Am I ACTUALLY Obese? (Pics)

[Llama]

Baby steps, Emm. If you´ve been gaining weight up until now just maintaining is a great start. If you´re sore after walking 3000 steps now then just going from 1000 to 2000 a day on average is progress. Start small and see how it goes. Also: feel free to keep posting here about how the changes feel. Nine times out of ten people here will know what you mean so they can help you celebrate the high and commiserate with the lows when real life contacts are tired of listening about the fun and trials of food and exercise.

 

[Emm2]

Baby steps, Emm. If you´ve been gaining weight up until now just maintaining is a great start. If you´re sore after walking 3000 steps now then just going from 1000 to 2000 a day on average is progress. Start small and see how it goes. Also: feel free to keep posting here about how the changes feel. Nine times out of ten people here will know what you mean so they can help you celebrate the high and commiserate with the lows when real life contacts are tired of listening about the fun and trials of food and exercise.

Thank you!! When I made this post I honestly wasn’t ready to be told I’m obese That word made me feel so offended at first but you guys have been very nice about it and made me feel like I can actually lose weight. I’ve never tried to lose weight before and I feel quite overwhelmed and I’m gonna need a lot of support!!

Yes I’ve gained a few pounds every year. I typically put on weight every winter. I’ve gone up 3 dress sizes since high school and most of the clothes I own, don’t fit lol. But I love shopping and I buy new clothes almost every week so it was never really a problem. The weight gain has been so gradual that I never really thought “oh no I’m obese” at any point because I carry it pretty well don’t LOOK really fat (I think?). I definitely feel like I look average. So “obese” makes me feel... ugh... I just feel bad that I let my self get to this point but it happened so gradually I really couldn’t ever tell. Anyway I hope I can turn it around because it’s really not a good feeling to hear that your body is “obese.” I am looking in the mirror a lot now and I’m feeling so down about my belly area. I’ve packed on an ungodly amount of fat around my midsection, I can feel all the flab on my tummy and sides and back Ugh I just feel awful that I let my self get like this

 

[Err2]

Try not to obsess over the things that make you feel bad, just focus on the smaller more manageable goals that you'll be hitting along your path to greater health (like the feeling of accomplishment you'll get when you first hit 4,000 steps). 7500 is the longer term goal, but you should celebrate the milestones akong the way.

This is when I first got my fitbit and started measuring steps - about 5 months after I started my weight loss journey:


It took me a month to build up to 10,000 - and even then I didn't hit it every day:


Those were long, hard days for me and I had to stop and take a bunch of breaks. Fast forward a few months and I would hit 10,000 steps in about 90 minutes of continous walking so I could do it every day:


Today I'm actually running - something I simply could not fathom in January or May. If I had focused on trying to run, I would have got discouraged at how long it was taking and given up! So aim for a goal that you can do this week - one that will require effort, but that deep down you know you can do.

Work towards it, hit it, and enjoy your accomplishment - you should feel some pride. Your self esteem will start climbing. And then set a new goal for the next week and start working towards it. Baby steps...

 

[Omega]

Work towards it, hit it, and enjoy your accomplishment - you should feel some pride.

Yes!!! Feel pride at what you manage to do. You might feel that it is nothing special compared to what "always been skinny" people talk about - but if its an achievement for you - feel good about it. Then maybe see if you can do it again - or indeed get better - and feel proud about that too.

Making healthy changes is not easy.

 

[MarthaL]

I remember when the dreaded "o" word first showed up on my medical records. It was removed a couple of weeks ago and boy, did that feel good! I walk 1 - 1 1/2 hours a day because my dogs won't let me get out of it. Perhaps one of your neighbors has a dog that would really like to get out with you.

 

[Emm2]

I remember when the dreaded "o" word first showed up on my medical records. It was removed a couple of weeks ago and boy, did that feel good! I walk 1 - 1 1/2 hours a day because my dogs won't let me get out of it. Perhaps one of your neighbors has a dog that would really like to get out with you.

Wow that is so much walking :O

I definitely couldn’t walk for a whole hour! Do you take breaks to sit down? I’ve never walked that long before.

I am trying to walk for 20 minutes but it’s tough! I feel out of breath after a few minutes. I don’t like the feeling of being on my feet for a long time. My legs ache and just wanna sit down so bad so I can feel comfortable again. When I start to feel that, I sit down to take a break but then it’s so hard to get back up. I’m trying for 2,000 steps in a day but I often can’t do 1,000

Then when I see online how many steps other people do...

