still a good 50+ pounds overweight.

But, I guess to actually lose weight we do have to keep track of every damn morsel of food. Seems I can't lose weight if I have the occasional non-diet soda, have a snack, eat til I'm satisfied at meals. It is pretty frustrating as living normally just doesn't cut it.
 
Seems like all three of us are on the same boat. It pisses me off to no end that I have to be ridiculously extra careful about what I eat and how much of it. To quote fellow forum member Joilgirl, "I just look at food and I gain weight." But, we all have to realize we can either just be mad about it or do something. That's a huge part of why I decided enough was e-f'ing-nuff. I want to the get to the point where I don't go into a damn tailspin if I gain 2 lbs. It's just too mentally taxing. Finding this forum was such a blessing for me because it keeps me motivated and there are other people here to remind me the world is not going to end if I gained a couple pounds.

Trumpetguy don't be so down, buddy. Just push that restart button and start fresh. There are a lot of people here to help you through this. You're getting married soon, are you not? That should help with some motivation :)
 
Ando3242 said:
. I don't exercise other than a daily brisk walk (instead of jogging and ending up wheezing and miserable).
Click to expand...
I'd like to suggest that you consider using a treadmill. It's a great way to burn weight, because you can the full distance uphill, and even a slight angle will make a big difference in the calories you burn. I also like using a treadmill because it gives you data that can use to improve your workouts, such as time, speed, angle, etc.
 
Thanks for the motivating words Daybehavior.

I am indeed getting married. My fiance is amazing and I am so lucky she is in my life and she loves me no matter what. I guess sometimes it is easy to get down on myself and lose sight of that.

I guess should give a little more background to my "slip up" I lost a lot of weight over the last year plus. I was happy with my body for once. I was satisfied with myself around the 185-190 range (I am 6'5). But I have slowly just lost control and got to 205. Which I guess can still be considered a healthy weight. The average person on the street would look at me and not consider me fat at all.

The problem I have is that I worked so hard to get where I was. I made myself a little promise that I would never go over 200 again. I do have belly fat again and just the sight of it depresses me to no end. I can carry my weight fairly well since I am tall and big framed so it is hardly noticeable. The problem is that I know it is there.

Right now I am just trying to reset, make some goals for myself again and do my best. But again it all comes down to that I wish I didn't have to feel this way. It is a mental battle that ebbs and flows and I have just been on the losing side for the past few months.

Sorry if that is more details than anyone wants to read. It is therapeutic to open up my thoughts and feelings to a group that can understand where I am coming from.
 
Update:

Feeling better. I was really careful all last week with what I ate. I walked to work every day, walked the dog every day. Which isn't easy since it is 20 degrees here with snow. Some Christmas cookies were brought out at the in laws house yesterday and I had a few. Well more than a few but I didn't beat myself up over it.

Pants are a little bit looser this week. Its amazing how uplifting a week can be if you really focus and crack down. Hope to keep the trend going this week.

Thanks for the encouraging words.
 
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