Newcomer Jody (45F) is having trouble losing weight.

J

Jody

New member
AI'm brand new to this site, and will start looking around for tips and support.

But, just to introduce myself and explain my plight, here's a quick synopsis.

I'm A 45-year-old married woman and, until age 30, never weighed over 100lbs. In my 30s, I gradually went up to about 120...125 by my late 30s...which really was just the recommended weight for someone my height (5'4"). I felt a bit fat at that weight (given my history), but was uninspired to do anything about it.

Now, in my mud-40s, I've BALLOONED to over 160lbs. (That's 70lbs more than what I weighed 15 years ago!!!)

Two months ago, I earnestly started a weight loss strategy of eating less, and exercising vigorously. (I already ate a very healthy diet...just too much, I guess.) When I started, i was 160 even. Only once in the past 2 months have I gone below that figure (159.6).

I exercise for 1-2 hours every day (strenuously, too...I was always athletic as a younger person). I do a combination of aerobics plus treadmill, with weights every other day. In addition, I also do 60 min. routines of ballet, yoga, and pilates.

Oh, I also stopped eating after 7pm, 2 months ago.

Most confounding are the big weight gains (never a big weight loss, consarnit). One day I apparently gained 4lbs, and then 6, on another! I didn't even consume that much food and drink the previous day! (Isn't it the first rule of physics that matter can neither be created nor destroyed?) The surprising lack of weight loss, and daily jumps in weight led me to replace my old digital scale with a fancy, new one. But, alas, the erratic weight measurements are, evidently, not scale-related.

So, despite very few days missing a workout, and a relatively low caloric intake (easily half what I was eating before), I have not only failed to lose weight, but have GAINED (a nominal amount of) weight, instead.

Now I'm officially the fattest I've ever been in my life.

Thus, I'm here to try new things...because what I'm doin' ain't workin'.

If you've overcome a similar dilemma (especially if you're a woman closer to 50-years-old) please let me know how you did it! If you're having the same problem right now, feel free to offer some solidarity. I could use it!

I know when I was in my late 20s, and always weighed 97lbs without even trying, I would've told my future self to just eat less and exercise more. But, clearly, that alone is not working.

I haven't had my thyroid checked yet, but haven't felt any enlargement in the thyroid gland through manual palpation. Oh, and there are no signs I'm entering menopause, either.

Sorry...that wasn't a very short synopsis. But that's my predicament. :)
 
Welcome Jody! Lisa is another new member. I wouldn't suggest some of what she use to have posted there. I much better (and non-rule violating idea) is to read many of the diaries on this website for inspiration as well as the sticked posts for a way towards a start.


Let me put something to rest though. The human body's weight swings a great deal during a day. This is why it is highly suggested that you only weigh yourself once a week to get a more realistic weight picture.


Second, and this is hard for some to hear..but it comes down to calories in vs calories out. You can work out till your legs fall off but your calorie intake is where it really is. We tend to vastly underestimate our calorie intake even if we swear we don't. Thing is, the body doesn't lie that much. It has to be getting it from somewhere. So time to be brutally honest with yourself. Start with a food diary. For one week, write everything you eat and I do mean EVERYTHING. It is the only way you can get a real picture of where to start. Just be honest and dedicated. There is a great section here for you to write it out if you wish.


Above all, have faith and have patience. You don't need schemes (coughlisacough) to lose weight.
 
AThanks for the welcomes!

I'm still trying to see what this site has to offer. I'm reading the stories, and considering which strategies I might try. I have to do something different...obviously.

I have been keeping a food and activity diary. Those who've seen it suggest either I'm not eating enough or I'm exercising too much. (That doesn't hold water for me because I still should've lost some weight. I mean, if I start running a marathon everyday, there's no way I won't lose weight, right? If I just stop eating entirely, I'll eventually lose weight, right? Then again, a few years ago, I was deathly ill with salmonella poisoning. I didn't eat anything for 7 days, then only ate crackers and tea for the following 3 days. The next time I weighed myself, I was the same weight. So, if I did lose any weight, it was minimal.)

As I said, when I was always 97lbs from, say, age 16-30, without doing anything to try to maintain that weight, I would've told my future self to eat less and exercise more. When I was 120lbs and in my 30s, I would likely have said the same thing, even though I, myself, was maintaining my weight without cutting calories or exercising. But, as I close in on 50, I read so many stories of women my age who can't shift a pound. I'm generally a pretty positive person, but I had a breakdown one day. Through tears, I pleaded to my husband, "Sure, some of those people are lying about how much they eat or exercise....but not all of us. You see how little I eat, and how hard I work out. I'm not cheating or skimping or taking it easy, and I haven't lost even a pound!!!"