It’s just because I’m not used to working my body like that... I’m a sedentary girl. I sit on my ass all day for work! I feel exhausted after and want to lie down so the couch is my comfort zone, and laying on my bed. I haven’t been on my feet for a long time in years... I used to walk a bit in the stores but I get everything delivered now, so I’m like totally sedentary... so just getting up and walking for 20 minutes straight feels very uncomfortable

I’m trying but I feel overwhelmed. I’m too tired to walk and I’m too hungry to diet.

I feel overwhelmed, ashamed, scared, and depressed all at once. And it just makes me run to my comfort zone which is snacking to feel better.

I am trying salads but they don’t satisfy me so I just eat more snacks afterwards lol.

My weight is up around 190 pounds (86kg) and 37 inch (93 cm) waist. Everything feels tight. Every time I take a bath I don’t like seeing my body in the mirror because my belly is out of control

Guys I need a lot of help. I wanna get liposuction surgery so they can just take the fat away. I don’t think I’m built for natural weight loss.

 

[Omega]

Stop comparing yourself to other people... In my experience that doesn't work.

You could however compare yourself to the old you... The you of say a week ago... Can you do more steps than you did then? Even if it is 200 more steps it is more... See if you can break your own record. That has to be achievable...

As for filling food - I'm currently making a bowl of porridge with fruit in... That is certainly filling. Try something like that.

 

[alligatorob]

Hey Emm, I looked back and your photos and posts and thought about your obese question. Not sure I have an answer, but I can tell you that you look good to me, a very attractive young woman! On the other hand I can see that you are wise to be thinking about losing weight, I believe it would be good for you. The O word and the weights and measures are just words and metrics to follow your progress to getting healthier, I suggest you don't obsess on them too much. Focus on eating well and getting some exercise and you will be fine.

Don't feel bad about where you are with walking, you are ahead of where I was last year. I could hardly walk at all, on trip up the stairs was a challenge. So I started slow and over a few months got to the point I was hiking for miles in the mountains, and I was a lot fatter, and am a lot older than you! You can easily do better than I, it will just take a while and a little patience. The good thing I found was that even though I could not do a lot at first just trying made me feel better and better about myself. A little instant gratification sure helps.

I suggest you try logging your food and exercise here. Start a diary on the Weight Loss Diary (Weight Loss Diary) page for the logging and to tell us more about yourself and your goals. It should help you with accountability and you will get more attention, advice and support, there.

You can do this!

Oh, and I can see no need for liposuction, but that's a personal decision, do what feels best to you!

 

[Llama]

I´m sorry you´re struggling so much Sadly the only thing that happens when you remain in a calorie surplus after liposuction is that the body fills up the fat cells in other parts of the body (for example when you have liposuction on your belly you´ll start storing more fat on your arms/legs/back) and/or makes new fat cells. Of course you could then have more liposuction, but even if you hypothetically had all the fat cells removed your doctor can possibly get at there´s still the ones between your inner organs. No way to remove those... In other words: you´d get a beer belly. That´d be neither healthy nor pleasant!
I agree with Omega that you should try to focus on improvements, not how you compare to other people. Walking 20 minutes is a great start! And if 20 minutes of walking mean you´re sore all over afterwards: try 10 minutes twice a day. Or just get up and dance along to one song every waking hour you´re not tied to the computer by your job. Anything you hate is hard to do long-term, so don´t overdo it to the point where you hate the changes you make. If you have trouble changing the way you eat all in one go maybe just replace half your portion with that salad, or try eating/chewing more slowly so your brain has time to catch up with your stomach and tell you you´re full. I never liked salads, especially in winter, so I don´t eat them. I do add a handful of leafy green veggies to every sandwich or even handful of crackers I eat: keeps me full much longer.
I also agree with Rob that it would be helpful to keep talking about your trials and frustrations. We want you to feel good and succeed and we WILL try to help you find ways to make this whole get-healthier-thing easier.

 

[MarthaL]

No, I don't take breaks when I walk but then I've walked a lot my whole life. I'd love to be able to run again...maybe my knees can take it now. I know what you mean about wanting to crash after a long day at work. Take that break! You deserve it. Then get up and walk. I keep a food diary. It's on the nightstand, and the last thing I do before going to sleep is write down every single thing I ate during the day. It keeps me on the straight and narrow.

