A Mommy Diary

babyjameshood

babyjameshood

New member
Hello Everyone,

My name is Wendy, I'm 25 years old and a mother of 2 wonderful boys. I had always been "skinny", I could eat and never worry about my weight. I was very active in highschool, with cheerleading, stilts, ballet, track, and even preparing for plays and talent shows.

When I got pregnant with my first son, 4 years ago (June/July 2003) I was so naive, I thought that after I had my son my body would bounce back to normal, after all at 5 months pregnant (17 wks) I was 107 lbs. The day I delivered my son I weighed 192 lbs, my heaviest ever, even to this day. After this, I was done having kids, sad but it's how I thought. :cry:

It took me 2 years to lose weight, and it all happend last year. One of my 2 wonderful and beautiful bestfriends and I took pictures for myspace, and I was horrified by what I saw. I was done, April 2006 I decided to do whatever it took to lose it. At that point I was 168 lbs. I was wearing 16's and they were tight. Ugh! I started working out all the time, and signed up for 2 different aerobic classes at the college on top of my 14 units of my reg classes. In between work, school and my son I thought I was going to die. I stopped eating, and would only consume water and sunflower seeds. :eek: I went down to 135 lbs by July. In September, I was eating again, and I was 130 lbs, when I found out I WAS PREGNANT AGAIN!!! OMG!!! :eek:

This time, I went up to 175 lbs, and I was active during pregnancy, except for my bedrest after preterm. That really messed me up. I now weigh 147 lbs. I have gone psycho excersizing, and counting calories, and doing about everything possible and safe cause I'm breastfeeding. My ultimate goal is to go down to 115 lbs. I have 32 lbs to go, and I've lost 28 lbs so far. I WILL DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO LOSE 32 LBS BY DECEMBER. :santa:

Which brings me to this site, I have to do something for me, and my paper journal aint cutting it. I'll post my daily calorie intake and exercise, including my feelings (good & bad), I've been keeping track and I'll add it here. I hope this can motivate me to keep going and doing it the right way this time, even though I have been tempted. :)

Thank you all very much!

SW- 175 :mad:
CW- 147 :confused:
TWL- 28 (so far!) :jump:
GW- 120 ;)
UGW - 115 :rolleyes:
 
Just some quicky updates!

Just transfering some of the info on my paper journal...

date weight - workout time - Calories
8-4 = 151.2 - 40 min - 1000
8-5 = 149.8 - 45 min - 680
8-6 = 149.0 - 50 min - 802
8-7 = 148.2 - 201 min - 800 (Had lots of energy, kids were gone)
8-8 = 148.0 - 60 min - 627
8-9 = 147.2 - 60 min - 437 (Garage digging)
8-10= 147.0 - 30 min - 595 (Not a good day)
8-11= 148.4 - 60 min - 966
8-12= 147.4 - 122 min - 894


I'm going to Seattle for a few days, but we're taking the pc, I should be able to log in from the hotel. I promise myself to do goooood! :)

Oh PS I have between 40 to 64 oz of water daily, I'm trying to up it, I hate water, but I think I'm starting to get used to it, considering it's the only thing I drink now unless I make a home made fruit, protein and soy smoothie.
 
Last edited:
babyjameshood said:
Hello Everyone,

My name is Wendy, I'm 25 years old and a mother of 2 wonderful boys. I had always been "skinny", I could eat and never worry about my weight. I was very active in highschool, with cheerleading, stilts, ballet, track, and even preparing for plays and talent shows.

