new girl needs help!

K

kdlee12001

New member
Ok- I am totally new to this and need help! I know what works... After my third child, I looked GREAT! I got down to 123 with diet and exercise (and a divorce). I have since then found the love of my life, had child #4, and gained weight. I am at 150 lbs. This is the heaviest I've ever been while not pregnant, and I am sick about it. Thing is, I work a full time job and have 4 kids, so I am a busy person. I am having a problem staying motivated. My soon-to-be husband is in great shape, so while I am trying to loose, he is maintaining. I don't know what to cook so that everyone in the family eats. I don't have the energy to work-out after the kids go to bed, so I get up at 4:30 a.m. Motivation is tough that early.

I need a "friend" besides my boyfriend to hold me accountable. Anyone who is willing to check in a couple times a week will be greatly appreciated! I weigh in on Monday mornings, but need someone to keep me on track throughout the week.
 
I'll offer encouragement!

Hi, I too am in a similar situation. My motivation really is not there. The desire yes, the drive, not so much.

I like you got down to my goal weight quite a few times before and now I seem to be struggling with motivation. I will scratch your back if you scratch mine.

As you know, life is much more exciting when you are lean and healthy. Lets make a pact to get there! I will write you everyday. Promise!:)
 
AWESOME! You are now on my buddy list. I will try to log on around lunch time in Texas (Central time) and in the evenings after the kiddos go down. Promise to lecture me about the importance of a good nights sleep and tell me to get off the stinkin' computer if it gets too late.

Here's to new-found motivation- *CHEERS*
 
I suggest starting a journal. You'll find lot's of support that way.

If it makes you feel any better, I am getting up and training at 5 a.m. most days of the week and I have a second training session at night.

Truth be told, there are 168 hours in a week and exercise only takes up at most 10 hours... and that's on the high side. That leaves you with about 94% of your time to do the other required things.
 
You bet I will!

I am in California so, you are two hours ahead of me. If you had your breakfast this morning, I am sure it was a plentiful meal to get your energy up. You certainly do need proper rest. One of the reasons why many of us don't have the energy to exercise is because we are not getting enough rest to begin with. Get at least 7-9 hours of sleep. If you can't make it to the gym, at least walk around the block a bit. Don't think that just a bit of exercise is insignificant, it is not. Think about this, if you rarely or never do any exercise at all, even a small bit on a consistant basis will make some difference. I am going to the grocery store today and I am sure like most American families, we are living pay check to pay check and "healthy" foods like fresh fruits and vegatables, meats, and whole grains are real expensive. But, I am going to get the best I can with what money I've got.

I hope to see your post sometime this evening. I hope you spent some time on yourself. I will read your "report" later.
:hug2:
 
Steve!

I am considering a journal. I know this sounds lame, but I can't figure out how to start one or a new topic for that matter. What am I missing. I would like to write down all my feelings and frustrations for the day. I need to release all the negative stuff. If you can tell me how, I would appreciate it.
 
Thank you Juliette!

I appreciate your help. I will start it this afternoon after I drop my son off to his grandmother's. I appreciate your help! How are you on this weight loss journey?
 
hey KdLee,

This whole forum is about support!
So you will find plenty of it!

Do start a diary. You can tell us what you wish, and we will respond.

Best wishes hun
Good luck on happy trails :)
always
natalie jo
 
Thanks to all! Check out my diary- Kady's Diary. You rock Ms. Gordon! I'll be checking both spots when I log on! And eventually i will figure out the ticker signature and how to download my before pics! Look for updates soon.
 
Nataliejo!

Hi There!

I plan on getting started as soon as my son leaves for his grandmother's house. I must warn you all, that sometimes I will write some pretty depressing dark things. My moods have been real strange lately. I am trying to find a job back in my home town and I feel discouraged because thinks are not moving fast enough. I dont' know why, but everytime I go on a job interview, I get real excited, start feeling positive, feel encouraged to eat rigth and then by the third day after I do not hear from my prospective employer, I start binge eating. I feel like life is not worth living, I get bitchy with people at work, I come home and fall asleep at 6pm in the evening and keep thinking how pointless life is. Looking to start my life all over again.