That was a bad day. Just thinking about it almost brings me to tears.

I'm glad I've been weighing myself in the same circumstances every day (after morning workout but before shower, naked), so I'm comparing apples to apples. If, at the beginning, I'd gone a week of eating less, never eating after 7pm (which had probably been when I ate MOST, prior to this), and exercising so much, and saw the same weight or more on the scale, I'd probably have given up. It's the knowledge that these 1-5lb fluctuations seem to have nothing to do with what I ate or how much or little I exercise, is what keeps me searching for the right combination for me.

Do you get what mean? For example, the ONE time I weighed a half pound below my starting weight, came after an off day (too depressed...didn't workout, but didn't binge either...I just had some french fries and a veggie burger my husband brought home for me). Once or twice in there, I went the whole day without eating, and the scale recorded a higher weight the next morning. One day, the scale indicated I'd gained 6 lbs from the previous day, and I'd hardly eaten anything the day before...nowhere close to six pounds of food and drink. That's why this is so confounding. How can my weight increase by more than what I've consumed?

Purely joking (my husband and I have a great time, cracking jokes), he asked, "Have you been pooping?" We had a good chuckle at the prospect I wasn't losing weight because I was...er..."backed-up." ;-)

I never intentionally skip meals. Food just isn't that important to me. I'd always been "the skinny one," partly because I am not a gourmand. I ate for fuel...and sometimes socially. Years ago, my sister and I both realized we could easily find ourselves going to bed, only then realizing we hadn't eaten anything that day. Eating was just such an after thought. But I did eat a fair amount of food most of the time...and that was a lot of fat and processed foods. I only started eating breakfast a few years ago...around the same time I started gaining weight.

In the years I've gained too much weight (say...age 39-45), I have been eating too much and have a very sdentary lifestyle. That's why I thought that it'd be a piece of cake to just exercise like I know I can, and cut calories (since I don't really care about food). But the formula is not working. It's been 2 months, and i'm trying different things. I'll try to focus on eating more protein for a week or two. When that isn't successful, I might try something else. When absolutely no strategy has resulted in even a pound of sustained (longer than 24 hrs) loss, I'm left frustrated, baffled, and trying to stay motivated.

There IS a combination of things out there that will work. I just hope it doesn't require running a marathon every day, or eating next to nothing. (The show 'Supersize vs. Superskinny' comes to mind. ...The superskinnies often -albeit unhealthfully- eating 1,000 calories or less.)

I believe the experts who say weight loss/maintenance is 80% diet.

Diary entry for Wednesday:

6AM: 90 min's aerobics & treadmill, weight machine and free weights

Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 slice of wholegrain toast w/tiny smear of margarine, small bowl of freshly-cubed pineapple & papaya, half glass of acai/pomegranate juice.

Snack: 6 celery sticks with spicy hummus (approx. 2-3 tbsp's)

Lunch: (missed)

Snack: apple

Dinner: udon soup and 4 spicy falafels my husband brought home for me, plus 2 squares of dark chocolate for "dessert".


Diary entry for Thursday:

6AM: 45 minutes treadmill, 30 minutes ballet (very light exercise day for me)

Breakfast: Irish oatmeal with 1 tsp of maple syrup, small bowl of freshly-cubed pineapple & papaya, half glass of acai/pomegranate juice.

Snack: 4 celery sticks, and a small glass of 'Green Goodness' juice blend.

Lunch: handful of pistachios, and small glass of tomato juice

Snack: banana

Dinner: leftover homemade spaghetti sauce on 1 cup (cooked volume) of whole grain pasta.


***if not specified, I'm drinking water. (I've always been a water drinker...not much for soda, juice, coffee, etc., most of the time.)

There is no "typical" day for me, in terms of food. I eat an extremely varied diet. Only the bowl of pineapple & papaya and acai/pomegranate juice at breakfast are common.

I mix-up my exercise routines, with some days being very intense, and others more yoga, ballet, or pilates. I'm considering upping that to twice a day, since I don't think I should eat any less, yet I'm still not losing weight.

I recently heard an interview with a guy who agrees that the "calories in/calories out" thing isn't quite what people make it out to be.

Myself, having now had this experience, my only theory is that my metabolism is slowing to match the caloric deficit.

When I was a thin 20-something, I had a friend who was also thin. Whereas I could care less about eating, and could easily forget to eat, she ate constantly, and tried unsuccessfully to gain weight. We figured that I likely had a naturally slower metabolism, but hers was much faster. Although we were the same size and neither of us was trying to maintain our weights, we just did...no matter what we ate.

