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WitchywomanN

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Hello everyone. I'm 40 yrs old and overweight. I have completely blown my right knee and was told by the doctors that in order to get a knee replacement I have to lose 30 pounds. I currently weight 269 #s at the time they told me this, May 29th, I weighed 290 #s. I'm 9 pounds from my first goal. 80 pounds from my end goal. In the past month and a half I've lost 21 pounds and seemed to have plateaued. My knee hurts all the time and it seems I'm doing this alone. My husband is over weight by about 110 pounds and doesn't seem to care so is of no help. My children are grown and gone. I feel alone. I decided to look for others in the same boat I'm in. I came across this forum and hope, maybe, just maybe, I've found some support.


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Update

Just weighed myself and in 43 days I've lost 25 pounds! 5 more and I get my knee replacement!!!!


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Welcome to the forum. :)

Well done on your weight loss so far. You seem to be doing great, and I am sure that your knee replacement is going to make life a lot easier for you. I know what it's like to be in constant pain (arthritis in my feet and knees), and it definitely makes it even more difficult to do something about your weight. But it looks like you have made a really good start. Just keep in mind to slow down once you had your surgery - losing weight too fast will make you more likely to put it back on (been there, done that, unfortunately). I know you needed to lose as much as possible to get to the weight they will let you have the surgery, but after that, you should slow down and take it a bit easier, so the lbs stay off, and so you can enjoy your new knee. :)
 
San said:
Welcome to the forum. :)

Well done on your weight loss so far. You seem to be doing great, and I am sure that your knee replacement is going to make life a lot easier for you. I know what it's like to be in constant pain (arthritis in my feet and knees), and it definitely makes it even more difficult to do something about your weight. But it looks like you have made a really good start. Just keep in mind to slow down once you had your surgery - losing weight too fast will make you more likely to put it back on (been there, done that, unfortunately). I know you needed to lose as much as possible to get to the weight they will let you have the surgery, but after that, you should slow down and take it a bit easier, so the lbs stay off, and so you can enjoy your new knee. :)
Click to expand...

I agree. I'm being "overly aggressive" right now. Once the knee replacement happens I plan on doing the "correct" calorie and carb in take. My only issue getting through it is the mood swings. As you can see from my first post, no support and doing it alone while a spouse eats all the goodies is rather depressing at times.


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WitchywomanN said:
I agree. I'm being "overly aggressive" right now. Once the knee replacement happens I plan on doing the "correct" calorie and carb in take. My only issue getting through it is the mood swings. As you can see from my first post, no support and doing it alone while a spouse eats all the goodies is rather depressing at times.
Click to expand...

I know the feeling. My husband is the same - he is hugely overweight, eats what he wants, and doesn't exactly make it easy on me with wanting all sorts of crap in the house. I'm making two meals every dinner time because he won't eat what I eat, and complains when I'm 'grumpy' - which does happen occasionally. I usually try to just ignore him as much as possible when it comes to losing weight. At least I am trying to do something, if that makes me a bit grumpy every now and again, it's damn well worth it. If he says anything, I always counter with 'I want to manage to still be alive by my 40th birthday, and if I don't do something, that isn't going to happen'. That usually shuts him up.

There's plenty of support on this board, and it has helped me loads of times. If you haven't done so, maybe head over to the diary section and start a diary, or just read through a few of other people. You're definitely not alone in your quest! :)
 
kinda off-topic but question to San : why fast weight lose may mean that you'll get back your weight also, how fast are we talking about?

Thanks.
 
Benny Bent said:
kinda off-topic but question to San : why fast weight lose may mean that you'll get back your weight also, how fast are we talking about?

Thanks.
Click to expand...

I don't think there are any set amounts of how fast is too fast, really. As a general rule, it's said that you shouldn't go over about 2 lbs loss per week, unless you're extremely heavy. It's the crash diets that are really the issue - people almost stop eating, or do fasts for a month, lose a lot of weight, but it's not a lifestyle they can keep up for a long period of time. If you don't eat enough and try to starve yourself, your body goes into emergency mode, your metabolism slows down and loads of other changes happen. So if you stop starving yourself, because you can't keep it up forever, and just eat normally, you pile the pounds back on faster than before.
 