When I got pregnant with my first son, 4 years ago (June/July 2003) I was so naive, I thought that after I had my son my body would bounce back to normal, after all at 5 months pregnant (17 wks) I was 107 lbs. The day I delivered my son I weighed 192 lbs, my heaviest ever, even to this day. After this, I was done having kids, sad but it's how I thought. :cry:

It took me 2 years to lose weight, and it all happend last year. One of my 2 wonderful and beautiful bestfriends and I took pictures for myspace, and I was horrified by what I saw. I was done, April 2006 I decided to do whatever it took to lose it. At that point I was 168 lbs. I was wearing 16's and they were tight. Ugh! I started working out all the time, and signed up for 2 different aerobic classes at the college on top of my 14 units of my reg classes. In between work, school and my son I thought I was going to die. I stopped eating, and would only consume water and sunflower seeds. :eek: I went down to 135 lbs by July. In September, I was eating again, and I was 130 lbs, when I found out I WAS PREGNANT AGAIN!!! OMG!!! :eek:

This time, I went up to 175 lbs, and I was active during pregnancy, except for my bedrest after preterm. That really messed me up. I now weigh 147 lbs. I have gone psycho excersizing, and counting calories, and doing about everything possible and safe cause I'm breastfeeding. My ultimate goal is to go down to 115 lbs. I have 32 lbs to go, and I've lost 28 lbs so far. I WILL DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO LOSE 32 LBS BY DECEMBER. :santa:

Which brings me to this site, I have to do something for me, and my paper journal aint cutting it. I'll post my daily calorie intake and exercise, including my feelings (good & bad), I've been keeping track and I'll add it here. I hope this can motivate me to keep going and doing it the right way this time, even though I have been tempted. :)

Thank you all very much!

SW- 175 :mad:
CW- 147 :confused:
TWL- 28 (so far!) :jump:
GW- 120 ;)
UGW - 115 :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

Welcome to the site and thanks for sharing your journey so far with us. We're here for you!
 
Hi,

Thank you! I'm on a mini vacation, and so far not good with the diet, oh well! I'm doing pretty good considering it's almost that time of the month, my cravings are insane. :rolleyes:

I don't have my scale either, so thats a good thing. My 7s are loser on me, and I'm bloated so that's a VERY VERY WONDERFUL THING!!!:jump:
 
Wow, your workouts are impressive! I wish I had that kind of willpower.. Keep doing what your doing and you'll get to your goal in no time:)
 
Well, I'm back!
Seattle was wonderful, and in a few month we're moving! I'm sooo tired of Modesto, CA that I can't wait!!!

On other news though... both good and very bad...
I'm down to 142 lbs... and truth is I haven't been working out as hard as I was. But I haven't been very good to my body in other ways, I've barely been eating, but not for wanting to lose weight quicker. My fiance and I have hit a very big road block, (if it can be called that). I found a number Monday the 20th, that didn't seem right. For some reason this number was bugging me, and it appeared over and over on the cell phone bill. Apparently he met this girl back in December and started pretending to be single, she had no idea I nor our 2 kids exsisted, only his 15 year old daughter was ever mentioned. This girl was very nice in giving me info, we talked on the phone after texting for about 40 minutes at one point. She's offered me the phone bills, and the messages from the texting. They both say nothing happend, but both have different story's on why, she says she wasn't ready to do anything as she's recently divorced, and he says he was never pursuing anything. No one in my family knows what a really F**KED up week this has been, nor why I've been avoiding them.

He gets mad because he hurt me, and I'm constantly crying or just can't eat. Everytime I do eat, I end up with horrible stomach cramps, along with (TMI ALERT!!!) diareah and/or puke. I can't even sleep anymore, everytime I dose off I wake up having a nightmare of this whole situation, or like last night with asthma. I decided to get drunk last night, took a night off from breastfeeding, and that actually made things worse. I was soooo angry and very verbal.

Either way, this morning I woke up at 142.0 lbs, (after gaining 2 lbs after my wonderful time of the month was gone) and being back at 149 Sunday the 19th morning after returning from our trip.

Again, it hasn't been good that I've been loosing weight this way, but I thought I'd still update. I'm soooo confused on what to do, a part of me just wants to leave, but we just had our baby MAY 26th! And too much time and effort as well as wonderful moments have gone into this relationship, he says it's been done for months now, but the bill showed just last month. MY BIRTHDAY WAS LAST MONTH!!! ugh! :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:


I'll be back later and update my ticker and crap. Hope everyone's doing great, take care all!!!

