Lack of Support for Weight Loss

X

Xav

0
This is somewhat of a rant about friends not being as supportive as they could be about weight loss goals. In a short version, I'm a 6ft2 male from the UK who started out at 240lbs at the end of may and sit now at around 210lbs after a long summer of intensitve weight training, HIIT, running and most importantly a complete rework of my diet.

Friends and family have noticed my weight loss and some have even complemented me on it. I've always been fairly well built but kidded myself for a long time that I was in shape, when the majority of my body was just covered in a nice layer of flab. That layer is nearly all gone and I dont mind saying I'm in the best condition of my life and pushing the boundaries all the time. Ultimate goal is 10% bodyfat by jan 2009.

Anyway the point of this is how little support I have had from my friends. Its almost as if no-one really understands what I'm trying to achieve. I get laughed at because I wont eat from fast food chains. When I tell people I'm not drinking on a particular night they look at me like I've got the plague. When I drink my whey shakes they look at me like I'm crazy. And when they see my evening meal of chicken or steak and vegetables I daren't tell them I dont eat starchy carbs after 6pm because they'd probably declare me a practitioner of witchcraft. And the STRANGEST thing is the people that give me the most stick are those amongst my friends that are the most overweight. They hate that I eat small portions, and hate even more that after 3 months of getting used to this style of eating I now feel full after such portions. They hate the idea that I'm satisfied eating half the amounts they do. Some of the girls at lunch today even made jokes about me 'not being a real man' because of the amount of food I ate daily - implying that I was the one with the problem because I had worked out exactly what my body needs each day and fed it exactly that.

Some days I want to sit them down and talk to them about the merits of manipulating macronutrient ratios, but that would probably just give them more ammunition.

If I had to guess, I'd say this falls into the category of people fearing/mocking what they dont understand. I suppose I expected support or encouragement, and was wrong. Now my bf% is getting low to the point where my body will start fighting harder to hold onto fat tissue, and I will need to step up my game. Then I'm guessing the mockery will increase. I'm just a little disheartened by this. But every time I get on the scales I'm reminded that I'm doing this for me, and only me. And that makes all this worth it. It would just be easier with a little support.
 
Maybe you just come across as being a little bit OTT about your diet. It's usual for a small bunch of people to mock you if you start improving yourself, a lot of it is probably jealousy, but it sounds like just about everyone you know is making digs about it.
Have you ever wondered if you come across as being a bit obsessive?
 
I had considered the obsession factor, but I like to think I'm fairly subtle about the choices I make and the consistency with which I make them. I certainly dont harp on about not eating 'unhealthy food' or anything like that, because I dont really want to shove my lifestyle choices in the faces of others.
 
Jealousy. They wish they were as dedicated as you are. Truth be known, they'd all like to lose 30 pounds also but they just don't have the test icles to get with the program and get it done. Take it as a compliment!
 
Get used to it, people look at me like I have corn growing out of my ears when I bring my own food with me. Who cares? Tell your friends to F$$%K off and have a good laugh about it
 
I agree with GT2003 -- your friends are probably jealous.

People have always given me a hard time about my diet choices. They make fun of me, make jokes about my food choices, and think they're being really funny. Until they see me inject insulin or I tell them I'm diabetic. Then they go into a tailspin trying to back up and retract what they previously said.

Gooch, it's nice to know I'm not the only person that brings their own food to parties :D
 
Xav said:
This is somewhat of a rant about friends not being as supportive as they could be about weight loss goals. In a short version, I'm a 6ft2 male from the UK who started out at 240lbs at the end of may and sit now at around 210lbs after a long summer of intensitve weight training, HIIT, running and most importantly a complete rework of my diet.

Friends and family have noticed my weight loss and some have even complemented me on it. I've always been fairly well built but kidded myself for a long time that I was in shape, when the majority of my body was just covered in a nice layer of flab. That layer is nearly all gone and I dont mind saying I'm in the best condition of my life and pushing the boundaries all the time. Ultimate goal is 10% bodyfat by jan 2009.

Anyway the point of this is how little support I have had from my friends. Its almost as if no-one really understands what I'm trying to achieve. I get laughed at because I wont eat from fast food chains. When I tell people I'm not drinking on a particular night they look at me like I've got the plague. When I drink my whey shakes they look at me like I'm crazy. And when they see my evening meal of chicken or steak and vegetables I daren't tell them I dont eat starchy carbs after 6pm because they'd probably declare me a practitioner of witchcraft. And the STRANGEST thing is the people that give me the most stick are those amongst my friends that are the most overweight. They hate that I eat small portions, and hate even more that after 3 months of getting used to this style of eating I now feel full after such portions. They hate the idea that I'm satisfied eating half the amounts they do. Some of the girls at lunch today even made jokes about me 'not being a real man' because of the amount of food I ate daily - implying that I was the one with the problem because I had worked out exactly what my body needs each day and fed it exactly that.

Some days I want to sit them down and talk to them about the merits of manipulating macronutrient ratios, but that would probably just give them more ammunition.

