I need your support!

sansony118

sansony118

New member
Hi, I've been reading all the wonderful success stories of weight loss in this forum and dream that one day I'll make it and lose all the weight. This is my first post and I just thought, maybe I'll get some support form some of you. YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING and the forum too.

I've been fat all my life. And now I'm OBESE as the BMI calculator indicates. I'm 5.6 tall, and weight currently 132kg (290 lbs). I KNOW HUGGGGE is the word to describe me. Every tiny and big problem in my life is caused because of my weight, I'm 26 now and I have never had a romantic relation, never been loved or treated as a lady becuz of my weight. Every single day is a battle for me, I wake up, try my best not to mess up my diet, and just before the day ends, right after 9 or 11 pm, I go to the kitchen and eat anything to mess up my diet BIG TIME!!! I can't understand why I'm doing this to myself and ruining my life. Maybe I'm afraid of failure, or success. I just don't know?!!!!!! I have been postponing my life until I lose weight, every time I want to do something fun, I just say, I'll do that once I lose weight, and so far, I have postponed LIVING my life for MOST OF MY LIFE. This time I HAVE TO LOSE the weight, I can't stall any longer and make excuses. My two best friends and me have decided to go in our FIRST vacation ever to Africa in December 2008. My friends offer me great deal of LOVE and support, they are the PERFECT thing in my life. So I'm suppose to lose weight by then. I know!! With my energy and effort, I can't lose all the weight and it is not healthy, but I was just hoping to get to 80kg, at least I would be chubby not OBESE!!!!

I plan to start my exercise and diet today, and I hope you can give me some support. I'll post some before pics soon.

Thanks for all the help and support you can give me guys!!!!!

Salam! ( this is bye in arabic,lol)
 
We're here for you! Start an online food diary at so that you can keep track of every morsel that goes into your mouth! Post a starting picture of yourself and use that as motivation to post a new pic each month showing your progress. You've got 5 months to make changes and get results before your vacation. You can do it!
 
hey sansony!!
you can do it! we believe in you. to loose fat you need to be in a calorie deficit and by my calculations (using the harris benedict equation to find maintenance calories then minusing off 20%) you could eat 2020 calories a day to loose 1 - 2 pounds per week. of course, the first couple of weeks you will loose the most because you would probably be cutting down a lot of the salt and thus not retaining as much water). so as nolarob said, open up an account at fitday.com and start tracking your food intake, not going over 2020 calories a day. if you have trouble finding certain foods on fitday.com then what i do is i usually search them on thedailyplate.com which has a bigger database. if you are consistent at tracking your food and staying within this calorie limit then results are inevitable. adding exercise to your routine would help speed up the process too, as you would be burning even more calories. every 10 pounds you loose, you will have to readjust to daily calorie intake accordingly. here is how to do this yourself...

just head on over to this site:
- once you calculated your BMR write it down
- click on "daily calorie needs" right below the 'calculate BMR button'
- do the calculation on the page depending on how active you are, and this will give you the calories that you need to MAINTAIN your weight
- then take your maintenance calories and minus off 20%, and this is what you should be eating to loose weight

you can find all this info right here on the site by reading all the stickied threads on top of the forums. i also find it helpful to read Steves posts which are very informative (all this info i am sharing with you, i received from reading his advice - and trust me its very effective i lost 20 pounds since late march)

BEST OF LUCK TO YOU SWEETIE AND STOP DELAYING YOUR LIFE ANY LONGER!
 
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hello sansony,
im sure everyone on this site will ofer you guidance and support as much as they can , at the end of the day we are all here to do the same thing be it 10lb or 100lb , and the december holiday is already a great motivater set for you :)

One thing i must say is try not to describe yourself so negatively because in losing the weight you need to be as positve as you can possibly be instead of describing yourself as huge
"It makes a lot more sense to say, 'This is who I am, this is what I can do, this is what I want to achieve.' That's when positive things start happening in your life." -www.revolutionhealth.com i get alot of the night time cravings which you described i just go straight to bed and it makes you enjoy breakfast all the more :D


anyway i wish you all the best , im sure youll do it just believe in yourself .
xox
 
THANKS guys for all your support and valuable information. I truly feel more motivated that you guys support me. I know that my best friends give me all the support they can, but you guys have been there and you know how HARD it is to lose weight and go through all the emotions associated with messing up a diet and restarting it over and over until you make it.
It is really amazing how a group of strangers will offer support and tell me without knowing me that I CAN MAKE IT and SUCCEED IN LOSING THE WEIGHT!! Really thanks a lotttttttttttttttttttt!!