Wendy

SW 175
CW 142
GW 120
UGW 115
 
Wow. I was going to congratulate you on all your hard work and success at losing weight whenI read your last post. That is really shocking. Take care of your self and your babies. I hope you have someone sensible in your life you can go to with this to sort things out.
 
Howdy,wanted to stop by ans wish ya luck!
Also you have came such a long way you can do
it your so close to your goal maybe take your lil
ones out for a walk in the town that seems to be the
best way well atleast for me and I have 4 lil ones
16 months-9 years but I can commit to walking alot except
bad weather dyas and 100 degree days lol.Anyway have a gr8
weekend Tammy
 
Ok first off congrats on making it thus far in your goal on losing weight. Ok i'm going to tell you know I know you have 2 kids and you love your boyfriend but if your already finding numbers and have talked to the other girl then you need to trust your gut on this one. My husband who i've been with for 8 years cheated on me and has another baby with this woman who he only cheated on me with for 4 months. so yeah while i am still with my husband he knows he hurt me and i will never be able to totally forget about him cheating but we made a vow never to get divorced so while it hurt that he did this to me I choose to stay with him and make our marriage work. I do have a 3 year old too so i know how hard it is with children involved. I say make your decisions very wisely and if you trust that nothing did go down between them then let him know that while you love him you still have to rebuild your trust and that he needs to earn it. things can be very hard sometimes and even more so when kids are involved. I know from experience. We also have the military to contend with hince our seperations right now cause my hubby is deployed for 15 months. anyways keep up your strength for your boys and yourself. I wish you good luck on the rest of this journey to getting to your goal. Keep yourself and your boys healthy and if you ever need to talk you can email me at ajfavegrl@hotmail.com since i have been where you are now. and its better to talk to someone about how your feeling instead of turning to drinking or not eating.
 
Happychubette said:
Wow. I was going to congratulate you on all your hard work and success at losing weight whenI read your last post. That is really shocking. Take care of your self and your babies. I hope you have someone sensible in your life you can go to with this to sort things out.
Click to expand...


Hi and thank you!
It is really shocking, I'm crushed and completely confused. Unfortunately, I don't have anyone to talk to. I don't want to involve my parents in the events that I can get over this, and we stay together. I can't involve his parents without doing the same. As for my 2 bestfriends, they're so happy and in love with their husbands, that I feel like a complete idiot. I started mentioning it to one of them, and she's furious with the part that she knows, that one of the first things she said was "LEAVE HIM". i don't want to just say goodbye without thinking things through, nothing happend, but was it really because she wasn't ready or because he really never meant to pursue???

Thank you again, and hope to chat sometime... ;)

Wendy

SW 175
CW 142
GW 120
UGW 115
 
niapage said:
Howdy,wanted to stop by ans wish ya luck!
Also you have came such a long way you can do
it your so close to your goal maybe take your lil
ones out for a walk in the town that seems to be the
best way well atleast for me and I have 4 lil ones
16 months-9 years but I can commit to walking alot except
bad weather dyas and 100 degree days lol.Anyway have a gr8
weekend Tammy
Click to expand...



Hey Tammy,
Thanks for the reply!
I walk a lot with the boys, I strap my 11 wk old onto my front carrier (he's 14 lbs btw ;) ) and I push my 3 year old in the stroller, it's great, unfortunately Modesto gets really hot, we're expecting 103 degree weather tomorrow, and today was just around there. Not trying to jinx it, but I don't even remember the last time it rained, I may still have been pregnant.

4 kids!!! :eek: Wow! How do you do it? :D My 2 and I feel like I'm going crazy! lol
Thank you again, and have a great weekend also! Talk to you soon!