Oh...I don't know... I've rambled long enough. There are so many little details I could share, but the net result is I'm eating what most people would consider relatively little, and working out what I think is a decent amount. Could I exercise more? Sure. Could I eat less? Sure. But I suspect it is the combination of food and lifestyle (rather than dedicated exercise) which is going to prove successful for me (short of finding out something stupid, like I have low thyroid levels o something out of m control). Deciphering that exact formula is proving to be the tricky part. If it was just eating less and exercising more, then I've done that already...in spades. Some people suggest that just not eating after 7PM should result in some weight loss. It hasn't.

I'm still on the hunt! :)
 
I can tell you that the after 7 thing is a bit of a myth. Yes, it's less calories consumed but not if you already went over your caloric levels earlier in the day. Studies shown that when you eat doesn't really have an effect. It's all about how much you eat.


and sorry, Lisa was banned for trying to sell her product on the site.
 
AOh, I just wanted to add that, while I'm very much keenly interested in any successful tips, advice, or camaraderie, I'm particularly interested in the successes of other women my age. There's just no denying that the female body wants to be 25% fat, and will even produce vital hormones in fat stores.

I mention this because my arguably spectacular husband decided he was going to try to lose a little weight, and started weighing himself. One weekend, we went to our cottage. At that time, I was innocently trying to lose weight by merely cutting calories fat, sugar, and salt. (I never lost a single pound then, either, and figured this time I would cut back even more, and exercise like a fiend....and surely that would make the difference...right?)

Over the weekend I rejected all the tasty offerings from the local restaurant where we had dinner. For dinner, I had a garden salad with balsamic vinegar for dressing, instead. Back at the cottage, I ate whole fruits, oatmeal, quinoa, clear soups, or a handful of nuts, here and there. I drank water or low sodium tomato juice.

My husband, on the other hand (who is massive, by the way)(big muscles burn more calories), "forgot" about his plan to lose some weight, and had things like chicken wings, and ribs. When we stopped for groceries on the way to the cottage, I noticed he'd bought Oreo cookies. He polished off the entire package in two days.

When we got home, we compared notes. I gained 2 lbs(!!!!!!!!!) while HE LOST 3 LBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'd sure love the chicken wing/rib/entire box of Oreos diet! Sounds awesome!

So...let's just say that my husband's body behaves considerably differently from mine, in this respect.

Oh, and I want to point out that I'm not assuming weight gain/loss is a 24hr clock. But, it's fascinating to see the fluctuations, from day to day, and week to week.
 
AThanks for the replies, Jericho. That's a shame about Lisa. She seemed nice enough, and while I didn't actually know what product she's accused of selling, I understand that if a person is doing that, it might inappropriate in this environment.

I am "open" to the idea of supplements but, I'm just not the pill taking kind, as it were. I don't even have aspirin in my house. I prefer whole foods and healthy eating as a means of staying healthy. I'm not saying I'll never try some supplement. And, in truth, the longer I go without any success, the closer I get to considering it. I just know that nearly all of my life, I've been slim no matter what I ate or how little activity I had. Something has changed over the past five or so years. I'm packing the weight on, and can't lose even a pound. My body is behaving nothing like it did in my 20s and 30s.
 
You just don't need that stuff. You know what i said about writing down what you eat? Do that. Hell, starting monday, I'm restarting up my food diary as well so why not come along then?
 
Hi, again, Jericho. :) I will move to new section now, since this is no longer an introduction. But I just wanted to post the last few (pretty typical) days of my food diary, to give you a better idea of what I'm talking about.


I mentioned the not eating after 7 thing because I'm both trying just about any strategy, and (the fact I mentioned) I probably consumed MOST of my calories after 7PM, prior to 2 months ago, when I started trying to lose weight. Without changing my daytime diet much at all, that SHOULD have resulted in weight loss, in and of itself, just by reducing the amount of calories I consumed over several weeks. Alas, no.


Anyway, in reviewing the last few days, I can see some "naughty" things...but in moderation, plus a few missed snacks and meals. <~~That's rather typical, albeit unintentional.


I find, overall, breakfast tends to be my most calorically-dense meal (although this is the first time in 2 months I've eaten eggs - I usually have oatmeal or quinoa. I only started having wholegrain toast about a week ago, when I re-read my 'Skinny Bitch' book, looking for some meal inspiration, and my husband asked if I would buy some bread.), and I'm eating celery sticks and juice as common snacks or lunch. Dinner tends to be my second biggest meal, it seems.


