I'm worried about my grandfather....

Okay I wanted to talk about how I am worried about my 68 year old grandfather that I live with and what I should try and do. My grandpa is 68 years old and has type 2 diabetes, and glaucoma and he is slightly overweight (he weighs 210 pounds and is 5'11). The thing I am worried about is that he has the type 2 diabetes and he eats so much sugary junk food like twinkies,hostess pies,cookies,tons of cake,ice cream,chocolate candy bars, and tons of other junk food. He eats stuff like this everyday and he also drinks 2-3 beers or more a day and it worries me because he will probably end up dieing by 72 or sooner..... He has tried taking medicine for it but he stopped taking the medicine and told his doctor that he couldn't take the medicine because he wanted to drink so badly and he couldn't even go one week without drinking atleast one beer... then on top of that he causes alot of stress in my life due to the fact that he has severe anger issues and then on top of that he has high blood pressure due to all of the sugary crap that he eats and the large amount of alcohol he drinks. I try to talk to him about it and tell him to stop eating that stuff or else you're going to kill yourself and I then tell him that it also causes alot of stress on me... And then he usually just goes off on me when ever I bring it up... I can't move out because I am only 14, but I need to get away from him not because I hate my grandfather but because of all the stress that he causes me. If he keeps up with drinking and eating like this he will most likely die very soon especially since he has been doing it for the past 2 years.... I wish I knew what he is trying to do by killing himself like this. :/
 
grandfather

Spencer, you sound like a very smart guy. You realize that your grandfather is in serious trouble. At your age it is not your job to take care of him any more than you have already tried. I doubt that you can get him to change. Your job is to take care of yourself by finding some adult whom you trust, a teacher or counselor at school, a clergyman, a doctor, a social worker. One of these people will help you figure out what options you have. I wish you all the best.
 
It is hard when someone you care about or even just rely on does things to harm themselves, all you end up doing is sitting by and helplessly watching them destroy themselves or their lives bit by bit.

Unfortunetly there isn't anything we can do to make people change what they do, its up to them to change how they act and how they live, it is their responsibility, its not yours, please don't feel at all as if its anything you could prevent or stop him from doing, he is alot older and each of us are in charge of our own bodies and lifestyles. If he is having problems, this doesn't default him from responsibility, it means he needs to take a step back, realise he is not coping and ask for some help.

Move out- get somewhere safe by all means but you are quite young and aside from wondering about the legality of moving out, is there any sort of social services you can get in touch with that can either rehouse you or get your grandfather to clean up his ways?
 
It is hard when someone you care about or even just rely on does things to harm themselves, all you end up doing is sitting by and helplessly watching them destroy themselves or their lives bit by bit.

Unfortunetly there isn't anything we can do to make people change what they do, its up to them to change how they act and how they live, it is their responsibility, its not yours, please don't feel at all as if its anything you could prevent or stop him from doing, he is alot older and each of us are in charge of our own bodies and lifestyles. If he is having problems, this doesn't default him from responsibility, it means he needs to take a step back, realise he is not coping and ask for some help.

Move out- get somewhere safe by all means but you are quite young and aside from wondering about the legality of moving out, is there any sort of social services you can get in touch with that can either rehouse you or get your grandfather to clean up his ways?

Well moving is not really an option because I don't really have anywhere else to go because my mom abused me when I was younger and thats how my dad got custody of me and me and my dad are both living with my grandfather because my dad is making minimum wage driving from memphis to nashville and back delivering car parts every night and it really sucks because he only makes $55 a night for driving from 5:30 pm-2 am. I hardly see my dad since he works at night and I have to go to school. My dad is the one that has current custody of me and we are living with my grandfather because we can not afford to move somewhere else (the cheapest house we found was $400 a month. The reason its so expensive is because of us living in midtown) I have tried to talk to my dad about moving further south down to Enid,Mississippi where we have 10 acres of land and buying a small 2 or 3 bedroom trailer to live in but he says he does not want to move away from his father. The only family I have that hasn't left me is my dad, my grandfather, and my little 7 year old brother that still currently lives with my mother and we need to get him out of there because she is abusing him and I know this because I lived with my mom and I saw what my mom did. Right now my dad just keeps telling me to try my best to deal with my grandfather but it's very hard because I have already been through enough stress in my life. I do not want to call child services because I refuse to go into state custody because I do not want to loose communication with what little family that still talks to me. All of this stuff has caused me to start loosing weight because when I get stressed I just stop doing anything and I don't eat much. I would like to do something about all of this stuff in my life but I am only 14 so it looks like I have to just wait 4 more years until I can actually do something about it.
 
Well moving is not really an option because I don't really have anywhere else to go because my mom abused me when I was younger and thats how my dad got custody of me and me and my dad are both living with my grandfather because my dad is making minimum wage driving from memphis to nashville and back delivering car parts every night and it really sucks because he only makes $55 a night for driving from 5:30 pm-2 am. I hardly see my dad since he works at night and I have to go to school. My dad is the one that has current custody of me and we are living with my grandfather because we can not afford to move somewhere else (the cheapest house we found was $400 a month. The reason its so expensive is because of us living in midtown) I have tried to talk to my dad about moving further south down to Enid,Mississippi where we have 10 acres of land and buying a small 2 or 3 bedroom trailer to live in but he says he does not want to move away from his father. The only family I have that hasn't left me is my dad, my grandfather, and my little 7 year old brother that still currently lives with my mother and we need to get him out of there because she is abusing him and I know this because I lived with my mom and I saw what my mom did. Right now my dad just keeps telling me to try my best to deal with my grandfather but it's very hard because I have already been through enough stress in my life. I do not want to call child services because I refuse to go into state custody because I do not want to loose communication with what little family that still talks to me. All of this stuff has caused me to start loosing weight because when I get stressed I just stop doing anything and I don't eat much. I would like to do something about all of this stuff in my life but I am only 14 so it looks like I have to just wait 4 more years until I can actually do something about it.

I don't get why moving out is not an option.

Aren't you in the US? You should have a social service structure which will protect children (or aim to protect children) from abuse and neglect. Go to the police station, speak to an officer, say you need to get out, explain how your brother is also at risk/being abused. Both are crimes and need to be addressed, you can get help, you can be fostered or live elsehwere, the state will deal with that. It happens every day, most of the time people get caught, shopped to the police or social services by a well meaning teacher/friend/relative but you can do this yourself as a child.

You shouldn't be going through that and there are legal and legit ways out. You just need to ask for help.
 
Have you told him how you feel? Does he realise the seriousness of his situation? Does he not care because of depression?

I think the best you can do is let him know how you feel and how it is affecing you, and encourage him to talk to his doctor to work out the best plan.
 
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