Wendy

SW 175
CW 142
GW120
UGW 115

 
Last edited:
momma4alex said:
Ok first off congrats on making it thus far in your goal on losing weight. Ok i'm going to tell you know I know you have 2 kids and you love your boyfriend but if your already finding numbers and have talked to the other girl then you need to trust your gut on this one. My husband who i've been with for 8 years cheated on me and has another baby with this woman who he only cheated on me with for 4 months. so yeah while i am still with my husband he knows he hurt me and i will never be able to totally forget about him cheating but we made a vow never to get divorced so while it hurt that he did this to me I choose to stay with him and make our marriage work. I do have a 3 year old too so i know how hard it is with children involved. I say make your decisions very wisely and if you trust that nothing did go down between them then let him know that while you love him you still have to rebuild your trust and that he needs to earn it. things can be very hard sometimes and even more so when kids are involved. I know from experience. We also have the military to contend with hince our seperations right now cause my hubby is deployed for 15 months. anyways keep up your strength for your boys and yourself. I wish you good luck on the rest of this journey to getting to your goal. Keep yourself and your boys healthy and if you ever need to talk you can email me at ajfavegrl@hotmail.com since i have been where you are now. and its better to talk to someone about how your feeling instead of turning to drinking or not eating.
Click to expand...



Thank you, for your words and for sharing your story. I really am confused on what to do. He knows how I feel, we've talked A LOT. He's been going out of his way to show me affection, help me with the boys, and constantly telling me he loves me, and just reasurring me. Taking me up to San Mateo to his job, and spending every minute that he's out of work with us. Tuesday morning after getting off the phone with (Tricia - the girl, 37 y/o btw) I packed my bags, the boys bags and packed my car.
He's a manager at a Marriott hotel down by the bay, and on weekends he works at a club also in the bay, that's where they met, at the club. They both have different sides to story, and because the trust has been broken / violated I don't quite believe him. He mentioned it was a midlife crisis type thing (he'll be 36 in 2 wks), he also mentioned that with him being gone so long, and every time we talked on the phone I was either crying cause I missed him, my hormones were making me wacko and I complained about the excess morning sickness and the weight gain. That he needed an OUTLET, and in order for the conversations to continue HE HAD TO CONTINUE PRETENDING THAT HE WAS SINGLE, UGH!!!! How dare he?! The pregnancy was his doing in the first place, we were using condoms and I trusted that we were going to wait to have more kids MUCH LATER, not now.
Anywho, he's cried lots also. But his tears now don't do anything for me, I don't feel the slightest bit of sadness when he cries about this. If anything I just want to scream at him to stop his BULL SH*T!

I'm praying that we can continue, and that we do have our lives together. But this is going to take so much time. I normally don't drink, and last night after a beer 1/2 I was done! I was drunk and regreting the calories, lol But I guess I just took advantage and let everything come out. I'm glad I did, he says he's hurting because I'm hurting... GOOD!:mad:

And before I forget, he's such a f**king hypocrit (not sure how to spell that), but a car passed by our house yesterday morning before we left for the bay and I was wearing shorts and a tank top with a bikini underneath, and a car with 4 guys passed by and they honked and he got so mad, then while we were at the beach he was getting mad everytime a guy would pass by and look. I guess I have lost weight! Personally, I loved it, my selfesteem loved it, and just the fact that it bothered him I loved it! I just smiled and was flirty in that way. He says HE GETS IT, but I don't think he has quite yet! I'll post some pics up.

Ok, sorry this turned into a novel, wow! BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! lol
Thank you again and my email is babyjameshood@hotmail.com... hope to hear from you again...

Take care, :)
 
Pictures

Ok, so I said I was going to put pics up, and well... here they are. I still have ways to go, but I feel soo good about my progress. I went to the gym today and plan on going swiming in a few. I took a few pics this morning (8-26-07) they were taken by me with my camera phone, so unfortunatly it isn't the greatest quality but what the heck!?