 

[Err2]

Wow that is so much walking :O

I definitely couldn’t walk for a whole hour! Do you take breaks to sit down? I’ve never walked that long before.

I am trying to walk for 20 minutes but it’s tough! I feel out of breath after a few minutes. I don’t like the feeling of being on my feet for a long time. My legs ache and just wanna sit down so bad so I can feel comfortable again. When I start to feel that, I sit down to take a break but then it’s so hard to get back up. I’m trying for 2,000 steps in a day but I often can’t do 1,000

Then when I see online how many steps other people do...

Start at your own pace and focus on being a little bit better today than you were yesterday. I didn't get that fitbit until May, but I started my weight loss journey on Jan 1 so it took 5 months to build up to those occasional 5,000 step days.

When I started it was unpleasant to go 1/4 mile and yes, I did stop and take breaks. Walking a dog really helped - both to motivate me and to hide some of my shame (when I needed to stop and take a break, the dog would stop and sniff around so it looked like maybe I stopped to wait for her to go potty).

I’m too tired to walk

Getting started is a real bear - it is a catch 22 where until you start exercising you often lack energy. But if you're too tired to exercise, where do you get the energy? Summon whatever reserve you have and just push through for about 2 weeks. After that you should start to feel a lot better.

Start super small if you need to - park farther away from work or the store and walk that little bit extra.

I’m too hungry to diet.

You don't need a diet, because even if you were able to successfully diet down to your ideal weight, once you stopped dieting you would just start to gain weight like you're doing now. However you're eating now is unsustainable - you're going to have to make changes forever. I was in such deep denial that this realization was shocking to me, but accepting it is step 1 to your new life.

The good news is that since you don't need "a diet" you don't need to put up with hunger. You'll just need to find foods that you enjoy (or tolerate) that keep you feeling full a long time without too many calories. You don't have to go from 0-100 all at once, just start small - cut out "empty" calories like regular sodas and elaborate coffee or energy drinks. Avoid junk food and, if you do have some, limit yourself to 1 serving.

If you're like me, your feeling of "hunger" often is not hunger - it is something else. If eating celery or carrots or anything else healthy doesn't seem like it'll fill the void - the void is really something that food can't fix. No diet can fix this, you'll have to find ways to address any non-food issues so you aren't transferring your feelings into your stomach...

 

[Emm2]

If you're like me, your feeling of "hunger" often is not hunger - it is something else. If eating celery or carrots or anything else healthy doesn't seem like it'll fill the void - the void is really something that food can't fix. No diet can fix this, you'll have to find ways to address any non-food issues so you aren't transferring your feelings into your stomach...

Thanks for the advice. I will try to go slow and not beat myself up that I can't walk much... but I do feel awful about myself that I'm SO out of shape

I definitely eat my feelings lol... I am very emotional and struggle with anxiety and depression... junk food is my biggest comfort in life and I don't feel like I could even function without it! I am constantly craving junk food even if I'm stuffed after a large meal, I still feel "hungry" for junk food, it just makes me feel good!

 

[Llama]

Err makes great points! I started to find it easier to eat well after I'd been going to therapy for a while to help me deal with my feelings, but everyone is different.

Junk food does do a number on our brains. Nothing in our evolution prepared us for 24/7 availability of superpalatable foods! Weaning yourself off them seems so hard and unfair at first but once you're without them for 7-10 days and your energy starts coming back life is so much better. I'll still have fries and a burger maybe once every two weeks (because they taste good and I don't always feel like cooking, or because I'm on my way back from a hike and want food RIGHT NOW, or because I miscalculated how much food I'd need over the weekend and stores are closed on Sundays here) but I know they'll knock me out for several hours after and won't even keep me as full as a homemade meal with 2/3 the calories.

 

[Emm2]

Err makes great points! I started to find it easier to eat well after I'd been going to therapy for a while to help me deal with my feelings, but everyone is different.

Junk food does do a number on our brains. Nothing in our evolution prepared us for 24/7 availability of superpalatable foods! Weaning yourself off them seems so hard and unfair at first but once you're without them for 7-10 days and your energy starts coming back life is so much better. I'll still have fries and a burger maybe once every two weeks (because they taste good and I don't always feel like cooking, or because I'm on my way back from a hike and want food RIGHT NOW, or because I miscalculated how much food I'd need over the weekend and stores are closed on Sundays here) but I know they'll knock me out for several hours after and won't even keep me as full as a homemade meal with 2/3 the calories.

