Honestly, what do I say?

M

magnoliajenn

New member
I'm 37 in July. Nevermind, the two kids, the husband, etc. I've been fat all my life. Or at least been made to feel that way. Of course, I look at pics of me at 22 and I think "oh what I wouldn't give". How does that happen? How do I feel just as fat then as I do now and we're talking about me now at LEAST 60 poundes heavier. I can't even blame my kids. Both kids, I lost weight. And not just a little. Lost 32 pounds with my first and 22 with my second.

How do you tell someone who knows it "ALL" about how to lose weight.....how to lose weight? Honestly, what am I missing?

Ah, the past? ACOA? Adult Child of an Alcoholic? Check. Broken home? Check. Narcissistic adult role model? Check. Many many many many years of therapy? Check. Jenny Craig? Weight Watchers? NurtiSystem?HerbaLife? SlimFast? Oprah?, etc., etc., etc., Check, check, check, check, check.

So here I am. My first "forum". Not sure what else to do. Not feeling very optimistic. Lots of want, not much hope. Looking for someone to tell me something new. Not sure what else to do.

Sad in Seattle

Jenn
 
Hi Jenn, and welcome.

Your post did sound terribly sad, but the good thing is, you're here now, and this really is the best place I've ever found to help with losing weight. Take a look around the forum. Here you will find loads of people who are doing what you find hard to imagine at the moment. We're losing weight. It can be difficult (which is why we use a support forum), it does take a lot of willpower, but it's not rocket science. If we can do it, so can you.

Here's the new thing you wanted to hear. (It might not be new. You've probably heard it before but not wanted to listen because it doesn't sound as exciting as the fad diets out there. Most of us have been there too.) Losing weight is a simple equation. Energy in (through food and drink) has to be less than energy out (through day to day living and exercise). That's "all" there is to it.

So, if you use 2500 calories a day, but only take in 2000, you will lose weight.
If you use 2500 calories a day, but take in 3000, you will gain weight.

I'm not going to pretend it's easy. The best, most reliable, most sustainable way to lose weight is to see it as a lifestyle change. Change your diet (a little bit at a time is easiest) so you are eating healthily for life. Start exercising (build up gradually to something you know you can stick with) so you will be fit for life. Don't look at it as a diet. Look at it as a new life of health and fitness. That's the most reliable way to lose weight, and to feel better about yourself.

Start out with little steps. Swap one unhealthy snack a day for a piece of fruit. Start walking short journeys instead of using the car. (These are just examples, there are loads more ideas dotted around these forums.)

The most important thing (I think) is to set yourself small, achievable goals. Every time you succeed, you will feel better about yourself. The better you feel, the easier you will find it to achive the next goal. It's a snowball effect.

Hang around here, get to know some people. Maybe start a diary in the diary forum if you feel like it. Before you know it, you'll be starting to feel inspired and positive and ready to get rid of that extra weight.

You CAN do it.
 
wow....sad in seattle....wow.

First things first---the weight isn't going to go anywhere if you're so down on yourself. Put away the past and look toward the future.

Next: Make a game plan...what is your goal, what's your exercise plan, how are you going to change your eating habits, etc....

After all of your planning---get to it! Make it happen and don't let anything get in your way, no excuses, no sadness, no past failures, no kids, no husband, no this, no that....push forward with faith that you'll do it and don't ever look back.

No more sadness, no more regret...just do it!
 
I'm not sure that there's anything else that could be added to what Alibran and Kaitie had to say. I wholeheartedly agree with them. Put the past behind you and look towards the new you! You can do it, and we're here to help you every step of the way. Welcome to WLF! And good luck to you! I know you can do it.
 
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