I'm afraid

H

Hope1977

New member
Hello Everyone,

I hope I can find a friend...to make a long story short, I've been married for 3 very stressful years and we are separating. In those 3 years i've gained over 50 pounds and now i'm afraid for my health. My husband is leaving me. I'm just really depressed and don't feel like i can do this. I want to lose weight because I am genuinely now afraid for my health. I'm only 4 foot 10 and i'm nearing 200 pounds. I'm also sad that my husband has separated with me and is ashamed of me. He never said he was but I can tell.

Can someone please just offer some sort of guidance on how to start this thing?

Thank you

Hope
 
Hi Hope,
Welcome to the WLF,
I can only imagine how difficult this time is for you right now, but know that this will pass.

Do you have a plan for your menu or exercises?

Diet is truly the biggest contribution to weightloss. I'd highly suggest counting calories ( or are both sites for tracking calories, nutrition and fitness). Keep your calories around 10-12 calories per pound of body weight and start out moving some - go for a walk, stretch, jump some rope.

Take it one day at a time - you CAN do this!
 
Hi, Hope, and welcome to WLF.

What Deb said above is right -- diet is super critical.

But in some ways, knowledge is even more critical. To help you out, we have an Index of WLF "Keepers". There are some really fine posts there, with a ton of good ideas and sensible advice.

When I started my journey almost a year ago, I did it for the same reasons as you -- fear for my health. I was 70 lbs. overweight then, and now I'm half way to my goal of 200. Fear is a powerful motivator, but if you go about losing your weight the right way, it's also a good one.

Sorry about your divorce and all, but with the support and knowledge from WLF, you can win this battle.
 
Welcome to your journal. :)

So sorry to hear about the tough time you are having. I can imagine how stressful a divorce would be. And all of the negative emotions that get stirred up from within. It can be emotionally scarring, if you let it be!

I can also tell that you are stressing the extra weight you are carrying too. You can drop those worries right now! You CAN do this. Realize that it isn't a maybe. If you really want to lose the weight, and are willing to put in the effort and consistency needed, the weight will come off. No question about it. So it's not really a question of "Can I do this?" It's more a question of, "Will I do this?"

I think the biggest thing for you during this transition is to really work on your internal dialog. I like to call it "self-talk." Basically, it is the things you think about. Our thought patters control our lives. If you let your mind run wild, especially at a time like this, you are automatically going to focus on the negatives aspects of your life, which we ALL have BTW! Focusing on the negative will only lead to stagnation with regards to progress. Progress being the good things: Weight loss, personal happiness, love, confidence, etc.

Positive thinking is an overblown and oversold gimmicky market as of late, which is sad. Sad because our thought patters are at the root of all that we do, or don't do.

I am rambling, but I really do wish the best for you. There is light at the end of the tunnel. All you have to do is see it, believe it, and head for it!
 
Wow! Sounds like you're going through an amazingly tough time!! The best advice I can offer (after the above advice) is to set up an exercise routine that is POSSIBLE! If you can't go for an hour long run every day or to the gym 5 days a week, don't set that as your goal.
My start goal was a 20 minute walk 6 days a week. I KNOW I can fit 20 minutes in, and after 2 days my walks were already getting longer :D.

Set some small, attainable starter goals...the more often you reach a goal the more motivated you'll be! Oh! And check in here often, it's always great to hear what people are saying in your diary, there are some really friendly, helpful people in this forum!

:D

~nic~
 
I am sorry to hear about all you are going through. Just remember that even on the darkest cloud covered day, that the is a sun shining above.
 
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