8-26-07side.jpg


I HATE this fat flap, but it's gotten soooooo much smaller, I feel wonderful!
8-26-07.jpg


And as for my belly button and stretch marks, well I wont even go there...
8-26-07front.jpg



Be back later,

Wendy
 
Well, haven't weighed myself yet since I'm still not home, so I don't know where I'm at. Had a good breakfast today, but my stomachs killing me now, this stress is driving me insane.

I got a Womans World magazine last night and started reading the main article which caught my attention...
"Easiest-ever way to Lose 7 lbs a Week", it talks about hypnosis, theres a website with it for just the trial which says with just that you can lose 7lbs with, haven't tried it yet. I'm not looking for a quick weight loss scam, and technically I've been doing pretty good, but whatever I buy these kinds of mags all the time. It's my weakness and downfall cause I never even buy the products to do the stuff with, even when it's food involved I always forget to buy them whenever I go to the grocery store.

Alright, gotta go... I'll update my workout for yesterday and today along with food entry later. Gotta get ready to check out in a few hours and I want to go swiming again... they even have a tennis court!!! Great for a stress buster, it helps alleviate my anger. Be back later!
 
Hey sweetheart, I really feel for you the way your husband has treated you when you were pregnant and vulnerable. That is really fucked up! I dont think its up to others to tell you to leave him, but definitely watch your back with him henceforth. If he can do it while your preggers, then who knows..though I wouldn't be too quick to leave either if I had 2 kids to look out for. Sounds like he got a taste of his own medicine with those guys whistling at you :rolleyes:.

You look so good in your pics. I know you want to get back to your old body, but be careful about slowing down your metabolism. I know you're having trouble eating as you're upset, but try to get at least 1200 calories down (either via drinking or some ice cream or whatever). You do not want your metabolism to slow down at such a young age, and the body can't go forever on too little before it starts doing annoying things like holding onto every bit of fat.

I truly hope things work out the way you would like.

P.S. I'm 39 so somehow I don't view 36 as mid-life and certainly way too early to use the "mid life crisis" excuse. I mean come the fuck on, that is LAME and he needs to stop with that!
 
Blancita said:
Hey sweetheart, I really feel for you the way your husband has treated you when you were pregnant and vulnerable. That is really fucked up! I dont think its up to others to tell you to leave him, but definitely watch your back with him henceforth. If he can do it while your preggers, then who knows..though I wouldn't be too quick to leave either if I had 2 kids to look out for. Sounds like he got a taste of his own medicine with those guys whistling at you :rolleyes:.

You look so good in your pics. I know you want to get back to your old body, but be careful about slowing down your metabolism. I know you're having trouble eating as you're upset, but try to get at least 1200 calories down (either via drinking or some ice cream or whatever). You do not want your metabolism to slow down at such a young age, and the body can't go forever on too little before it starts doing annoying things like holding onto every bit of fat.

I truly hope things work out the way you would like.

P.S. I'm 39 so somehow I don't view 36 as mid-life and certainly way too early to use the "mid life crisis" excuse. I mean come the fuck on, that is LAME and he needs to stop with that!
Click to expand...



Hi and thank you.
I'm still not quite there with all this, I usually write in my "paper / private journal" about f*cked up things, just to get 'em out. I haven't been able to do that. I actually typed more here then I did there. I still can't believe he did that, not to mention the pathetic excuses he's given. He has been more affectionate since it happend, but I just can't give all of myself anymore. I told him, the trust is GONE. :cry: And I really do have a remark about everything. He gets angry about it, but why am I supposed to just forgive and forget, it's only been a week, it's still too fresh / raw. I haven't lost anymore weight, I did start eating about 1300 calories this past few days, but I end up in the bathroom, with serious pains. I have never been able to eat under serious stress. My throat hurts, and I'm surprissed I still have tears left. One minute we're fine, but then something happens or I get lost in thought and we're back at it. :boxing:

As for the midlife crissis, I don't agree with that BS either. My kids, well, I'm not sticking around because of them, if anything and things continue badly or getting worse, I preffer to move us out of our home, seperate us from him. I refuse to let them see us constantly fighting about it. It might be healthier for them to not be around it, but only time will tell what will happen. I just want to take things one day at a time, and like I told him it's going to take a lot of time to trust him, and allow myself to fully open up to him again.

