Little John's trying again. And again. Aaaand again.

Little John said:
Regarding the issues of reaching out for help... yup, same here. I have a wife who's always there for me, but I don't feel like I should be unloading ALL my miseries on her, and eventually I shut down to unloading ZERO miseries, then I shrink into myself. Three guesses how I handle that little ball of misery...
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I can sooooooooooo relate! :oops::confused:
I take care of everyone and even strangers (lol) and I get lost...I forget to take care of me...I'm not good about unloading and then I can actually feel the stress and tension.. :ack2: That leads to a binge or a full day of crying uncontrollably and feelin' like at any moment someone is on their way to carry me off to the nervous hospital.
 
I need to vent about a wicked snack attack that hit me yesterday afternoon. I was hungry all afternoon, even though I did my lunch "right" (ate slowly, lots of vegetables, whole grain rice). But I controlled myself, no vendor machine visits, nothing like that. I got home, had a snack of Wheat Thins and hummus and a small handful of mixed nuts and 2 pints of water.

30 minutes later, I was desperate to fill my stomach. My normal 350-cal snack hit 850 in the end, and I was still willing to eat more. Mind you, I wasn't hungry, I was looking to fill a void. But I don't know what that void was - work was pretty good yesterday, things were quiet at home, there was no rationale. I was aware of it while it was happening, and I was doing my best to control it, but it was powerful. And there was no reason I couldn't have just had another glass of water and sat down to do some semi-meditation, but that damn urge...

The DGAF* Me probably would have pulled in 2,000 calories, so I guess there's that.

Luckily dinner was a low-calorie, high vegetable meal, and I did manage to come in below calorie goal for the day.

Also, I rowed while watching the peak of Australian culture on Netflix: Danger 5. I love stoner humor, even though I can't touch the stuff anymore.

*Don't Give A Darn
 
Some days are like that. You minimize the damage, analyze the reasons or lack thereof, and you get back on track right away. If this is how you handle it and you work towards reducing their frequency and magnitude then it's just a blip that won't affect your long-term goals.
 
Hey LJ! Just checking in on your diary.

I used to get late afternoon cravings like that where I basically couldn't function at work anymore and desperately wanted to eat something. Low cal carb-based snacks didn't really do much for me. Sugary treats made me feel better in the moment but are obviously terrible for you. I don't know if your situation is the same, but at least for me I think it was a result of a high-carb diet and blood sugar levels going up and down during the day, tanking a couple hours after lunch. Lean protein-based snacks are supposed to stabilize blood sugar levels throughout the day and prevent that late afternoon crash or the same snacking urge. My coworker keeps a jar of peanut butter in his office and just has a single spoon in the afternoon if he starts to crash. Just 1 spoon! Very few cals. But apparently the protein helps his blood sugar stay stable.
 
Yesterday was like that, too, Q, but not quite so unmanageable. To be honest, I don't remember what my snack was, but I ended the day well under caloric goals until, well, you'll see. Probably too far under, might need to think about a slightly bigger or earlier PM snack.

Baboon, I do try to have something on-hand for the afternoon, but the problem is that it can be too easily accessible. If I had a jar of PB at my desk, I'd fall into the "just one more" trap until half the jar was gone. I've had the best luck keeping some kind of bar snack (granola, protein, dark chocolate) in my trunk so I can grab one for the drive home. Only works in the cold weather, though - heat tends to melt that stuff! Also a small bag of mixed nuts can be my friend.

Yesterday went well, I must say. As I said, stayed under the goal, at least until the bag of Minty Thin Oreos was unveiled. Oh, those are bad - meaning really tasty. I did end up under the goal after a surplus intake, but those aren't the good calories.

Breakfast and lunch, same as yesterday. I need to think of something to add to the lunch that will scratch the sweet itch. Used to have a United Way candy sale down the hall, and a couple of mini peppermint patties did nicely, but I think there was too much dishonor in the honor system, so it's gone.

Skipped rowing yesterday, as expected/planned. I'm aiming to jump on as soon as I get home tonight, and again tomorrow morning (or maybe a longish walk since it's spoda be a nice day). That would make 5 days of exercise in a week. Not heavy exercise, but it's a start.

Going to also look into getting a standing/sitting workstation at my desk. I think if I can get a little more time on my feet, I'd feel more obligated to stretch the bridge cables more. We'll see.
 
I haven't been taking my own advice lately but I had temporary luck with coconut almond date rolls to quench that urge for a sweet after lunch. I bought them premade but I keep meaning to make something at home. And bonus points for the fiber, yay! There are also flavored almonds that might be worth a shot, I like to measure out a portion or two to keep at my desk.
 
Hi LJ,

Sounds like you are killing it. Well done!! I actually use dates too, as my favorite snack- nice and sweet and takes away those cravings. Almonds are awesome for that too.
 
Happy Monday folks.

Q, never heard of coconut almond date rolls, they sound good!

Cowboy, dates sound like a great idea - figs, too. They have that almost-chocolateness to them that might do the trick.

So my weekend was OK, some goods and bads, but no "shame" moments. I was over calorie goal on Saturday and Sunday, but there was no binging, just eating stuff I like and making smart choices where I could.

I didn't row on Saturday, but I did spend most of the day on my feet working on a table I've been building (not the pretty kind of table), so I'm calling that exercise. I did row yesterday, though, and glad for it.

I don't see too many big challenges this week. My rowing time will be increasing this week, so the problem is getting away from family responsibilities for that time. I realize that doesn't make me unique, but that's the deal.
 
I hear you about the family thing. I always looked at my time away from them ( running or whatever) as time I spend on myself to make me healthier and able to spend even more time with them in the future. It has worked out so far.

