Self-Esteem

I have been on the forum for a minute or two, and in that time I have seen many, many posts about self-confidence and self esteem in regard to weight loss. Almost every post has been that with weight loss comes greater confidence. I’m not trying, by any means, to say that’s untrue, but I thought the whole self esteem question deserved some further thought.

I haven’t lost a lot of weight yet, but I don’t feel like I lack self-esteem or self-confidence for the most part. So when I lose 30 pounds I’ll be overconfident and start displaying signs of hubris (and, therefore, my own downfall)? What if I lose weight and feel the self esteem increase, then get sick or something and gain weight back. Will it decrease? Is high self-esteem necessary for weight loss or a mere result of it? What’s the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence, anyway?

So this is what I found (the definition of self confidence came from Princeton and everything else came from Wikipedia Self-esteem - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia).

Self-confidence is “assurance, freedom from doubt, belief in yourself and your abilities.” Since these things can be easily shaken, I’m going to assume that self-confidence is more how you feel right now in regard to yourself (as opposed to overall).

Self-esteem is harder to define. I know because there are three trillion different definitions in the article. To start, self esteem “is the overall self appraisal of someone’s own worth. It encompasses beliefs and emotions and can show itself through behavior.”

“Psychologists usually regard self-esteem as an enduring personality characteristic (trait self-esteem), though normal, short-term variations (state self-esteem) occur.”

So it refers to long term or short term depending on what you’re thinking when you use the term. The other neat thing I found was this:
“According to the "Contingencies of Self-Worth model" (Crocker & Wolfe, 2001) people differ in their bases of self-esteem. Their beliefs — beliefs about what they think they need to do or who they need to "be" in order to class as a person of worth — form these bases. Crocker and her colleagues (2001) identified six "domains" in which people frequently derive their self-worth, including:

1. virtue
2. support of family
3. academic competence
4. physical attractiveness
5. gaining others' approval

Individuals who base their self-worth in a specific domain (such as, for example, academic success) leave themselves much more vulnerable to having their self-esteem threatened when negative events happen to them within that domain (such as when they fail a test at school). A 2003 study by Crocker found that students who based their contingency of self-worth on academic criteria had a greater likelihood of experiencing lower-state self-esteem, greater negative affect, and negative self-evaluative thoughts when they did not perform well on academic tasks, when they received poor grades, or when graduate schools rejected them (Crocker, Karpinski, Quinn, & Chase, 2003; Crocker, Sommers, & Luhtanen, 2002).

While it doesn’t answer all the questions I have regarding self-esteem’s relationship with weight loss, #4 sure does look like it says physical attractiveness, but it’s only one of 6 common places where people get their esteem. While I may be more confident on a typical day and have more self esteem overall when I lose weight, I’ll still have several other areas to work on and/or be proud of myself about when it’s gone.

Moral: Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
 
Almost every post has been that with weight loss comes greater confidence

I always cringe when I see that... yes, some people might have a bit more confidence in themselves... I talked about this recently -where my own personal situation that with weight loss has come a lot less confidence in myself because i've become far more visible... and people tend to have higher expectations of you - no one has any real expectations of the fat girl...

I know what my good qualities are.. I know I'm relatively smart (when i choose to engage my brain), I know I've got a good sense of humor (though often misunderstood), I know what the good stuff is - but it takes effort to remind myself of them - laziness makes me focus on the stuff I know needs work.

#4 was my major reason for losing weight... I was relatively healthy - just hated what I looked like -I look a little better now.. but I still don't like what I look like... but I don't expect losing more weight to change that... I'm far too realistic to ever look at myself and say damn you look gorgeous... I won't... ever...I will however... look as good as I can possibly be...

at some point in the past year - my mindset changed from what I looked like - I think reality set in and told me -hey you're not 25, you'll never be 25 again, move on... you're you... So I really started to focus on what i could do and changed my focus on my own performance... and that does stymie me frequently because i always think I should be doing better than I am... Lack of satisfaction and always wanting what's next is what drives me forward...

I'm rambling -this is aninteresting subject - of which I genrally have coherant thoughts on - I'm not sure they're coming out today
 
to me my self esteem ,got really low seeing my weight get so high ,and knowing how people must view me,
to get to a weight better for me ,wife children ,and better for my health ,and being able to look in the mirror and be happy with my apperance
with the loss of each pound i feel so much better
 
I didn't read the whole post...but tthe whole "weight loss = more selfesteem" doesn't really work for me. It's the control, probably exactly as Wiki describes "assurance, freedom from doubt, belief in yourself and your abilities." I get a boost of selfesteem when I have the ability to lose weight, to get an 'A' on a huge paper, basically when I do something that I know I did well in. I guess I get my selfesteem from my confidence to do something well.

I used to think that I felt better because I was thinner, but after gaining a measly 6lbs (ok, 10lb, i lost 4 thus far) I realised how miserable I was that I couldn't obtain that goal. It doesn't matter that my pants are only a little snug, it's the fact that I once succeded, but now I cannot.

But then again, selfesteem is completely subjective. Everyone is going to be different, I doubt anyone is a control freak like me (ok maybe they are, but they don't have to admit it ;) )
 
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