Nola: THANKS for support and for being the first one to post a reply. You are active and VERY SUPPORTIVE to all members in this forum. Thanks you also for your information and the website you referred me to, I already signed in there and will do my best to FIGURE out how to use it properly and record my daily intake.

imagheti; THANK u sooooooooo much for all the support and great information you provided me with. I'll follow your advice inshallah and read in the threads and website you recommended. Bye the way, if I consume about 1800 calorie a day, would that make me lose more weight than 1-2 bounds per week?! I know the healthiest way to do it, is to lose weight gradually and slowly, but I need to step it up more to make noticeable change by December. So, if I can just lose about 6 lbs per week, that will be GREAT!

emmaro: Thanks for your support, you really have a point about my negativity in describing myself, I am pretty aware of this problem that I have and working towards fixing it. That's why I have been recently listening to audio books and reading articles that will help me turn my negative attitude regarding my weight into positive action. Hopefully I'll make it!

And yes, thanks for any one who reads my thread even without posting a reply.
 
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6 lbs a week may be pushing it. Slow and steady will win the race. I have been up, down,up,down, up. I always followed some plan either Low fat or low carb or some other plan. Most were severe calorie restrictive plans coupled with a lot of working out. I lost the weight but you know what, it was not a lifestyle that I could maintain so the weight came back on. Take it slow and you will be rewarded, not just for your trip but your life after the trip. If you lost 3 lbs a week, that is 63 lbs!!! by the 1st of December.
This time around with the information from sites like this. I am doing it right. The first thing I did was switch to a cleaner diet. I tend to stay away from items that are heavily processed, NO HFCS. I eat more fruits and vegetables and wonderful grains. When I eat, it doesn't feel like I am on a diet, because in my mind I am not. This is just the way I want to eat. I am never hungry, I have a ton of new found energy. I still allow myself the occasional cookie or dessert at an event because that is what we do in life. If you deprive yourself of everything, you are doomed to fail.
Good luck in your journey, We are all here help each other.
 
hey sweetie!

to answer your question, eating 1800 cals a day instead of 2020 would make a slight difference (perhaps you would loose .5 - 1 lb more a week) but i would recommend from my own experience to start at 2020. loosing the weight slower is in my opinion more achievable for numerous reasons, so i'll just list a few that i think of:

- because you probably eat a lot more than 2020 currently, striving to eat only 2020 would be more achievable and realistic in your situation - you dont want to starve yourself and then one night go on a binge because you have been too restrictive (trust me, those extra 200 cals make a big difference lol)
- because you have a significant amount of weight to drop, loosing it slowly gives your skin time to adjust to your smaller body mass and so you may reduce the appearance of saggy skin - i dont have personal experiance with this, but i have read this among some threads in the forum, and perhaps you may want to search it yourself
- you will eventually get to the point where you need to eat only 1800 to continue loosing weight (remember how i told you to recalculate the amount of calories you need to eat every 10 pounds you loose?)

INSTEAD of cutting it down even more calories to loose weight faster, i would recommend getting in some physical exercise to boost your progress. at first, it doesnt have to be anything too overwhelming... perhaps going for a half - 1 hr walk 3 nights a week, vacuuming and cleaning the whole house, dancing to your favorite CD etc. then as you loose more weight you may want to start walking at a faster pace, do some cardio exercises or even some work out videos in the privacy of your own home. just remember - every physical activity you do adds up to burned calories for that day so spend as little time on the couch/bed and find something fun to do. hope that helped and good luck with it all :)

oh and yes 6 pounds a week is not very realistic. slow and steady will get you to your desired goals. i think many of us have been on outrageous diets where 6 pounds/week was achievable but then most just gain the weight back as soon as the fad diet is over, and then also more pounds on top of that. what i am suggesting is a lifestyle change, and not a fad diet, which just leaves you even more unhealthier after all is done

i also read somewhere on this forum (and agree with this from personal experiance) that your weight loss would probably begin being noticeable after loosing about 10% of your weight, which is roughly 30 pounds! so dont worry about your trip in december. the new you would be not only very noticeable but also glowing and healthy!
 