Keeping busy always keeps my mind off food. It is when I sit down for a time that I think -" Man, I really feel like something". So I am always doing something and try to keep my sitting around time to a minimum

Good job on controlling the binging. It can be a hard thing to do sometimes.
 
Little John said:
Happy Monday folks.

Q, never heard of coconut almond date rolls, they sound good!

Cowboy, dates sound like a great idea - figs, too. They have that almost-chocolateness to them that might do the trick.

So my weekend was OK, some goods and bads, but no "shame" moments. I was over calorie goal on Saturday and Sunday, but there was no binging, just eating stuff I like and making smart choices where I could.

I didn't row on Saturday, but I did spend most of the day on my feet working on a table I've been building (not the pretty kind of table), so I'm calling that exercise. I did row yesterday, though, and glad for it.

I don't see too many big challenges this week. My rowing time will be increasing this week, so the problem is getting away from family responsibilities for that time. I realize that doesn't make me unique, but that's the deal.
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One of my favorite moments during a weight loss journey is when people do something that's not necessarily exercise and then count it as exercise, HAHAHA. I do that every once in a while, especially when I'm feeling lazy or tired but don't want to admit it.

"I was on my feet all day at work. That counts as my exercise."
"We went to the mall and walked around for a while. That counts as my exercise."
"I had to get off the couch and walk aaaaall the way over to the refrigerator to pour myself a glass of root beer. EXERCISE!!!"

No, but seriously, it seems like you've been doing good. I think on the days when we go over our calorie limit it isn't necessarily a bad thing, especially if the food we ate was healthy. As long as good choices are being made I don't think you should every really feel bad about anything.
 
Cowboy - You're right, I am making a better me - short-term I get to burn off any negative feelings from the day, long-term I get to stick around a little longer. I definitely need to increase my "doing something" activities for the same reason you stated.

Chef - Yeah, yeah, I know I'm rationalizing, but considering I'm a professional sitter (engineer), spending the day on my feet is an upgrade! And I have to climb a set of stairs if I want to travel from my TV to the fridge, it's no Club Med!

Stayed below goal nicely yesterday, including a half-hour row (at a slow-assed pace). On my last frozen meal for lunch today, so I'll be keeping busy tonight by putting together new meals tonight. Not a terribly exciting activity, but it saves money and calories.

In weight news, I'm happy to report that things are going in the right direction. From my horrifying weigh-in a couple weeks ago of 380, I checked in at 355 today. Obviously a lot of it was water/saturation loss, but I'm feeling much better, in general, and looking forward to continuing the adventure.
 
OK, one more thing - confession: I did have an emotional binge last night. Overwhelmed by medical bills, and feeling helpless to fix them - kind of came to a head last night so I wolfed a king size bag of M&Ms. Barely even tasted them. Didn't fix the problem, didn't make me feel better, just made me more moody - which is always amplified on Monday evenings, anyway.
 
380 to 355 is pretty damn good, water weight or not. Good job! Don't worry about the binge last night. It happens. Today is a new day. :) Also, I like the term "professional sitter"... I might use that. lol!
 
Wow, that's an impressive loss! Even if a lot of it was water, it's good not to have all that excess fluid hanging around.

Also, i've done the m&m thing before. Just have to dust yourself off and move on.
 
:iagree: with all of the above. Just dust yourself off & move on. 380 to 355 is bloody marvellous. You can do this LJ!
PS.Don't buy any more M&M's!! Deadly little fat & sugar bombs!
 
Congratulations on your progress! It's amazing and inspiring! I am also a binge eater. The only thing that works for me is "One day at a time." I know it's cliche, but it really has helped. When that binge craving strikes, I just tell myself, "Not today. Who knows what tomorrow will bring, but today I will find something else to do, like take a nice hot bath or play with my dog."
 
Little John said:
OK, one more thing - confession: I did have an emotional binge last night. Overwhelmed by medical bills, and feeling helpless to fix them - kind of came to a head last night so I wolfed a king size bag of M&Ms. Barely even tasted them. Didn't fix the problem, didn't make me feel better, just made me more moody - which is always amplified on Monday evenings, anyway.
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Well, it's good that you're able to confess your momentary lapse. At least you are aware that it was a weak moment. But, at least you aren't letting it beat you up.
 
StacyH said:
Have A Goal Reachin' Week!
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I've been quiet this week, but it has been meeting target. I might start up my CHaTAM Challenge soon, feels like my anatidae are organizing into a linear pattern.

jen_renee said:
Also, I like the term "professional sitter"... I might use that.
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We can form a trade union!


-Cory- said:
Also, i've done the m&m thing before. Just have to dust yourself off and move on.
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Yup, and I have!

cate said:
PS.Don't buy any more M&M's!! Deadly little fat & sugar bombs!
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I can't make that promise, Cate, but I can say that I am trying to lessen my dependence on M&Ms as antidepressants.

DynamicRange said:
When that binge craving strikes, I just tell myself, "Not today
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Yes, this is something I need to remember. Might be worth setting up a reminder on my phone every afternoon to keep the thought on the top of my mind when I need it most.

ChefChiTown said:
At least you are aware that it was a weak moment.
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Yup, even while it was happening I was aware of that. I need to build up that "Not today" muscle.

So good past couple days. I skipped the row on Tues (as planned), but also managed to control my intake nicely, in spite of spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. Lots of sauce and spinach, less spaghetti, life is good. Weds (yesterday) was more food - damn you taco night and homemade brownies - but my row was about half an hour so I came in at 30 calories over goal. Pretty sure those got burned off in walking around for work yesterday, and I'm generally ~300 calories under goal.
 
Good job, LJ!! Tacos and brownies.... *sniffle*..... I want some. :( Chef made taco shells out of cheese one time, they were pretty good. I might have to ask him to do that again... Or do lettuce wraps. Low carb sucks! haha!
 
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