I'm 23 years old, female, and it appears that my life is crumbling around me. My weight, severe anxiety along with a list of issues hold me back from life. I truly feel like I have no purpose and no one to turn to that understands. My family looks at me like I'm lazy, or a failure.. I'm not. I'm just.. broken. I've lost all of my pieces and I've accepted this. The friends I had in high school are creating a life for themselves and here I am, questioning mine. I've tried so many things to be healthy, so many things to stay strong but to be completely honest I just need a friend. Someone who understands me.. someone who won't judge me. It's too bad that only happens to people that "deserve" it. I'm forever alone in my mind and heart. Forever a prisoner just waiting for time to pass by so I can be put out of my misery.
It's 2am, and here I am..
- Thread starter Sad Panda
- Start date
Nostalgic
New member
Only you can turn things around. Don't focus on the lives of others, focus on yours and what makes you happy.
Searching for a great friend or partner only leads to disappointment. These people generally come along out of the blue when you are feeling happy within yourself.
It can be tough. My first year in France I only had one friend, my husband which was nice but everyone needs their own lives outside of the couple. That was tough on both of us. I didn't make any friends until I found a job. I never scouted the woman to find the perfect friend although I Joined in socially where and when I could. The perfect friend eventually found me.
Searching for a great friend or partner only leads to disappointment. These people generally come along out of the blue when you are feeling happy within yourself.
It can be tough. My first year in France I only had one friend, my husband which was nice but everyone needs their own lives outside of the couple. That was tough on both of us. I didn't make any friends until I found a job. I never scouted the woman to find the perfect friend although I Joined in socially where and when I could. The perfect friend eventually found me.
Omega
Moderator
Welcome to the forum.
I am sorry to hear that things currently appear so bleak. Hopefully things will look brighter soon.
Whilst we all get anxious at times - anxiety can be a symptom of medical conditions and it is worth you discussing your anxiety with your doctor... There may be something that he can do to help. Such help is not always in the form of prescribed medication... I have known people who were having panic attacks (which is quite a frightening form of anxiety) have wonderful results from cognitive behavioural therapy - which actually just consists of sitting talking to a person who is skilled and qualified in this way...
As to your weight - you have come to the perfect place!!! There is lots of information here on how to healthily lose weight. How much weight would you like to lose? If you have a lot of weight to lose - it takes time but can be done... I lost half my start weight in about 13 months here a few years back. No task is too big if we just focus on the task in hand and simply keep on trying to eat healthily and exercise...
Focus on this - there is nothing broken that cannot be fixed...
Far from anyone thinking that you are a failure - when you get on a roll with your project - people will be impressed with how well you are doing... When I did my big project I used to go out walking every day... After I had lost a fair bit of weight - strangers used to stop me in the street and congratulate me on my weight loss and ask me my secret...
Actually - at age 23 - you are addressing your issues at a really sensible time... I waited until I was 47 before I did my big project and lost all that weight... My life could have been very different if I had been the same size as everyone else in my late 20s, my 30s or even my early and mid 40s... Now I go dancing and doing zumba every day - things that I looked on in envy when I was young are available to me now... At 23 - you are more sensible than I was... I convinced myself that it was too difficult and kept on giving up!!!
Its a shame that your old friends have moved on to new things... this is however perfectly normal... I had to create a new circle of friends at about your age too... I actually had to do the same again last year (we had to move 300 miles back to my home town where I last lived about 30 years ago as my parents are in their 90s now and I was worried about them as I am their only child)... I found that joining zumba and salsa classes really helped my social life and are great exercise too for helping me try to look after my weight... Maybe joining new classes like that would help you too... We all need some "real life" friends...
I suggest that you read the following thread - it may help you settle in and make friends here
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/threads/57955-My-advice-to-newcomers
Good luck with your project.
I am sorry to hear that things currently appear so bleak. Hopefully things will look brighter soon.
Whilst we all get anxious at times - anxiety can be a symptom of medical conditions and it is worth you discussing your anxiety with your doctor... There may be something that he can do to help. Such help is not always in the form of prescribed medication... I have known people who were having panic attacks (which is quite a frightening form of anxiety) have wonderful results from cognitive behavioural therapy - which actually just consists of sitting talking to a person who is skilled and qualified in this way...
As to your weight - you have come to the perfect place!!! There is lots of information here on how to healthily lose weight. How much weight would you like to lose? If you have a lot of weight to lose - it takes time but can be done... I lost half my start weight in about 13 months here a few years back. No task is too big if we just focus on the task in hand and simply keep on trying to eat healthily and exercise...
Focus on this - there is nothing broken that cannot be fixed...
Far from anyone thinking that you are a failure - when you get on a roll with your project - people will be impressed with how well you are doing... When I did my big project I used to go out walking every day... After I had lost a fair bit of weight - strangers used to stop me in the street and congratulate me on my weight loss and ask me my secret...
Actually - at age 23 - you are addressing your issues at a really sensible time... I waited until I was 47 before I did my big project and lost all that weight... My life could have been very different if I had been the same size as everyone else in my late 20s, my 30s or even my early and mid 40s... Now I go dancing and doing zumba every day - things that I looked on in envy when I was young are available to me now... At 23 - you are more sensible than I was... I convinced myself that it was too difficult and kept on giving up!!!
Its a shame that your old friends have moved on to new things... this is however perfectly normal... I had to create a new circle of friends at about your age too... I actually had to do the same again last year (we had to move 300 miles back to my home town where I last lived about 30 years ago as my parents are in their 90s now and I was worried about them as I am their only child)... I found that joining zumba and salsa classes really helped my social life and are great exercise too for helping me try to look after my weight... Maybe joining new classes like that would help you too... We all need some "real life" friends...
I suggest that you read the following thread - it may help you settle in and make friends here
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/threads/57955-My-advice-to-newcomers
Good luck with your project.
joshd_1973
New member
I think change is difficult if you go it alone. I've been fortunate that I've been helped by my wife also deciding to lose weight and I've been joined by 7 members of my family and we all converse together on Whatsapp daily about goals, targets, achievements.
Sounds like you need a weight loss buddy!
Sounds like you need a weight loss buddy!