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You can do it sasony! i used to be up there with you at above two hundred, but trust me with a little will power anything can get done, so all you need to do is get a diet and workout program and stick with it! Tell us about the details, we'd love to hear!
 
I wish you the best of luck, and I know if you really want this you can do it because thats the mind set I had to be in before I started a diet that actually worked for me. It's working because I want it to.
I do agree with everyone that 6 pounds is a little unrealistic. You will lose the most weight the first 2 weeks usually, so don't be disappointed when the scale says you've only lost 2. Thats how I was for so long, I had such high goals, I would get bummed out rather than seeing the real deal. I was LOSING 2 pounds a week, but I saw it as a failure and would get upset and eventually fail my diet.
Plus, the slower it comes off, the more likely it is to stay off, the healthier it is for you AND the better you will look after!
 
hey girl...

i feel your pain :)

like you, i have always thought that all my problems were caused by my weight. but guess what? i have lost weight, and my problems are still there. it's not my weight that caused them after all. IT WAS ME!! i have always been so afraid that people are judging me harshly that i have never allowed myself to let loose. i've been so afraid that folks won't accept me that i have never ALLOWED anyone to accept me. i'm not talking about friends necessarily, i'm really talking about guys. i always look at prettier, skinnier girls and think, "well, why would any guy want me when he could have someone like her?" but then, i see girls who are bigger than me and not as pretty, and they have boyfriends, and that reminds me that the reason i don't have a boyfriend and have never been truly loved is because i have never thought i was worthy of it. ANYWAY let me stop rambling...

so you say you always fall off your diet at around 9 or 10 pm? this is my advice: eat every 3 hours throughout the day. i'm sure you've heard that before. but don't eat just anything. make sure you eat things that take a long time for your body to digest, and that way you'll feel full longer. try eating things full of protein and good fats, like nuts, peanut butter, fish, etc. i know, it's all stuff you've probably heard before, but there's a reason for that: it really does work. do your best to stay away from foods that have flour and lots of sugar in them; your body processes those foods far too quickly and it leaves you hungry, so you end up eating waaaay more than you should. don't make too many changes at once, and don't overexert yourself. like others have said in their replies, you don't want to just lose weight for your trip, you want to lose weight for AFTER your trip, too. you're only human, and we can only deal with so many things at once. if i were you, i would focus only on my eating for a few weeks and postpone the exercise until you feel like you have a good handle on your diet, and then start building activity into your day. once you start losing weight, it gets addictive! Sorry i typed so much, and good luck :)
 
Hi everybody!!!

Just to update u on my progress so far. Well, I know I SAID I'll start the diet in July, but so far, I Haven't. I just started going to a Gym (for girls only) this Sunday 10 August and so far I'm HAVING A HORRIBLE TIME OF COURSE!!!!! First day I went there, I felt like I'm in a high school full of bullies. One girl even pointed at me while I was on the first day of exercise and laughed her heart out at how hard I was struggling. I felt horrible of course. But I continued my exercise with the trainer, WHO I DON'T EVEN LIKE HER. I just said I have to just start moving in order to lose the weight and it'll get better in time. But I get frustrated more and more every day I go there. The other girls ask me;" what is your current weight?" Of course I hate to tell them that I'm around 290lb, so I just say no need to say, it is just too much. Then they say;" really, how much, is it 110KG (242lb)". This makes me even sadder; to them the MAXIMUM imaginable number is in this range (240-250). And I feel that they just remind me of HOW LONG IS THE JOURNEY ahead of me. I know I shouldn't be thinking negatively, but the idea of continuing the pain of exercise and the humiliation of comments for 5 or 6 months is killing me, let alone for more than 2 years. It is REALLY sad to be a fat person, especially an obese one like me. Perhaps these feelings are normal in the first week, but I just thought I'd share these emotions with people who understand me and perhaps have been there. Does it EVER get easier in time to do the exercise? Or does it even get tougher? Please guys and girls let me know how was your experience in this regard? How did u get over such feelings (that if you had any like them)?

