Project Confidence: Losing the weight, getting healthy and rebuilding my confidence..

saramaria124

New member
What is your current height and weight?
5'7" and approximately 235 lbs
If you were at an ideal weight now, what would that weight be?
150 lbs
At what weight would you like to be at four months from now?
220 lbs
Why do you want to lose weight?
Regain my health, my body confidence, and become more active
Do you want to lose weight for a specific life event such as wedding or reunion? If so, when is that event?
My 27th birthday in April.
What obstacles could get between you and your weight loss goals?
Time- I work two jobs, three if you count the babysitting, and school. I need to start building up my metabolism.
Why do you think that you now have a weight problem?
I grew up in the fast food era....I ate and worked in fast food for years, and I didn't exercise. I would start off well and then something would happen and I would start to eat and gain. I was an emotional eater.
What lifestyle changes do you think would help you lose weight?
Cutting out soda's and coffee, portion control, walking more, exercise, daily confidence exercises.
Have you lost weight in the past? If so, what has worked in the past to help you lose weight?
I was working out with a personal trainer, and was working at a gym, so I really had no excuse to not work out after my shift.
Why do you believe that you did not lose weight or you gained the weight back?
Working two jobs, and lack of time and sleep and energy. My schedule now is a lot more flexible with the two jobs I have rather than when I was at the gym and working in retail. Because I did not exercise I didn't get rid of calories and I started drinking too much coffee.
What, if anything, has not worked for you in the past in helping you to lose weight? Why do you think it did not work?
I found the no carb diets didn't work for me all that well. I would start it and then crave them so badly that when I started reinstating them I went overboard.
Would you try writing down all food and drink consumed for a given period of time?
I would try it would just depends on how busy I am on any given day and what my schedule is like.
Do you cook at home often? If so, what do you cook?
I don't cook often, but I make wholewheat pasta's and soups.
How often do you go out to eat? Where do you go?
I have been trying to cut down, but I used to go out almost 5 days a week, and have cut it down to one.
What are your three favorite foods?
Thai curries and rice, Pasta's, Chinese food.
What are your three favorite restaurants?
Imperial Buffet, Thai on the Danforth and Wendy's.
What are three things you can do differently when it comes to food?
Use portion control, particularly with pasta's (as well as eating pasta with tomato based sauces rather than cream based), Eat more vegetables and cooking more at home rather than eating out.
If you woke up tomorrow and your body was exactly the way you want it, what would be different?
I would hope that my eating habits would have changed, my metabolism was higher and healthier, and I do not have to deal with the many ailments that run in my family, such as diabetes, heart problems and cancer.
Do you eat when you are not hungry?
I try to eat only when I'm hungry, but I tend to overeat sometimes.
Do you binge eat (large amounts at a time)?
I used to emotionally eat and completely binge. My first break up I went to the food court at the shopping centre and got food from four different places and ate it all in one go. I haven't been doing that lately.
Do you hide your food or eat in secret?
Not anymore. I used to.
Do you eat when you are sad, nervous, or depressed?
I used to but that has been something I have been working on. I've been trying to replace bad behaviours (overeating) with good behaviours (going for a walk when I'm angry).
Do you eat as a reward?
Not so much anymore. I used to.
Do you eat while watching TV or using the computer?
On the rare occasion yes, but again I have been trying to stop that.
What do you normally eat for a meal?
Pastas and soups and salads.
What type of snacks do you eat?
I don't eat a lot of snacks, mainly the three meals a day.
In terms of exercise, what, if anything, are you currently doing?
Walking.
Where do you go for exercise? A local public gym? School/work gym? Home?
I have a gym membership that I haven't been using very often.
What, if anything, are your three favorite types of exercise?
Cardio, dance, ab exercises.
What is your daily/weekly/monthly/yearly motivation to move towards your goals?
Exercise daily, drink more water, exercise portion control...eating breakfast regularly. My weekly goal would be to lose a pound a week, 5 lbs a month and by the time of my birthday....40 lbs or more.
Do you have rewards for certain goals?
A new wardrobe or a trip to a tropical destination and being able to wear a bikini and look and feel good.
 
So I didn't exactly start out the day well. I was doing an overnight shift at my shelter job and forgot to bring my prepared food so I went across and got two breakfast burrito's from macdonalds....going to try and be better the rest of the day and I'm also going to try and feel better since my nose is all plugged up and am coughing a lot....wish me luck.
 
Welcome back...

and since yu cant change what you did - all you can do is the best you can going forward... which you're doing... so good job :)

Hope your nose unplugs and you're feeling better...
 
Thank you so much for the welcome back. I'm looking forward to getting into this again. It helped me out a great deal last time.
 
