Lay it on me....

[vickca86]

Ok, here's the deal. Been married 8 years. Sex life has been non existent for 5 of those years. I think its because I'm fat. I weigh 285 and have always weighed between 285 and 315 since I can remember, even before I married. My wife has always been thin but between children and poor eating habits developed since being with me she was pushing 180 but has recently dropped to 106 and is all about the fitness game now. I feel like its time I get on board not just for her but for me, my health and self esteem.

My problem has always been where do I start? There is so much BS out there about weight loss and fitness, always a new fad. I want to know exactly what I should be doing to workout so that I don't end up looking like a deflated bag of skin when I loose my weight. Realistically I know that there is going to be loose skin, I have stretch marks really bad on my stomach, that have scarred over but I want to do this and loose my weight the right way and just become a fit person. I know that I can have surgery to remove the excess skin but that will take time to save for so i would like to minimize the loose skin as much as possible.

As far as diet I love veggies and fresh food so I dont have a problem eating those things I just have a problem with time and meal prep. I'm a husband, father, student and full time employee so I do not have much free time at all. The main thing for me is knowing exactly what to do and knowing that if I do that I will achieve fitness.....

 

[CrazyOldMan]

Ok try this system, 10% diet. Increase activity by 10% and decrease intake by the same 10%. Nothing specific, or dramatic unless you are eating a pound of lard a day, in which case stop it. Do this until you are used to it then repeat, following what your body tells you iis needed regarding diet changes etc.
It does work if you have the patience, but is slow enough to be safe and maintainable. The reasons are below.
You will be overloading your body, without excess by only increasing activity a small amount. If you get of the sofa and run a marathon you will die of heart attack, as hundreds do every year. f your normal level of activity is such that adding 10% means walking up and down the stairs a few times, it will be a good start and you will likely find it tiring for the first few days, if you normally walk around a park once at lunch and add a bit to the route it will be enough at first.
Drastic changes to diet will leave you hungry, reducing a little will effect you far less.
As your activity level increases your body will ask for foods it needs to sustain this, more starchy and protein rich food will become appealing along with trace rich foods like fruits and veggies you are already used to.

This is not a quick fix, I don't do those because with few exceptions they are a path to yoyo diet.

Obviously if your initial activity increase is up and down stairs there will come a point when this gets dull and you will want to do something else like go for a walk or a gym class, when this happens, go for it.
As you approach your ideal weight the gradual decrease in food needs to reverse until you level out and then you will be there. This will take a good while but if you are willing to stick to it you will safely lose weight and get fit. Think in terms of next year and year after rather than summer.