I really don't think I should be eating any less.



Friday Oct. 14, 2011



Weight: 164.7(?)



Breakfast: (missed)



Snack: (missed)



Lunch (2PM): can of maple beans (500 cal., 1.5g of fat)



Snack (3PM): 4 celery sticks plus a 3-serving beet juice drink (100ml, 60 cal.)



Dinner (6PM): 1 cup of curry lentil soup, a banana, small glass of tomato juice, 2 spicy falafels



After 7PM: (nothing)







Sat. Oct. 15, 2011



Weight: 162.1



Breakfast (@ restaurant): 3 eggs, 1 slice whole wheat toast, grapefruit juice



Snack: (missed)



Lunch: large glass of 'Grean Goodness' (approx. 500ml, 300 cal)



Snack: (missed)



"Dinner": small bowl of plain chips & 1/2 cup of french onion dip, plus 1/2 glass of soda



Dessert: 3 tbsp's of chocolate ice cream



After 7PM: (nothing)





Sun. Oct. 16, 2011



Weight: 162.7



Breakfast: 2 fried eggs, 1 piece wholegrain toast, equiv. of 1 small potato hash browns, coffee w/ cream & sugar



Snack: (missed)



Lunch: (missed)



Snack: (missed)



Dinner (4PM @ middle eastern restaurant): hummus (3 tbsp/<2 oz.) & wholegrain pita (1.2 saucer-sized pitas), small plate of steamed vegetables, approx. 300ml of mango juice



Dessert: 5 mini York peppermint patties (total 250 cal., 5g of fat)



After 7PM: (nothing -went to bed early @ 7:30)





Mon. Oct. 17, 2011



Weight: 163.8



Breakfast: 2 slices of wholegrain bread w/ peanut butter, plus coffee w/ cream & sugar, and 3-serving bottle of juice (beet) (100ml, 60 cal)



Snack: (missed)



Lunch: (missed)



Snack (2:30): I slice of wholegrain bread w/ blackstrap molasses, plus half glass of grapefruit juice



Snack (4:15): 4 celery sticks



...



All days had good hour+ workouts first thing in the morning. Yesterday I did a particularly brutal ballet regime over 90 min's. Today, I'm as fat as ever, at over 166lbs in my clothes. :-(



Oops! Gotta run! It's after 6 and I have to get some food in me! :) Looks like a cup of lentil soup and a half glass of low sodium tomato juice. U jelly? ;-) :)
 
Hi Jodie


I agree with everything Jericho has said.


I've not had too much weight to lose but i've gone down from a 34" waist to a 32" waist in less than 100 days so if I can do it you can do it.


I think the best thing would be firstly to calculate your BMR. There are calculators on the net to do this. They aren't 100% accurate but they can be used as a guidepost. Then you need to eat slightly less than BMR by for example 200 calories a day... I actually did this by fasting twice a week then eating at BMR for the rest of the week.


Try to keep a diary of the food you eat and add in a 10% varience as the calories that are usually advertised can vary e.g I count a 300 calorie blueberry muffin from Mcdonalds as 330 calories.


I don't do any high temp aerobics but I walk the dog everyday and lift weights which is important to maintain muscle mass whilst dieting.


Set yourself a goal and read it everyday for motivation.


Keep me posted.


Mark
 
Oh, and something I neglected to mention in my introduction...


In reading another post, I'm reminded to explain that I, too, have PCOS. (Was diagnosed over 25 years ago, so it's not the first thing on my mind.)


The very first/ most common side-effect associated with this condition is inability to lose weight. ...Something I'm not dwelling on, but may add more information as to why I'm not eating all that much, and working out hard, yet not losing weight. PCOS apparently also affects insulin production, which stimulates fat storage, thus leading to weight gain and an inability to lose weight for most PCOS sufferers. (although it ddn't have that effect on me from, say, age 16-39)


I did start concentrating on low GI foods, about a year or two ago. When I'm re-motivated, I keep a list of low GI foods on my fridge, to remind me to stay away from the foods which will spike my insulin levels. I am nowhere-near perfect, of course. And some foods in the moderate GI range are staples in my diet, for their other health benefits. And sometimes I just want something sweet. ;-)
 
Hey


Thanks for your response.


I'm not a medical expert so I couldn't advise you in this area.


I fast and when you fast insulin levels are natural kept low and is really the only time when you one is in fat loss mode.


It maybe worth something discussing with a medical person.


Keep me posted.


Mark
 
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