San said:
As a general rule, it's said that you shouldn't go over about 2 lbs loss per week, unless you're extremely heavy.
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I have seen it described that a healthy rate is 1% of what you weigh per week... I like that as it really does allow for the fact that we all come in all sorts of shapes and sizes...

It means that the 1 to 2 pounds that people describe in magazine articles as being healthy is right for people who weigh from 100 to 200 pounds... Lots of people are over 200 pounds and a rate of over 2 pounds a week is still perfectly healthy. People that are fairly light and are trying to lose just a few pounds can struggle to lose 2 pounds...
 
WitchywomanN said:
Hello everyone. I'm 40 yrs old and overweight. I have completely blown my right knee and was told by the doctors that in order to get a knee replacement I have to lose 30 pounds. I currently weight 269 #s at the time they told me this, May 29th, I weighed 290 #s. I'm 9 pounds from my first goal. 80 pounds from my end goal. In the past month and a half I've lost 21 pounds and seemed to have plateaued. My knee hurts all the time and it seems I'm doing this alone. My husband is over weight by about 110 pounds and doesn't seem to care so is of no help. My children are grown and gone. I feel alone. I decided to look for others in the same boat I'm in. I came across this forum and hope, maybe, just maybe, I've found some support.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD
Click to expand...

Congratulations on losing 25 pounds... You are really close to your 30 pound initial target which will get you a new knee.

I found that I had to totally detach my weight loss attempts from those of my husband before I could get anywhere... Before that - I abandoned every diet the same day that my husband abandoned his...

I found that the best thing for me to do was to announce what I was making for a main meal in the morning and ask my husband if he wanted some... If he said "yes" I made enough for us both... If not - I tried to get him to sort himself out... Maybe that would work for you...

I think that my husband was secretly jealous of my weight loss - but not such that he controlled his food or became more active...

Now he is a lot more active and is better with his food than he used to be - but it took years and a lot to happen before we got to this stage...

You have a major incentive to drop those remaining 5 pounds... The new knee will bring you more pleasure than the satisfaction of a momentary nice taste in your mouth could ever give you. Keep on going after that and make all your weight loss dreams come true... As you become lighter you will be able to really enjoy your new knee and ensure that you keep yourself in tip top condition... They say life begins at 40... You will have a good start on me... I didn't half my start weight until I was 48 years old... Now I am nearly 54 and feel and act younger than I did at 30...
 
Very interesting. I've seen this wife/husband thing from the husband side. My wife is really supportive, but she's one of those darn-genetically blessed people that don't seem to ever gain weight. I'm the opposite.

I get extremely grouchy when I'm hungry too, and I've been hungry for the last 14 months. I'm going to have to go all Oprah on this one. Communicate. Tell your spouse you don't want to be tired all the time. You don't want to hurt all the time. You don't want to wake up with diabetes or not wake up due to heart attack...and your willing to do all the work, but you need some serious support and understanding.

If that doesn't work, try promising him more time in bed once you lose a couple of pounds.

You might just lead with that one.

Good luck!
 
I've tried those. He actually has diabetes. I explained, very nicely, that I needed support and love through this or I wasn't going to make it. He made promises that after a week or so faded. Promising more bedroom time didn't work I'm the one that always wants bedroom time he's the one that NEVER wants it and turns me down. Which of course makes me feel more like a failure.
 
Everyone has the right to eat what they want but your hubby should have his treats when your not around to make it easier for you and offer you more support.
I guess I'm super lucky as my hubby hates sweet things and the bad foods he likes... I hate lol
So if he's munching away on stinky cheese and patè I'm not tempted in the least. If there chocolate in the fridge, and it goes quickly its obviously me that ate it all.
If he has diabetes though, he should be careful of what's he's eating.
 
He's is overweight as well as diabetic. I have learned I can't "make" him do the right things for his body. All I can do is the right things for my body. Hopefully lead by example. I just wish I can get the support I need instead of him being a food tease.
 
I'm fresh out of ideas.

When you're dieting, having someone come sit next to you and start eating is god-awful. My kids do it without thinking...I'll get up and leave the room over it. I don't think anyone that hasn't been hungry can know how hard it is to be hungry, watch other people eat, and not eat yourself. It's impossible for me.

I just leave. Not a great solution, I admit.

Phil
 
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