Kara's Diary...The Southern Girl Loses Weight!

K

karaw

New member
So I am from Mississippi...the good ole south. Everything in the south is surrounded by, inspired by, celebrated by FOOD. Food is my obsession. Mississippi is the most obese state for a reason...we fry everything! The portions are huge and all of our vegetables are cooked with high amounts of fat. So I'm not only losing weight, I'm leaving behind a southern lifestyle that I've loved (and hated) for so long. Everyone in my family is huge...except for my parents, they've both lost a bunch of weight...and I want to lose weight so that I don't have the health problems that my parents and the people in my family have had. I'm just 25 years old and I have the change to live the rest of my life as a healthy adult. I just got married in December and now I want children, but how can I ever have a child and raise it to be healthy, when I'm almost 300 pounds! Now is time to do something for myself and my future children. I want a different life. I don't want high blood pressure, heart disease, clogged arteries. I want to be healthy! I want to shed every pound of this HUGE SHELL that I've been hiding under my whole life. I was sexually abused as a child, and eating and gaining weight was my way of making sure no male would ever touch me. It's time for me to heal and get over it. I'm ready!

So far, I've gone from 296.5 to 273...that's a weight loss of 23.5 pounds in 7 weeks (that averages out to be about 3 pounds per week).


Now if i could only get my ass off the couch and exercise!
 
Hi karaw! I'm so excited you started a weight loss journal, it is going to be amazingly helpful, I'm sure you'll discover this soon. This is the start of something wonderful for you and I know that you'll do well, but I also know how difficult it is to try and eat healthily in the South. I moved here 3 years ago and I've subsequently gained about 50 pounds, I blame at least a little of that on the delicious food. I'd never heard of hushpuppies or sweet tea, and I'd never seen so much fried goodness in my life. Southern comfort food is eviillllll. But you can do this, so can I, we'll all lose weight together.

Do you count your calories and exercise? What have you been doing that is working so well? By the way, congratulations on already losing 23 and a half pounds! Welcome again!
 
Welcome to the forums! Congraulations on getting married and loosing your first 23.5 lbs. Your off to a great start, and a better lifestyle. If you start making changes now, not only will it benefit you, but when you have kids, you'll have much more to teach them!

Goodluck on your journey!
 
Food!!

:) Hi!! Welcome!!!

We all have different reasons to have unhealthy relationships with food. When we realize the motives then you can change it. I'm proud of your decision to go to a next level in your life and make some changes for good. I'm glad you start a diary. I'm new and trying to loose almost 64 pounds. I have a diary also.

You can workout!! The worst day is the first one, the first week. Try it!!

chimistar
 
Thanks so much for the support, guys! To answer your question, Lukewarm, I'm counting calories like crazy...i don't think I could live without ! I can have up to 1600 calories per day, but I usually stay between 1350 and 1500. I also meet with my dietician once every month to track my progress and to talk about any "roadblocks" that might be headed my way. As far as exercise goes, I go walking, sometimes play frisbee or football with my husband, and I go swimming a lot, but I do not like the gym (even though I'm a member of my local YMCA gym). I've been really itching to start a formal exercise routine to work into my schedule. I get bored easily, so the treadmill/elliptical things are hard for me.
 
Congrats on the 23 pounds already! Very awesome :).

If the same routine (elliptical and such) is boring, does the YMCA have any classes you could join? I was a member at a gym before and they offered free classes with memberships so you didn't have to pay for individual classes and could switch classes at will.

I love to swim, too. I do that once a week just because leaving my house to work out is hard for me. I'll admit I'm lazy about my workouts... If I made them hard to get to, I just wouldn't do them. When the weights are sitting right in front of me, I have no excuse to not pick them up.

I think you are doing great!
 
