Hello there,
I have struggled long with a weight problem, so believe me, I know where you're coming from! In response to your first point, I'd say that basically you've finished tricking your body. What I mean by that is, you can fool it into thinking that you should be at a certain weight. If you go through an extended period where you drastically change your intake from before, without modifying the amount of exercise you do with it, it will take a while for the body to realise what you're doing. It thinks "hey, this is different, maybe it'll stop soon" as bodies seem to like consistency.
Motivation is always a problem. One of the biggest factors i've contended with is the influence of other people. They can make or break your own goals if your will isn't like steel, so maybe you can get them involved by confiding in them that you'd like their support and help whilst you go through this. It's always easier when you have others to build you back up again if you momentarily fall over.
Diets are basically subjective as far as i'm concerned - you need to go with what's right for you. There's the foodwheel information here, which explains the proportions of what you should be taking in, and my advice would be just to stick to this proportion but to cut your intake by 500 to 1000 calories below what you currently have to begin with. Then keep edging it down until you reach below your Recommended Daily Allowance. Make sure not to take in too little though, as this can shut down the metabolism and squash one of the biggest helpers in weight loss.
As far as your family goes, I'd say it might be interesting to have them proceed on the same diet as you. If you have small children this is a good time to begin teaching them the right way to eat - the earlier you start the better they will be in the future. One useful tool one mother told me was to always keep the house stocked with sweet things... like small choccy bars and cakes. The kids can have them whenever they like then, and the "treat" factor is removed. If you can teach them that food is just food, then they stand a much better chance of leading a healthier lifestyle. If you also teach them the value of a balanced diet, they'll be very grateful in the long run
Also, if you begin on a period of weight loss, yes you will expand before you contract. This is not putting on weight, this is the body preparing to metabolise the fat on your frame. This is a really good sign because if it happens that soon, it means that the whole process won't take as long. Basically when fat is stored on the body it is built up in highly compressed layers... when you begin to lose the outermost begins to expand so that it can be broken down (with water and burning energy)
Exercise is also important. Cardiovascular is the most important - raise your heartrate and move that body around! Your body has gotten used to being slightly unfit... so it will take more effort initially to make yourself fit again. Thats why when you start on an exercise regime you always end up feeling slightly pained lol.
This is mostly what i've found from my own experience and what others have told me that seems to fit...
Hope this helps,
