Tate's Diary

Tate1

Tate1

New member
-- How much weight do you want to lose?
50 lbs.

-- What is the timeframe for reaching your target weight?
Before the new year.

-- How do you want to accomplish your goal (what methods do you want to use)?
Diet, exercise, support, eating right, and changing my lifestyles.
I don't want to entirely cut out certain things that I truly love (like sweets) but I want to have a better control over them.

-- Who or what can support you in reaching your goal?
Being honest with myself about what I want. Anyone who is going through the same thing and knows what it is like to think, "I can be doing better."

-- How realistic is your goal?
I think it's extremely realistic.

-- When will you start?
I have! :)

This is my journal, I'm basically going to cover everything.
The whole blood and guts! :eek: Haha.
 
September 11, 2006

This entry is a bit late (it's already 4 AM here), so it's actually the 12th.
But... I wanted to write down some of what I dealt with on the 11th.

Bad day, brings up a lot of shaky memories. But then on the positive side, America is still standing and I think we've gotten closer as a country.
But I won't be political in my weight loss diary.

I woke up at around 2(am) because my (indoor) dogs were barking at the late-night trash collectors, aka racoons. (NOTE: Never have more than one chihuahua).

After not being able to go back to sleep, I read some blogs, browsed and popped open the guilty soda can. "Pop" (I'm a Mt. Dew-holic) is one of the most difficult things for me to drop. Heh, I rhymed.

I decided to look for a weight forum, somewhere to keep track of everything and I luckily found this. I feel really good about it.

50 lbs. may sound easy to someone with a bigger goal weight loss, but to me, it's hard enough losing 1 lb.

I'm glad I'm giving myself a reality check at 24 and not 44.
I don't want to be unhealthy and unhappy if I make it to 44.
And I feel unhealthy and unhappy at 24, so it's all wonky.

But I'm trying to be positive and my grocery date (since my decision of starting a healthier diet) is coming up soon.
I have a grocery list that I'll upload soon... it's full of wonderful, healthy food that I should have been buying years ago.

It'll be a weird experience passing up the usual items.

Habits are hell.
 
welcome to your diary...glad you found us... and you're correct.. now's the time to get yourself to where you want to be.. it's a bit harder when you're older... but you've got so many good tims ahead of you.. you want to be happy with yourself to enjoy them

some habits are hell... but it takes 21 days to build a habit, so you can always create yourself some new habits that aren't hell.

welcome welcome and look forward to reading more from you
 
September 12, 2006

Today was very trying.
Here are my misadventures.

I got a call back from an important hospital job on short notice for an interview tomorrow at 1:00 pm.

Thrilled, since it had been weeks since I put an application in... I raced through my closet at about 9:40 am (after little sleep, see post above) to find something to wear. I start early.

Even when I'm thin, I have a naturally broad chest/shoulders/build. And so that I'm overweight, it's a lot more messier.

Every shirt I tried on looked blowzy and terrible. Poofed out around the sides and under the arms, the chest all irregular. The pants were all too tight.
I tried not to let it set me back so much - so I showered, ate breakfast:

Breakfast:
1 cup oatmeal
1/2 cup raisins
1 cup orange juice
1 cup ice water

and headed out to the mall. I decided to get some walking in, so I parked as far away from the mall as I could on the opposite side of where I wanted to go. Good idea!

I wasn't sweating that bad once inside, but I did feel a little damp and out of breath. I don't care.

Then I hit the stores.

And this is where everyone will draw a collective sigh.

Nothing fit there, either.

I had to go in and out of the dressing room. My normal "fat" sizes weren't even working in certain types of clothes. Khakis have always been hard for me to pull off, skinny or fat.

But the dress shirts were just humiliating.

I'm standing in the middle of a dressing room - staring at my puffy chin in the mirror, my awful looking shirt and pants, and almost losing it.
Dress shirts seem to accentuate male's love handles, and I'm no exception.

As the tears began to well up... I told myself it was ridiculous to lose control at this point, when I'm on the path to do well.

I finally found the right outfit, an hour or so later.
But I couldn't help it. I felt like crap. And even though no one was watching me, I felt like everyone in the department was fitting into their clothes fine and loving it - I saw two college-age guys (my age group) trying on designer shoes with their perfectly proportionate bodies.

It sucks.

I skipped lunch because I got caught up going from place to place to look for the right tie.

And I was too depressed to walk when I got back, plus it was raining.

I felt like MORE crap that I let this minor setback get to me.

But hey, it happens, right?
To the best of us.

This is a lot harder than I thought.
 
You're right - it is harder then we thought.

And sometimes, it isn't.

Any one of us has been where you were in that dressing room.
It sucks.

But!...

Those pounds DO come off. We Do start making life changes that will keep us at our goal weight once we get there.

You ARE on the right track.

Remember, try not and skip meals - if you get too hungry, you're more likely to over eat or make less then healthy choices when you do eat (speaking from far more experience then I care to admit) ;)

You'll beat this!
 
you wanna have some real dressing room fun.. try on a swimsuit in winter.. in a dressing room with flurescent lights and pasty white skin... hang in there, kiddo, hard work will get you where you want to be...

don't be so down on yourself... you're cute... dressing room mirrors make supermodels look icky..

if you want some motivation for the next few weeks. come sign up for the halloween challenge.. it'll be fun...
 
I know all about the dressing room blues, I've cried my puffy eyes out in more than one. The important thing is that you recognize that you want to change and you are taking steps to do it. Great job! As far as the soda goes, try switching to water, and once you've had your eight cups or so a day then you can reward yourself with a diet soda...thats how I've been handling the pepsi withdrawl...strangly with diet coke because diet pepsi is reminiscent of mold spore...
Anyways, keep it up. If you need late night motivation there is no better place then Maleficents journal...but don't tell her I told you that.
 
How'd the interview go?
It doesn't take much before those clothes start to fit. the thing to remember is consistency. Consistently eat breakfast and consistently don't skip meals. Consistently get your workout/walk/exercise in. I don't have the withdrawal from soda, I'd been on diet for years. Since I started however, I rarely drink diet even anymore. My vice, half a pot of coffee and hazelnut creamer everyday. Hey, you gotta keep something you enjoy! Good Luck!!
 
Tate-

Couple of things.

1. After about a week of choking it down after switching from regular, Diet Mt Dew is pretty good.

2. 50 pounds by the new year is really agressive. If you don't make it, don't get too down on yourself. That said, is my goal too! LOL
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top