Obsessed with food!

[mami to two]

I made an intro thread with some of my stats but here they are again. Im 23, i am a mother of 2 (4y/o and 15m/o). Im 5'3 and i weigh somewhere between 190 and 200, which is a huge shock to me. I went from 135 when i got pregnant with #1 to almost 200lbs in 4 years. I know a big part is having my children. With baby #1 i had pre-eclampsia so from 135 to 195 about 30lbs in the last 2 months. Then with baby #2 i went from 150 to 205 at birth.. then down to 181 when i first started the gym.

i joined the gym and was m-f an hour to 1.5 hrs a day. 45 minutes on the treadmill walking with slight incline and then just doing random machines. I did try one class.. i about died. lol. After about 2 months i think i didnt see any change in the scale.. said 181 the whole time.. but my clothes fit the same if not a little bit better. Size 17 in jrs. (i refuse to move on to ladies lol). I was disappointed! very discourage. then i came here and read.. muscle weighs more fat weighs less.. duh to me!

well its been about 8 months since iv been to the gym (financial reasons) and i went from 181 to 200. for various reason i know! i started two medications for depression and bipolar, wellbutrin and depakote er, within a couple of weeks being on the meds.. i was hungry 24/7.. one of the side effects.. increased appetite.. go figure.. i called my dr because im having many more side effects like excessive bruising and tremors. so hopefully we can find an alternative to depakote.

im a lover of any fast food.. but i am completely obessed with publix subs.. whole.. white bread, turkey, lettuce, tomato, black olive, onions, lots and lots of jalapinos, salt, pepper and i ask for alot of oil and vinegar because i like the bread to get soggy.. i also eat a hass avacado with little bit of evoo and salt everyday.. i know i shouldnt but i honestly never had these feelings like this towards food untill i was put on these meds. lol i always ate alot but never like this its almost trippled in size of the food and how many times i eat..

iv been reading a few things on the site.. very very good information. thank you for that.. i plan to start searching some more tomorrow.. but i was wondering if anyone else has ever delt with something like this.. mentally i feel wonderful on this medication, and i know i can be switched to another with the same mental effect but alot of them have the same side effects.. incresed appetite being my #1 concern..

i would just like some tips on how i can resist food.. i sit infront of the tv and watch foodnetwork.. should see my favs folder fn.com recipes all over.. lol i dont even know where im going with this anymore. i need help some how. and im just reaching out to some knowledgeable people. i know i can be very lazy at times.. with whats been going on in my life right now i dont have the will to do anything much then just make sure my kids are ok and thats it..

any and all comments and questions are welcome.. thank you so much for reading my sob story.. and sorry if any words are messed up lol i tried correcting what i could as i went alot.. very shaky tonight!

Jaime

 

[thoughtsfropete]

Hello,

Well, it sounds like you have some digging to do, I think it is really important that you find the strength now to turn your weight around as judging by your height and weight, it is no longer an aesthetic for you, you will be placing pressure on your internal system, from your organs to your health overall.

Your entire success right now lays in your emotional intelligence and your mental strength. I am happy that you feel good on your meds, however, I don't want to sound harsh, but it looks from an external point of view that you are aware that your medications give you a greater appetite but you have now come to accept this fact and it has become a personal excuse for you to "not do something."

First step - Is fully taking responsibility that your thoughts are still your own, you absolutely have to run the movie in your mind forward of your life to a place where if you do not do enough to change it around that it start affecting your heath. From there, ask yourself, do I want the ailments that will most certainly come if I do not take full accountability now for my weight?

Second step - Whatever you resist will only persist. Whenever you get a craving for fast food, you absolutely need to have something healthy close by that you eat instead of the fast food, but do not eat it out of "ugghhh I have to eat this," you absolutely need to attach a good feeling to eating healthier!!!!!! - this is called emotional intelligence, you get to choose the emotions that you attach to all areas of your life. The big problem at the moment is that you stated that you LOVE certain take outs... Let me ask you, doesn't it seem strange to feel PASSIONATELY about take out's? Will that be helping your health? Absolutely NOT!! - You choose a massive amount of your emotions and I want you to instead of trying to RESIST the take out, let the movie run of take out in your mind but then run the movie to the point where you start to feel sick because of the toxic poisons that are going into your body, destroying your internal organs, sludge being stored around your fat cells and the feeling of sheer vomit because you ate a take out... You with me? Then, ask yourself, right, what is a healthy choice? that is when you need good food right next to you!!!!!!!

Third step - find the stronger person that you are. Inside you, there is a emotionally and mentally stronger person, it's still you, but just a part of you that you have probably locked away over the years and there is no better time than right now to call upon that person to come and help you out!! Start making stronger decisions about your health, remember, you are driven by pain and pleasure so you have to start attaching PAIN to the bad in your life and PLEASURE to the good things in your life.

You know what, take out you have pleasure attached to it, coz it tastes good etc etc etc, but it is not helping your health, use the above example to attach pain to discusting, gross and body destroying take out and massively start to attach pleasure to feeling good!!!

Your mind and body will only help you to lose weight when you feel good about losing weight, many people still feel so bad when they think they have all this weight to lose that their subconscious basically says "well, you feel bad about that so I am certianly not going to help you to do it." YOU HAVE TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT LOSING WEIGHT AND BEING FIT, HEALTHY ETC!

Ok, I think that's enough for now, let me know, I guarantee you that you can lose the weight, you just have to really really want to and believe that you can.

Pete

 

[mami to two]

Oh i reallly do want to do this. ill be looking forward to hearing more from you and everyone while i run around this site taking it all in. Thank you for your response im going to take it all in