crazedmamaof3
New member
Hi everyone! It's a start of a new year and a start of a new ME! My name is Dea (pronounced "Dee) and Im 29 years old. I have been overweight pretty much since I was 5 years old! My mom is big and her mom was big..it just ran in the family! I've always been the fat girl in school that was made fun of or never had a date. I was always the fat friend that the guys came to to ask if my other thinner friends liked them!...Ofcourse, Ive tried and tried many times, but always lost the motivation after awhile. About 5 years ago I did lose about 45lbs on my own and then met my husband. ..Then had 3 children, lol!...I've suffered through depression most of my life due to my weight, feeling ugly and having no self-confidence. At the end of July this year my husband and I separated. It has been a very hard road for me and I've realized that some of my marital problems stemmed from my insecurities! My husband loves me at any size and was always telling me how beautiful I was but I never believed it! I finally decided to do something to change my outlook on life. I started going to counseling a few months ago and have been put on an anti-depressant which has helped a lot! I'm doing self-affirmations and trying to learn to love myself and my life! I decided that one of the biggest things holding me back from truely loving myself is my weight and it's time to really change it so that I can love myself on the inside and out and today is the perfect day to start this brand new year off. 2006 has been such a horrible year for me but I truely feel that 2007 is going to be a lot better! My husband and I are trying to work things out and the best thing I can do for our marriage is be able to love myself, but I feel like i will never love myself being this size! I have my mother as my weight loss partner and she is a good motivation for me because she is in worse health than I am so I want to help her and be a good role model for her! I also want to be a good role model for my childen and be healthy for them so that I can see them grow up! ..Sorry I wrote a novel here. I've been lurking around the forum for a few days now and there is sooo much info here! I cant wait to get to know some of you! I work 2 jobs from home and dont have much free time between my kids and my jobs, but I will stop by whenever I can!