If I had to guess, I'd say this falls into the category of people fearing/mocking what they dont understand. I suppose I expected support or encouragement, and was wrong. Now my bf% is getting low to the point where my body will start fighting harder to hold onto fat tissue, and I will need to step up my game. Then I'm guessing the mockery will increase. I'm just a little disheartened by this. But every time I get on the scales I'm reminded that I'm doing this for me, and only me. And that makes all this worth it. It would just be easier with a little support.
Click to expand...

A person never lacks support and its always personally available.

It's psychologically and biologically within; one has to be consciously aware of it; know how to properly process and utilize it. One needs a big strong hand to reach in grab the soul to express these infinite riches, and the precious gifts received can never be accessed by anyone. You become alive and surrounded by an impenetrable shield beating inside yourself. Strum each finger through your soul, feel with accuracy of what you feel, realize and examine what you perceive. Investigate, and just for once, comprehend the master. You can't be defeated, not even by yourself.

The greatest artwork ever created is brushing and painting the power of the soul. It is the greatest personal friendship within your body you will ever possess.

The music created will open the gate of the power kingdom. Your vision becomes clear through this one-way window and nourishes your being as you open the window and view the pictures of life, and realize you have a resolved and impenetrable soul as you receive the lessons of living life.

And, do not forget it.



Stayen' Alive......on the inside...and you recognize and kill all the jive talken' bull-sh^t, and you are fortress that can not be defeated.

Tip the cup to your soul, take an educated walk with your goal, others will be in awe.....as they stay stuck going no where.

The inner soul is the toughest "thing" on earth. A weak soul is death, and some walk in this death, and are unaware of it.


Best regards,


Chillen
 
Last edited:
Same thing happens with me, I tell my friends that I have to eat certain times of the days and eat certain amount of cals per day and they just mock me, some compliment me, they are just jealous.
 
I'm pretty much a vegan. I only eat meat to celebrate an achievement or special occasion. As if that weren't enough ammunition, I don't really drink at all, ever. You should see some of the looks I get when I go to a bar with friends only to order a garden salad, no dressing, a glass of water, and a single beer which I will drink over the course of a couple hours.

People don't care about your health, they care about their health. When they see you turning down food they would accept, they see that you're taking better care of yourself. This makes them feel like they aren't taking care of themselves, so they try to make it look like your lifestyle is unhealthy which is why they aren't doing it to.

Just keep doing what you're doing, if they laugh at how little you're eating, just laugh at how hungry they are. Ask them if they'd like dessert when they're done. Start tempting them with chocolate and ice cream that you know they WISH they had your will power to avoid. If they're going to mock you for eating healthy, tempt them to eat garbage and get all fat so you can laugh at them when you've reached your goal and they're starting to freak out about gaining so much weight. If they're going to tell you to eat more, then you egg them on to eat more. Chances are they'll do it just to gloat.

But when they're 15lbs fatter than they were when you started your diet, they'll realize that they've got nothing to gloat about and that you probably knew what you were talking about.
 
Last edited:
It sounds like your family are just worried because maybe you have lost too much and are going abit over the top? If you feel like you are doing the right thing for yourself then carry on the way you are, at the end of the day its your body :)
 
....And you always have sites like this one to turn to for that particular support or rant. Oh well, at the end of the day, you know you're doing the right thing for you, and hopefully some of your friends will turn that jealousy into aspiration to be in shape like you. Sadly it's not always the case with some ppl I know--trying to encourage them to follow the same path is a hit and miss but I bet it sure does feel great when you do make that influence.
 
What are you looking for a cookie and a pat on the back? The motivation and incentive is staring at you everyday... Look at the mirrior and notice the improvement and well your cardiovascular system is improving. Are you feeling better physically and this should translate to mental wellness as well.

Here's the deal, the lack of support may bring you down for a bit but USE that as a motivational factor. Lose another 30 lbs and keep it off. Then they will take you seriously. Realistically, you sound almost like you are about to give up which would prove them 100% right that you are going through a phase and it will pass. You are just doing a yo-yo diet and cannot sustain this. Keep up what you are doing and laugh with them and see who gets the last laugh when you have that model figure.

I was teased about my food consumption myself when I dieted from friends and family but now they look at my physique and look at it in awee.. I've even motivated some of the people around me to diet and excercise because of the result that they saw. The weight loss diet was a stepping stone in the transformation that I am trying to get to and don't let negative people drag you down. Look and focus on the positive and let all the negative remark go from one ear and out the other. I am going to end this with a cliche:
"Life will give you what you are looking for."
 
Just tell your mates "Have fun having heart trouble in your 40's" whilst you will still be running around as if your 28
 
I'm sort of in the same boat as you.

Not having a hard time with motivation though. What would you rather have? The taste of a burger for 4 seconds or six pack abs for the rest of your life?
After seeing crap food for what it is, I don't even think I could enjoy it if I tried.

And you friends giving you crap is definitely jealousy. I haven't gotten any of that from my friends, just comments like "damn, you're in pretty good shape, i should start working out too". If anyone were to give me any lip, I'd lecture them on the importance of a good diet and exercise like i was their mother.

At the end of the day, its all about being happy. I've found through my time here on earth that working towards long term happiness and health is what is right for me. Everyone has to chose.
I've made my decision.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top