So yesterday didn't go so well. I wasn't feeling well and so I fell back on old faithfuls...I had pasta for lunch, when I woke up, and then a green vegetable curry and rice for dinner...could have done better, but I will try today. I have some leftover pasta so I may take it for lunch but work on eating a healthier dinner. I am doing two shifts at two different places today...I'll be working from around 8:45 am to 11 pm. Fun times....
 
Welcome :)

Dont get so stressed out about some bad decisions every day is a new day! Just keep confident and optimistic and things should fall into place!

--Mariah <3
 
Hey there!

I see a lot of myself in the things your writing. Keep a positive outlook and continue becoming more aware of the foods you eat and your body in general. I'm sure you'll do great in this journey! I'm looking forward to hearing about your successes. :)
 
Ok so today I had a breakfast burrito that I made at home before I left for work with a bottle of water. I missed out on lunch at work, but I had a few small snacks to tide me over....nutrigrain bar, and some rice cakes. And then for dinner my friend made me some of his mac and cheese, and I had one small portion with two glasses of water. Exercise wise, not a lot done today. I went for a 20 minute walk from work to the bus stop and then another 20 minute walk once I got home. Just need to start working on getting back into the gym full force again.
 
So these are my goals when it comes to weight loss and regaining my health:

- No more drinking soft drinks and lessening my coffee intake.
- Drink lots of water every day.
- Eating more protein and varying my dietary intake.
- Learn to cook healthier meals.
- Exercise everyday...cardio 4 times a week for half an hour to fourty five minutes.
- Weight training twice a week.
- Eating out less.

My motivation to lose the weight......so many reasons...

- Diabetes, heart problems and cancer all run in my family...both sides.
- I want to regain my self confidence again. I have customers at my store who tell me all the time that it looks like I've been losing weight....I can't tell....I feel like I'm gaining and I still feel like I'm huge.
- To be comfortable in my own skin.
- To go back into the dating world confident and not having to worry about attracting 'feeders' and 'chubby chasers'.
- To make my mom and dad proud of me. My dad and I haven't had the best relationship always because he's always been really concerned about my weight but showed it in really backhanded ways...critical comments that he thought might motivate me to lose it...which instead made me want to eat...funny that...
- To be able to shop in stores that are not plus size.

One of my biggest frustrations, especially being at this weight is dating. I have a terrible record for meeting the wrong guys at the wrong time. I've dated abusers, cheaters, indifferent, jealous....my last ex was a nice guy until a point....and then I started to get weird because I was not used to being treated well and I freaked and as all things do, they end and not in a positive way.
I have never been in love, and I would love to know what that feeling is like. I think I find it hard to let people love me. Maybe because I don't feel like I'm pretty or worth it sometimes. There are times where I will feel fantastic and then I hear some guy say 'why do all the hot girls always have to have the token fat friend?' or 'Someone should lay off the fast food...'. When you hear negativity too often, you start to believe it and its hard to switch off that nagging feeling. I was on dating websites but took myself off because I was just getting messages such as 'nice rack' or I got married men wanting someone to cheat with or feeders, who get off on watching women gain weight. I got so sick of it.
I want to be with someone who wants to be with me or me, for all my goofiness, and randomness. I want to have that intimacy with someone.

Anyhow, sorry to ramble...just have been feeling like talking to someone and well, I don't have many people I can openly discuss it with.
 
So I got rather annoyed last night with some friends of mine after a disagreement and went to the local Shoppers and got myself a tub of ice cream that I immediately dug into......for me, that would be falling back on prior bad habits. My sister noticed my bad mood and was trying to talk to me about the problem, but all I was interested in was the ice cream. Eventually she tried again and she took away the ice cream but not before I started to feel like crap as per usual. Will be on later.
 
I want to be with someone who wants to be with me or me, for all my goofiness, and randomness.
That's a great want in someone... and what everyone deserves... Knowing how to find it in yourself helps as well..

Not that there's anything wrong with ice cream... but going forward.. since you recognized that you were annoyed with some friends... was "punishing" yourself with icecream in your best interest? How would you have handled it differently should it come up again?

Hope you have a better day today...
 
Hello, I just saw your thread here and wanted to say hello. Well some advice I can offer is to stay positive as much as possible. I was depressed a few years ago and then one day I realised I can't let things bring me down. I needed to know I could face life head on and really truelly allow myself to be happy. Take out your negetive thoughts and replace them with positive ones. One way to do that is to try and find the positive in every situation.
 