So I was up at 6am yesterday...dressing in my work out clothes and heading around the corner from my house to the local YMCA gym. I did 10 minutes of pretty fast walking. I think that's a good start. I also went swimming yesterday afternoon for about 30 or 45 minutes. I defanitely need to get more cardio and weight training into my routine. I should have gone to work out this morning, but I'm so completely exhausted for some reason. I get off at 4:30 today, so I hope to get a good work out right after work. My progress with my diet lately has been pretty good, I guess. I'm not being as strict and I am letting myself have some things...in moderation of course. My dietician told me I was being way too restrictive...and that I was heading down the road to turning back to how I was eating before. Of course I'm not going over my 1600 calorie limit, but I am eating an average of 1500-1550 calories instead of my usual 1200 or 1300. I'm also drinking more water. I have such a tendency to focus on the things I'm doing wrong, that this time I'm trying to STAY MOTIVATED and focus on the good things! My dietician said that before I started my diet, I was eating an average of 2750 calories a day to maintain my weight of 296.5. I WAS ASTONISHED! That's a lot of freaking calories, so I've already cut that in half, baby! AND the other day I went shopping...TO OLD NAVY! Now some of you might not find this a big deal, but old navy doesn't carry sizes over an 18. I didn't get any pants, but I did actually fit into some of their shirts. I haven't fit into their shirts in a long time. I also am going to have to buy a belt. All of my jeans (all size 24) are getting so baggy...man that feels nice! I guess I'm just going to take things one day at a time. I'm going to have to force myself to do things I don't want to do. It took me a LONG time to get myself here, and It's going to take a long time to get myself back.

I work at an inpatient psychiatric hospital (i'm a therapist ) and it's a huge campus. My goal for today is to park my car, and walk to the different buildings I need to go to. I could probably walk miles and miles and MILES every day, just going to see my different groups and patients!
 
Welcome to journaling :)

Congrats for the marriage and the awesome decision to make this change. It really does sound like you are ready.

I can't help but read every word you type with a southern accent! :p

Calories seem a bit low. Not THAT big of a deal.... but will become one down the road.
 
Steve said:
Welcome to journaling :)

I can't help but read every word you type with a southern accent! :p

Calories seem a bit low. Not THAT big of a deal.... but will become one down the road.
Click to expand...

People make fun of my accent all the time...I just can't help it..I'm a Mississippi girl!

so you really think my calories will be a problem down the road? how so?

i know nothing about dieting so any suggestions would be great
 
Hey Ya'll! (Man I feel like Paula Deen when I say that!)

Today was a good day. We had a big even for all of the individuals at the psychiatric hospital that I work at. I was dancing and moving all afternoon and I'm feelin pretty engergized. Losing weight is really hard. I'm such a hard-headed, stubborn, impatient, Irish southern lady that I want what I want NOW! I want to be healthy and in shape now and I'm feeling myself getting tired and weary and I'm afraid I'm gonna start drifting off my path. I just feel like the first 23.5 pounds came off so easily. I feel like it should have been harder! I should be working out all the time, and I'm not! I just don't like be rewarded for something I don't feel I've worked hard for and that I don't deserve. I don't know what it is with me...I'm in such a weird mood this week.

I just used the words "tired and weary"....reminds me of an Elvis song (he's from Mississippi, you know!) :

"Oh well, I'm tired and so weary
But I must go alone
Till the lord comes and calls, calls me away, oh yes
Well the morning's so bright
And the lamp is alight
And the night, night is as black as the sea, oh yes

There will be peace in the valley for me, some day
There will be peace in the valley for me, oh Lord I pray
There'll be no sadness, no sorrow
No trouble, trouble I see
There will be peace in the valley for me, for me"

LOL! I've been singing this song ALL day! I used it in one of my therapy groups this morning...and it's been stuck ever since!
 
23.5 pounds is a lot already and you've come so far. I know after keeping going for weeks after weeks on a diet or with exercise it's hard to keep going. I completely feel you there! Tired and weary... understatement some days!

Sounds like therapy was good not just for the patients today, you got to have some fun, too!
 
Times like this are hard for me. It's a holiday weekend and I have my wonderful inlaws visiting....and it's also the HARDEST TIME for me to stick to my diet. WHY IS THIS? I feel myself slipping back into my old ways...or at least in my mind that's the way I see it. I'm so busy that I don't have a lot of time to update my food diary, but when I do, I see that I'm eating more than I should....eating snacks when I'm not hungry...and eating things that are NOT the healthiest choice. And I always do this when I have family visiting or vice versa. I just wish I knew why I did this. I also wish I knew why I'm so hard on myself. I'm seriously making it very hard for me to see any improvements...I'm a walking self-criticizer. It's really making this journey of getting healthy a horrible time instead of a joyful time. I should be proud of myself, but all I want to do is to be perfect...and I'm not. And I feel like a failure when I'm not the perfect dieter or exerciser. What's wrong with me?
 
Kara, those feelings are normal. I think we all feel terrible when we can't stick to a diet we picked or in our calorie limits. It's darn hard!

This weekend maybe your choices could have been better or portions could have been better, but what's done is done. Just jump back in where you can. Perfection is not always the best way. And perfect is certainly not the most fun way ;).
 