Oh well, I'm back to working out and eating, well sort of. I am drinking tons of water though. But I was really bad last night, we went to Santa Cruz and I've never been there, much less the board walk. It was fun and I ate almost a full bag of COTTON CANDY, ugh!!!!! It was sooo yummy and I got soooo hyper, but I paid for it later with serious tummy aches and I'm still hurting horribly today. I'm not punishing myself for it, I enjoyed it and after this week, I deserved something, maybe not that but screw it!

Oh well, thank you again and have a great day... ttys!
 
Just an exercise update!

We're back home today, and my stomachs worse than ever, at least the headache I'd had since, has diminished some. It's still there, but eased up quite a bit.
Um... I ran yesterday, not jogged, but RAN. I haven't sprinted like that in years. I sprinted for about 1.5 miles straight, then started running in and out of the ocean. Sprinting, avoiding getting hit with really cold water. I was also doing 2 toe touch, hand stands, cart-wheels and attempted repeatedly to do back hand springs. :jump: It's been a year since I last cheered, and 5 since the last back hand spring. I also went swiming, did 20 full laps at the pool.

As for food yesterday, I was bad...
Baggel, cream cheese, sausage and 2 hard boiled eggs for breakfast, along with 8 ounces of milk.
I had grapes and plums along with roasted chicken for lunch. Drank passion fruit.
Dinner, well I forgot to eat honestly, but I had cotton candy, horrible but I didn't really care. And am not beating myself up for it.

My weight was at the same today 142.0

My little one's starting to cry, I gotta go, be back later!!!
 
Another hot day!

Ugh, I don't handle heat very well, and today was horrible! The heat makes me lazy and hungry,along with cranky. I was all of the above, and to make matters worse, I'm retaining water like crazy. My fingers are so pudgy, even my middle feels rounder than just a few days ago. Stupid really, but the more I go potty the more bloated I am, what the hell is that all about?! :confused:

Well, I had 2 home-made fruit smoothies, a strawberry whipped yogurt, 1/2 cup green grapes, 7 bottles of 16.9 oz of water, a glass of guava pinnapple juice, a pack of sunflower seeds (I was retaining water prior to this), and a bryers natural strawberry fruit bar, oh... and a chicken sandwhich, with lettuce, peppers, cilantro and dijonaise. I have spent most of my day back in the potty again too, :mad:

Exercise, exercise... I did an hour of Max Burn Winsor Pilates, and I worked on the stepper for 20 minutes, all I've wanted to do today has been nap, and go swiming, but ofcourse we're no longer at the hotel, so that's not an option. I should have brought the slip and slide out and done that. Probably for tomorrow's forecast. :rolleyes:

I'll shut up now, I feel that all I've done on my daily diary entry / update has been bitch! So, on that note, I'm off. I promise to do better with calories and exercise tomorrow.

Good night everyone! :sleeping:
 
Well, I'm finally back home. Again. I love being gone for gym and pool advantages, along with comfy mattresses, but I sure hate living out of a suitcase. Anywho, I'm being good on my diet, I went shopping and got a bunch of outfits and I'm so happy to report that I had to try on different sizes to figure out what size fits! :D

I even attended a pool party at the hotel, I was so nervous but I went with it and had fun. Just happy my nerves didn't get the best of me. Here's a pic right before heading to the party, I took it myself again, and its not full body, but it does show my main trouble area.

I'm still stuck at 142 lbs, but... I've lost inches cause my jeans are falling off by just walking. Woo Hoo!!!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top