Hello! I'm 19 and a college junior.
When I was younger, I was a bit sedentary and a very normal weight. Starting in high school, when I moved, I started witnessing fluctuations in my weight--I kept packing on the pounds when one day, I realized something: I was fat, and no matter how much I tell myself to be okay with it, it just wasn't healthy, emotionally or physically. I don't want to be proud of being fat, when I KNOW I can be a better person, when I know I can be happier, more carefree.
It got worse when I got to college--to a very very prestigious college in fact. I had everything going for me: I was at a great school, with beautiful (inside and out) friends, great connections, great family... but my insecurity about not being rail thin as almost everyone else made me gain even more weight, so much that the first thought I had when visiting home was, "I hope my parents aren't disappointed."
I didn't have a tough time adjusting in college at all, but there was ALWAYS that horrible something. I'm also Asian--and not to pull out the race and stereotype cards, but I knew that some people referred to me as the "fat, but fun, Asian girl." I wasn't even the "fun, but fat, Asian girl." I was defined as FAT first and everything else followed. And it hurt more than I cared to admit.
My skinny friends (it's worse to be the fat one when you're the ONLY fat one) would never talk about weight around me; and sometimes, my weight was the elephant in the room. People offer me their leftover food at restaurant dinners, because I'd be the only one who finished my huge plate... they didn't even think about it, because how could they possibly know how it feels?
So I've decided, I am DONE with this. I AM strong enough. I hope to join you all in the journey to becoming the super fit people we can become!
With love,
Jackfairy
When I was younger, I was a bit sedentary and a very normal weight. Starting in high school, when I moved, I started witnessing fluctuations in my weight--I kept packing on the pounds when one day, I realized something: I was fat, and no matter how much I tell myself to be okay with it, it just wasn't healthy, emotionally or physically. I don't want to be proud of being fat, when I KNOW I can be a better person, when I know I can be happier, more carefree.
It got worse when I got to college--to a very very prestigious college in fact. I had everything going for me: I was at a great school, with beautiful (inside and out) friends, great connections, great family... but my insecurity about not being rail thin as almost everyone else made me gain even more weight, so much that the first thought I had when visiting home was, "I hope my parents aren't disappointed."
I didn't have a tough time adjusting in college at all, but there was ALWAYS that horrible something. I'm also Asian--and not to pull out the race and stereotype cards, but I knew that some people referred to me as the "fat, but fun, Asian girl." I wasn't even the "fun, but fat, Asian girl." I was defined as FAT first and everything else followed. And it hurt more than I cared to admit.
My skinny friends (it's worse to be the fat one when you're the ONLY fat one) would never talk about weight around me; and sometimes, my weight was the elephant in the room. People offer me their leftover food at restaurant dinners, because I'd be the only one who finished my huge plate... they didn't even think about it, because how could they possibly know how it feels?
So I've decided, I am DONE with this. I AM strong enough. I hope to join you all in the journey to becoming the super fit people we can become!
With love,
Jackfairy