Hi and welcome :)

Hey, thanks for the encouraging post in my photo journal. That was really sweet. Looks like we have about the same starting weight and goal weight. I think the hardest part is getting going. Once you do that, the habits will form and if you're anything like me, you'll get obsessed! That's what it takes for me anyway. I have to become completley obsessed and focused or else I get bored and quit. Anyway, I'm glad you're here and look forward to being on this journey with you. ~Kristi~
 
I know exactly how you feel in the love department. I was moleted when I was a child, and it ruined my self-esteem. Also when I meet guys, I get scared and would push them away. I was so afraid of getting hurt, I would hurt them first. I found that having some really great friends that I can talk to about anything had helped me. Right now I do not have any negative friends. Even though they might have problems, they are not negative. This might sound silly, but waking up in the morning with a post-it note on the mirror with positive affirmation.... good thing. Even better if you can look yourself in the face and say it to yourself! TTYL ~angie~
 
One of my biggest frustrations, especially being at this weight is dating. I have a terrible record for meeting the wrong guys at the wrong time. I've dated abusers, cheaters, indifferent, jealous....my last ex was a nice guy until a point....and then I started to get weird because I was not used to being treated well and I freaked and as all things do, they end and not in a positive way.
I have never been in love, and I would love to know what that feeling is like. I think I find it hard to let people love me. Maybe because I don't feel like I'm pretty or worth it sometimes. There are times where I will feel fantastic and then I hear some guy say 'why do all the hot girls always have to have the token fat friend?' or 'Someone should lay off the fast food...'. When you hear negativity too often, you start to believe it and its hard to switch off that nagging feeling. I was on dating websites but took myself off because I was just getting messages such as 'nice rack' or I got married men wanting someone to cheat with or feeders, who get off on watching women gain weight. I got so sick of it.
I want to be with someone who wants to be with me or me, for all my goofiness, and randomness. I want to have that intimacy with someone.

Anyhow, sorry to ramble...just have been feeling like talking to someone and well, I don't have many people I can openly discuss it with.

First and foremost, Let me apologize on behalf of the male of the species... Believe it or not, we are not all like that!!! However, there are enough of us out there who are insensitive jerks (unfortunately), that the rest of us get reputations because of it....

My wife was one of the people who had been victimized by some of those types. It took her a while to realize that I was not one of them. It took patience on my part too. In the end, we have been married now for 21 years... HAPPILY!!!

It sucks that you have had negative experiences with men. I think you are going about it the right way when it comes to building up your self confidence by changing your lifestyle some ****However**** Do not change who you are, just because you're looking for Mr. Right. The real Mr. Right should be interested in you for you. Make the changes that you want to make for YOU, nobody else!!
 
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Hi everyone,
Maleficient:
Usually I am really good with not doing the binging on ice cream....I usually go for a walk instead of binging. I've been working on it for so long, but the day that this happened I was in a great deal of pain with pain in my back, my hips and my lower stomach and walking didn't seem like the best option, though I really should have done it anyway. I need to recognize that when I'm feeling like that that I have to stop the temptation to binge.

Angie:
I was also molested as a child but I was molested by a female friend of my parents whom always used to babysit us and so I have found it hard to be friends with females at times, but I'm a lot better at it, but I also tend to be awkward with men now because of it.

Reluctantcabbie:
I know all men are not like these guys, its just hard when I hear things like that. And believe me I don't want to change myself for men.....I want to change my weight because of my health and etc. I find that with men I tend to act differently, for example, my most recent ex boyfriend I didn't let myself be goofy and outgoing, I always tended to be introverted. I think that's a sign that he definitely wasn't the right guy for me, because he would always look at me weirdly when I did have one of my random goofy moments.
 
If you can't be yourself then there is a problem. I think the only way to trully be happy is to be real to yourself and let others around you know who you really are.
 
Your right. I stayed in the relationship a lot longer than I should have. It wasn't a healthy relationship because I didn't feel comfortable being like that around him. He used to glare at me when I acted the slightest bit goofy or outgoing, but I stayed. I can say now that I'm happier without him and Im doing a lot better.
 
. I can say now that I'm happier without him and Im doing a lot better.
Atta girl.. I mean atta-woman :D

I've seen too many people stay in relationships that weren't healthy because the person(of both genders) though someone was better than being alone...

Having someone to appreciate your goofiness is a beautiful thing -and those people do exist :D
 
Your right. I stayed in the relationship a lot longer than I should have. It wasn't a healthy relationship because I didn't feel comfortable being like that around him. He used to glare at me when I acted the slightest bit goofy or outgoing, but I stayed. I can say now that I'm happier without him and Im doing a lot better.

I can relate. Before I started dating my husband (way back when), I had a pattern of bad relationship choices, and staying in them way too long.

Stay away from the ones that handle a bit of silliness... test them early and often. If they don't like random goofiness, its not meant to be. :willy_nilly:
 
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