By the way, I weighed myself yesterday and found out that I'm no longer 132kg (291lb), I guess I lost 1 kg. so now I'm 130.9kg (288lb). I guess I should be excited that I lost around 3lb, but like I said, when I go to the gym and get reminded that I have a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG journey ahead of me. 3lb makes me SAD instead of HAPPY.
 
vonbrynt said:
When I eat, it doesn't feel like I am on a diet, because in my mind I am not. This is just the way I want to eat. I am never hungry, I have a ton of new found energy. I still allow myself the occasional cookie or dessert at an event because that is what we do in life. If you deprive yourself of everything, you are doomed to fail.
Good luck in your journey, We are all here help each other.
Click to expand...

This bit of info is so completely true.... I believe the success of a diet comes from not thinknig of it as a diet. Don't tell yourself that because last night I ate a piece of chocolate cake I've just ruined all my past efforts... look at it like this- the chocolate cake was yummy, but over the next couple of days what can I do to make up for those calories? It can be as simple as a 20 minute walk for three days. It's all about balance, and because the real world doesn't live off of salads and rice cakes, neither shouls someone trying to get healthy. Everyone has already given you such great advice... all I can add is that every single day counts, whether it's bad or good. I keep to around 1300 cals per day because I also have a lot of weight to lose, but there are days when I'm hungrier, so I eat more. For health reasons, I try never to go below 1200. And guess what? I still have McDonald's every once in a while, but instead of a whole meal, I'll get a chicken wrap and small fries and stick to my water... balance, balance, balance.

To the emotional and self esteem issues... first let me say that these women at your gym are incredibly cruel.... maybe you should join a larger gym, with men and owmen, that has a reputation for attracting all types. I know there are a few gym chains that I refuse to go to because of the typical body-building guys and scantily-clad model looking girls that parade around making you feel worse than before and too embarassed to stick with it. My gym now is very diverse.. perfect bodies to bodies much worse than mine, so it's easy to not get stressed about your appearance there.

But if you keep going to that gym you'll prove to those horrible women that you are willing to work that much harder at something they take for granted, and you'll appreciate the rewards so much more.

For me, as I continue in this, it gets easier day by day to admit where my flaws are.. yesterday I was joking with a coworker about how fat my upper arms are.. something I never would have dared to do even 3 months ago. I've accepted that my body needs a lot of work and let everyone around me know (and I have told EVERYONE) that I'm doing everything in my power to improve it. If you have supportive people in your life, use them.... you'll need that support and you'll need them cheering you on. Oh- before I stop rambling on.... start taking measurements... so many people forget to do this and they focus only on the pounds. If you take weekly measuremetns of hips, thighs, waist, etc.. you'll really start to see some amazing progress that can feel much better than pounds going down on a scale. Best of luck to you... you've already made a huge step in the right direction by coming here.. people here are awesome! :)
 
Assalamualaikum

Im zaharah here... just wanted to say hello to my fellow muslim and wish you a great journey ahead.

My start weight was exactly your weight 132KG. im now at 120.7KG

Im striving to loose more also!
 
Wa'alkum assalam zahra.

Thanks a lot for your support and to all who gave me a good word in my thread. I have been going to the gym since 10 August until now which is for me a GREAT achievement. I didn't last a whole month in a gym in the past. But this time I'm doing what I can. Although I'm still experiencing a hard time in the diet issue, since Muslims now have a holy month called Ramadan and we cook lots of YUMMY things. I only eat once a day though since I'm eating NOT SO HEALTHY stuff. So far I went down to 128kg = 282lbs. some days it goes up to 129 and others it stays in 128kg. I'm just trying to keep it in this range and not get back to 132kg.
In mid October I intend to ATTACK my weight as hard as I can and commit 100% to the diet and the exercise.
Another good news for me is that my expected holiday which was suppose to be in December leaving me only less than 3 months to make a change, is now postponed to March 09 which means I do have more time to be new inshallah.

Anyhow, THANKS AGAIN TO ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL OF U for your help.
 
Same here, its Ramadan and I only eat once a day at breaking of fast. lol!

And most times the food are high in carbs.

And yes, so many yummy food during this time as it only happens once a year and this is the time when you can see and eat food that you had not seen or eaten for a long long time.

I try very very hard to control myself against buying food. Mostly I cook, cause I found out that buying food during the fasting month is the same as shopping when you are hungry, you tend to buy many food and most times, its food you dont really want to eat or too much for you to eat.
 
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