That is just a taste of how depressed I am. So, I am warning you all. Now, I am not writing this to get sympathy, because I can't stand for people to feel sorry for me, but I do feel like all these wierd @%#!! up emotions are causing me to grub and feel hopeless. It would be nice to just get it all out and hear from people to share this awful pain so we can figure out a way to avoid falling into darkness and dipping into the candy bowl.

I have read your other post Nateliejo, and I can see that you have been here for a while, I would love to hear your rants if any. Thanks for the encouragement.
 
wow- glad I'm not the only one! My kids are 8, 5, 3, and 8 months. I've had some CRAZY mood swings lately. I wonder if stopping birth control pills has something to do with it. I have considered going to the doctor to get those little happy pills that everyone seems to take. If anyone has thoughts on that, let me know.

What we can do, Ms. Gordon, is tyr to do our ranting here. I feel beyond terrible when I end up blowing up at my kids.
 
Blowing up at the kids!

I know what you mean! I too take things out on my son and he has nothing to do with my misery. I feel guilty and then ashamed and I find it hard to face him. I am so bitter about life. I do understand how you feel. I would suggest talking to your kids honestly as to why you are so stressed out. I have had that discussion with my son. I told him the truth. That I am not doing very well in my life right now and I am very grouchy. I am sure if you just be straight forward with them, they will understand. No point in sugar coating it, kids are smarter than you think. Besides, at least they will know that it is not their fault. I am sure you are a good parent.
 
Blowing up at the kids-part 2

By the way, I have been on anti depressants before and I didn't like that too much. I was prescribed Wellbutrin150XL. I felt indifferent to everything. I walked around having no emotions. I am not in the medical field, but I think doctors prescribe anti depressants too much. I did not really believe for one minute that I had a chemical imbalance in my brain. My life started sucking and I wanted to pop a pill to make me forget it.

For me a pill was not the solution. I am now identifying the problem and I am working on it.

In your case, perhaps it is chemical. You are going from taking a prescribed medicine (birth control) and now you are not taking them anymore. Or maybe you are going through a phase in your life where you are feeling stressed out and are not happy. Only you know that. You must ask yourself why you are like this and be honest with yourself.

I wanted to believe that I had a chemical imbalance so bad. It seemed easier for me to deal with. But, I am now ready to fix what is wrong and make to be happy. I wish you and everybody else happiness as well.
 
Happy Pills

Wow! I know what you mean after I had my daughter I started taking birth control and I noticed wierd things starting to happening to me. My hair started falling out, I was tired all the time, and blew up my weight shot thru the roof! I stopped taking the birth control and I got feelings of depression, lost my labido totally, and became very irritated with my family. This went on for about a year and a half I finally said something to my family doctor at my daughter's appointment and she asked me several questions on my mood, how long my feelings of depression and anxiety had been going on, and lastly when these feelings really flared up. To make a long story-short it turns out that I DO have GAD and SAD: General Anxiety Disorder and Seasonal Anxiety Disorder. I am currently taking 75mg EffexorXR once daily and to tell you the truth I'm so much happier I feel like I'm ME again. I want to play with my daughter, I want to spend time with my husband, and do have the energy to do the normal wifely duties; cooking, cleaning, etc.

Take the time to write down your feelings down in a notebook and talk to your family doctor about them. Because no one truly understands how you're feeling except for you. There are lots of available medicines out there that wont make you feel emotionless, zombie-like, or tired. You and your doctor will find the right one for you, also if the doctor tries one medicine and you still don't feel right then ask for a different one I went thru 3 different ones; Zoloft, Lexapro, and then EffexorXR. But either way I wish you the best of luck and I will be glad to chat with you if you ever feel the need to vent to someone.
 
hi guys. i too, am new. i just figured out how to set up an avatar. now how do i get one of those BMI graphics as a "signature"? lol
and yes, let's all motivate each other. i sure need it!
 
Welcome, clownfish... as you can see, I can't figure out the signature thing either. I saw instructions somewhere, thought I followed them, but obviously didn't. If you check back in and figure it out, let me know!!!
 
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