OMG I have burgers and fries every day :O

Are you saying that’s what’s making me so tired??

I have such little energy. It takes me so long to wake up, then after lunch I feel so sleepy again! I need more coffee to get through the afternoon if I can’t take a nap. I don’t want to cook or wash dishes so I always order fast food. I feel too full after dinner and need to lie down. After a few hours of TV I fall asleep on the couch.

Ugh describing my typical day I sound so lazy but I’m not trying to be, I’m honestly just trying to feel comfortable. I don’t feel like I have enough energy to be up and moving a lot. Even tho I sleep and eat a lot but I’m just not an active kind of person.

 

[Llama]

"Lazy" suggests someone doesn´t want to do things when they easily could; that´s not the same as not doing something when you´re already struggling to stay awake and get through the day.
For me junk food absolutely kills my energy levels. Refined sugar is of course the most notorious example, because it causes your blood sugar levels to spike for a bit (yay sugar euphoria!) and then quickly drop below the level where you´d feel comfortable and awake (even if you´re not diabetic). I don´t know why savory junk food has the same effect on me but it might be because digesting fat is hard work so your body decides to devote most of the fresh blood in circulation to digestion rather than movement or brain power and so your muscles and brain feel underserved. (Not to the point of suffering, thankfully, but to the point of not working pleasantly or efficiently.)

 

[angelbaby88]

not to be mean or anything (i don't mean this badly ok at all <3) but i mean you are def more than just chubby or slightly overweight & you should probs lose those 40lbs unless you feel good at the weight you are rn. i wouldn't say you look obese either though, that's a little stretch lol.

btw just so you know your perception of your size or how other people look depends a lot on your weight & how people look around you. people who are overweight see themselves as skinnier than what they are and will see people as thinner than they are too esp if you see a lot of overweight people. it's a weird thing ik.

 

[MarthaL]

Frankly, if we want to feel better and lose weight we need to stop eating the Junk food (sugar). There's no magic potion. Hamburgers have tons of sugar in them. Around 75-80% of the items in the supermarket have sugar in them. Manufacturers use lots of different names for sugar so we won't know the item has sugar unless we educate ourselves. Some brands even added sugar to canned vegetables! Sugar has been linked with a huge variety of health issues, including metabolic diseases, anxiety and depression, and it is an addictive toxin. Studies have shown sugar to be more addictive than cocaine. One study showed cocaine addicted rats preferred sugar to cocaine. I'm treating my diet the same as any other addiction. If I was addicted to heroin, cigarettes or alcohol I wouldn't expect to be able to jump off the wagon every week or two and still consider myself a recovering addict. I soon wouldn't be! Same, for me, with sugar. I suspect it's an important reason why many diets fail.
Obesity is defined by the Center for Disease Control (CDC) as having a body mass index (bmi) of 30 or more. It's an imperfect measure because it doesn't differentiate between muscle and fat, and muscle weighs more than fat. So, musclular people have a higher bmi. Your bmi is 31.8, so you're just over. If you lost just ten pounds you would be right on 30. I bet you could do that.

 

[Llama]

Studies have shown sugar to be more addictive than cocaine. One study showed cocaine addicted rats preferred sugar to cocaine.

That´s only a half-truth. Cocaine capitalizes on the same reward pathways as sugar, but much more intensely so. The sugar/cocaine thing with the rats was only true after they had been starved - in which case going for something with energy in it makes sense. Non-starved rats did not go for the sugar. Sugar is still crappy for you, of course. Also: where I live hamburger patties normally don´t have sugar in them. The buns and the sauces usually do though.

 

[overlandflyer]

.... Hamburgers have tons of sugar in them. ...

i would not put it past restaurant chefs to spike even a bit of sugar into their ground meat, so only speaking for my own burgers, this isn't really true. ground beef is fat and protein. add a bun and you're going to get some (not a ton) of sugar, but that's the penalty of most bread. i consider my diet very low sugar and burgers are on the menu quite often (at times).

 

[Emm2]

you are def more than just chubby or slightly overweight & you should probs lose those 40lbs unless you feel good at the weight you are rn.

I'm sorry but FORTY pounds? I can't possibly be that overweight. I feel like I look pretty average.