The memorial day weekend is over and I made it through without any diet disasters...well, maybe one. On saturday I went over my calories by 343! But I also was swimming and walking ALL DAY, so I think I'm fine. Last night, I sat down and watched my wedding DVD with my in-laws and I was amazed that I actually did notice that I've lost weight! I even went and put on my wedding dress to see if it fit differently...and it did! It's much looser! I remember my dress being so tight that I had to wear suck-me-in stuff underneath it just to fit in it. I tried it on without that stuff and it fits great. I love that dress, and I don't see why I can't wear it around my house if I want...I did pay $900 for it!

anyways, I was just happy to see that I really have changed in appearance and with my relationship with food. I just sit and think about how I ate before, and how obsessed I was with food and how I loved food more than myself, and then I think about how I am now with food, and I smile. I have changed. I know it's going to take a long time and watching that dvd and remembering the old me made me realize how good I am doing. It was a nice little booster :)

So here's to realizing I have the power now...and not the food. And to realizing that I no longer eat two breakfasts and two dinners...and I no longer drink soda all day...and I no longer feel exhausted at 3pm. I'm proud of myself!
 
I think it's great that you are sticking to this so well and making life changes with food.

I've been tempted to try on my wedding dress, too! I'm glad yours is fitting so great! I think we work so hard for that one day, then sometimes we don't always get to judge the progress we make afterward. It's all leading up to getting in the dress, that sometimes a bit of focus is lost. Trying mine on again might give me some focus again :).
 
Oh My Gosh...do I actually LIKE to work out??!!

So today I got FED UP and I said THAT'S IT, KARA! YOU ARE GOING TO START WORKING OUT WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT...COME HELL OR HIGH WATER YOU ARE GOING TO MOVE YOUR ASS! So that's exactly what I did today. At 5, I went to the gym and walked SUPER FAST PACE (i was pretty much jogging) for 20 minutes. Then I went to a pilates class for 40 minutes. I have a whole plan now for next week. My local YMCA gives different classes every week day...tomorrow its cardio, then gentle yoga, then some weights. i'm super psyched now!
 
I'm doing great!

Despite a few minor setbacks, I am doing great! And by setbacks I mean struggling with my childhood as a survivor of sexual abuse and dealing with just WHY I turned to food for emotional comfort. At a time when I lost everything...my innocence and my childhood...I truly had nothing. Nothing but food. I feel like my doing this I'm losing my best friend. Is that weird? I'm sure ya'll think that I'm a total nutcase...and I'm actually a therapist! I work at a mental hospital. I'm dealing with my past in a positive light now and I'm doing good. I've lost 29.5 pounds so far and I'm so proud of myself. I'm starting to really enjoy working out! Now my goal is to hit the 50 pound weight loss mark and to make my exercise schedule more CONSISTENT. consistency is key!! (or so I'm told!)
 
Kara, I think it's great that you are working on your relationship with food and the ties that come along with it. I don't have the same connection with food you do, but understand what you're saying. I think a lot of issues adults have come from childhood events. Even small events can trigger huge lifelong consequences. I used to get mad at my husband when he would forget to call or promise something then forget (unintentionally). It came from my past with my mom. When I realized that I was able to work through it and let it go. It was a long process and that's not nearly as complicated an issue as what you endured in your childhood. That you've made a connection between the two and are ready to take a look at it, I feel, is a step in the right direction.

Keep going, you're doing great!
 
so I've been doing pretty good lately, I guess. I'm still not consistent AT ALL with exercise. I'm actually not exercising hardly at all. The last time I weighed the scale said 267, which means I've lost 29.5 pounds so far. I'm not writing that number in stone yet, because I go by the scale at my dietician's office, so I go for another visit on Tuesday and I'll update my weight then. I've been really stressed, and no matter how much I want to cheat, there is something stopping me. I think about those cheeseburgers and fries at burker king and mcdonald's, and it seriously makes me sick to think about eating those things. I've missed a few days of writing in my food diary lately, but I'll get back on track...I always do (so far anyway). I'm looking forward to talking with my dietician on Tuesday and getting some of her advice. She always motivates me! I make a list of goals in the morning when I get to work, and I try my best to do those daily goals. People at work are really starting to notice, and even the residents ( i work at an inpatient psych. facility) and it feels really nice! I even fit into a size 20 last night!...and just think, I started at a TIGHT 24. yay! At this point, I'm trying to focus on the positive and take things one day at a time. I perfect by no means, and I have messed up, but I've also come so far!!!! So I'll focus on that and move on.
 
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