So, first of all...I'm new to this forum stuff, but my boyfriend suggested I try it out because it works good for his weight gaining and muscle building...
Well, I'm 20 years old and have been struggling with my weight for about 4 years or so. I'm on the shorter side, 5'3". I used to weigh 110-120lbs fluctuating between there (sorry if thats misspelled).
I am now at my highest weight at 192lbs. 3 years ago I reached my first highest point at 173lbs. I began working with a trainer (my grandma signed me up) and I was down to 155lbs, I felt pretty good about myself I guess.
I moved out of my grandmas house 400 miles away with my boyfriend (we wanted a fresh start in Southern California). I lost more weight, I was down to 140lbs...I guess I felt pretty good then to, we moved to a new apartment, I still felt good at my weight...
My boyfriend is 6'2", very skinny, struggle GAINING weight (lucky, eats 5,000 calories and barely gains weight...SMH!). He started a knew regimen to eat more, which led to junk food and a TON of food in the kitchen....Well, I started eating...and eating, eating, eating, and more eating....
Which of course brought me to where I'm at now, FAT, sorry...but it's true..And I'm not the type of person that is only fat in certain areas, I'm fat EVERYWHERE! I'm talking hands, feet, toes/fingers, stomach, ass, legs (my entire legs, including ankles), arms, face....my eyes are probably fat as well haha! have to laugh at it because its insane!
Well, I have been doing a lot of thinking and trying to recognize how my weight gain started again after I was doing so well...I eat, I don't even realize I'm eating half the time. I eat when I'm not hungry at all, like right now for example...I'm drooling for a bean, cheese, and rice burrito (my ultimate favorite food!!!) so sorry for going off track their.
I feel as though I have no will power or motivation. I work Mon-Fri 8am-5pm set permanent schedule, also occasional weekends, and 2x or more a week I work from 6pm-8am the next morning....So yes, I'm hardly ever home. I'm a Nanny if you were wondering, love my job [=.
So, this brings me to...When do I have time for the gym? Mornings, or evenings...I HATE waking up, I try everyday to rise and go to the gym in the morning...yep that hasn't happened ever. Evenings, I'm exhausted and usually left with headaches from crying babies and crazy toddlers. (I know, horrible excuses). Where do I find time to eat?? Well during my permanent weekday schedule, I get a 20 minute break...doesn't give me much time for a healthy meal...nights, can't cook for my boyfriend and myself because he won't eat my healthy choices...So, I don't cook hardly at all...Even though I'm good at it.
I guess it really comes down to commitment? And motivation to stick to a plan....But, I do feel stressed do to work. But i have to make money. Did I mention I suffer from depression? Have always since a child, but that...is a story of its own of course, but I do feel like that might be affecting my weight loss goals as well.
This post, is basically my "Diary" to help myself...To look back at when needed. Thanks?
Well, I'm 20 years old and have been struggling with my weight for about 4 years or so. I'm on the shorter side, 5'3". I used to weigh 110-120lbs fluctuating between there (sorry if thats misspelled).
I am now at my highest weight at 192lbs. 3 years ago I reached my first highest point at 173lbs. I began working with a trainer (my grandma signed me up) and I was down to 155lbs, I felt pretty good about myself I guess.
I moved out of my grandmas house 400 miles away with my boyfriend (we wanted a fresh start in Southern California). I lost more weight, I was down to 140lbs...I guess I felt pretty good then to, we moved to a new apartment, I still felt good at my weight...
My boyfriend is 6'2", very skinny, struggle GAINING weight (lucky, eats 5,000 calories and barely gains weight...SMH!). He started a knew regimen to eat more, which led to junk food and a TON of food in the kitchen....Well, I started eating...and eating, eating, eating, and more eating....
Which of course brought me to where I'm at now, FAT, sorry...but it's true..And I'm not the type of person that is only fat in certain areas, I'm fat EVERYWHERE! I'm talking hands, feet, toes/fingers, stomach, ass, legs (my entire legs, including ankles), arms, face....my eyes are probably fat as well haha! have to laugh at it because its insane!
Well, I have been doing a lot of thinking and trying to recognize how my weight gain started again after I was doing so well...I eat, I don't even realize I'm eating half the time. I eat when I'm not hungry at all, like right now for example...I'm drooling for a bean, cheese, and rice burrito (my ultimate favorite food!!!) so sorry for going off track their.
I feel as though I have no will power or motivation. I work Mon-Fri 8am-5pm set permanent schedule, also occasional weekends, and 2x or more a week I work from 6pm-8am the next morning....So yes, I'm hardly ever home. I'm a Nanny if you were wondering, love my job [=.
So, this brings me to...When do I have time for the gym? Mornings, or evenings...I HATE waking up, I try everyday to rise and go to the gym in the morning...yep that hasn't happened ever. Evenings, I'm exhausted and usually left with headaches from crying babies and crazy toddlers. (I know, horrible excuses). Where do I find time to eat?? Well during my permanent weekday schedule, I get a 20 minute break...doesn't give me much time for a healthy meal...nights, can't cook for my boyfriend and myself because he won't eat my healthy choices...So, I don't cook hardly at all...Even though I'm good at it.
I guess it really comes down to commitment? And motivation to stick to a plan....But, I do feel stressed do to work. But i have to make money. Did I mention I suffer from depression? Have always since a child, but that...is a story of its own of course, but I do feel like that might be affecting my weight loss goals as well.
This post, is basically my "Diary" to help myself...To look back at when needed. Thanks?
