Hey hey keeping it going!

panajane

panajane

New member
All right. If I am posting a weight loss journal on a weight loss forum it means I am pretty damned serious, no? Indeed. Anyways, brief history and outline.

I was always an active child and teenager, climbing trees, in track and field, soccer, cheerleader, softball, paddling a cayuco (something similar to crew), but it all went downhill when I graduated from high school and worked in a call center. Little by little every year I gained weight with my relatively sedentary lifestyle. I didn't pay it any mind because I was still in OK shape, not overweight or anything.

After the call center thing I worked as a flight attendant and gained even more weight because of the weird hours in which I was eating, plus I didn't really make time for working out.

Two years ago I got a scholarship to study in Chile where I lived with my boyfriend who was also in college. We lived together and my unhealthy eating habits started shining through. I did zero exercise, got Seasonal Affective Disorder and ate my way to my heaviest weight which was 176 lbs. on my 5'5 1/2" frame. None of my clothes fitted me, I was unhappy and antisocial with my obvious weight gain being the culprit.

Last year I was able to lose some of the weight, but then I learned how to bake bread (OMG) and cakes and brownies and whatever other delicious pastry you can think of which was a blessing and a curse at the same time because I regained some of the weight I had lost (before learning how to bake I was weighing in at 160 lbs.).

Anyways, this past Christmas of 2008 I was weighing in at 169 and because I never ever want to weigh 176 lbs. I started watching what I ate and started working out again (which I actually enjoy doing funnily enough). I've been weighing myself every morning since the 6th of January 2009, which does help me keep aware of what I put in my mouth as I tend to be a mindless eater.

Currently I weigh 166 lbs. which means I've lost 3 lbs. and which makes me happy. My goal weight is 140 lbs. more or less, but the reality is that I want to feel good about myself again. I realize that I am never going to be a stick thin figure (I have a medium body type), but I do want to feel good about myself, toned, flexible and in shape.

My major problem is not working out, my problem is that I love sweets and junk food, coca cola, BEER, bread, fast food, pizza, the list goes on. All the crap that is terrible for your body I love eating. I don't like most veggies, though most fruit is OK. I am not a salad eater, and I am not drinking nearly enough water.

This has been long, but to cut to the chase, I am determined, I am keeping positive and I am curbing my impulse for junk food. I have been working out almost every day or at least three times a week by brisk walking, learning how to jog since my stamina is basically zero, stair climbing, and I have been doing some Winsor Pilates dvd's about two or three times a week (hey there flexibility I missed you).

There you have it. I am going to write about it because I've always had a journal so keeping a weight loss journal isn't much different, plus it helps me be aware of what I am eating.

I have only been a member of this forum for a few days, but from what I have read I have already gained so much inspiration and desire to lose weight and get fit again and for that I want to thank all of you. Thank you!

Cheers,
Jane
 
Hey Girlie!!! WELCOME!!! :hurray: So glad you joined...

...your frame & weight is very similar to mine....

...I am sure you will reach your goals, and YOU DO SOUND very determined...CONGRATS for that! And yes..to be here, YOU ARE SERIOUS! ;)

...I love the Windsor Pilates videos with the ball...they are great..and really make you sore when you do them a lot! Keep up the great work!

...As far as the BEER, and the BREAD, and the Carbs...OMG...I love them too! LOL...but yup...that's how I got here too!! WE CAN DO THIS!!!

...and now, I realized, that like you , I don't eat as much veggies as I should, so veggie vitamins it is!!! :D!!! Much easier! ;) though I still eat em!!!

...I WISH YOU LUCK!!! I'll be cheering for you !!! :cheers2:
 
Good day today

I don't know if this is where I am supposed to keep writing the journal entries, but whatever, here it goes.

Breakfast: Bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios with a whole banana cut into pieces, whole milk.

Lunch: White rice with guandu, fried plantain, two small pieces of pork. Oh and the crumb of a brownie because I couldn't help it.

Dinner: Bowl of cut oranges, bowl of Fruity Cheerios with whole milk.

Exercise wise, I did 20 minutes of pilates that focused on the abdomen area which left me a hurtin' in all the right places. Yowww, but I do see that my flexibility is increasing (I can now bend at the waist and touch the palms of my hand flat on the ground). At 5 I went to play ultimate frisbee and got my ass handed to me on a silver plate. I was running back and forth out of breath trying to keep up my defense, but hell it was so hard to do. Plus the sudden sprinting on uneven ground messed up my knee (this is the third or fourth time I injure my left knee, twice with soccer, once on the trampoline).

Tonight I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and cried a few times here and there. I thought it was quite touching and sentimental, but not overly sweet. It is super long so beware that water you're chugging down. I do feel kind of proud of myself because I had zero munchies with me and ate not a single popcorn. I got out of the movie around midnight and di not go out to eat, which is something I would have done usually. All in all it's been a terrific day. I just hope the scale reflects that tomorrow morning. Nothing worse than feeling so upbeat about your control and weight and seeing that the scale says otherwise.

:hurray: I feel good but oh so tired. I need a day when I can sleep in till 12.
 
:iagree: Yeah, and it's all mindless eating! I don't think people even really enjoy the snacks they eat while watching movies.
 
Bum Knee, get a job!

165!!! :party:

Today I weighed in at 165, which means only 10 lbs. to go till my current goal weight of 155. Wooooo . I hope it wasn't a fluke. Wasn't able to exercise today because I hurt my left knee playing ultimate frisbee yesterday so I had to keep off it for the day and keep it in a brace. Got into a huge fight with my mom where I ended up eating a chocolate chip cookie out of anger (such a rebel). I didn't do too well int he eating or working out depo today, but hey tomorrow is another day and I plan to behave (there should be an emoticon of a little smiley dude shoving donuts into his mouth, 10 at a time Cookie Monster style).

Here's a little something something I wrote just now which sort of resembles who I am, but is not a direct biography or whatever. As I told a friend, this is and is not about me (there is some adult language so skip if you're sensitive oh and there is also some words in Spanish which you can google for meaning).

Don't Give In To The Munchies!

Girl-woman lays on her bed with her laptop on her belly typing on blogger a story about herself. She is pale skinned, with smatterings of brown freckles covering her skin, wild originally brown hair, now dirty red-brown, green yellow eyes of differing intensities and rose red lips, small but plump. She has MSn running on the laptop, a couple of chat windows open speaking to would be suitors and friends. She also has a video of herself running in the background. In it she is stoned and raving on and on about palo santo and drawing signs and lines on herself with the burnt charcoal ends of the palo santo (Holy Stick? Hollystick? Hollywood? Holy Holly?).

The story is this: this girl of pleasant curves is on a motherfucking diet. Although it's not a diet per se, she is controlling what she places in her rosebud mouth. She's passed from being pleasantly plump to being overweight and a pretty fat. God, everything, anything but a pretty fat. You know, the girl who has a pretty face "if only she weren't so fat". Gorda bonita. Gorda con ritmo. Pero gorda igual! So this girl is on a mission to lose some weight, gain some muscle and tone, and return to her original size 7/8 jean size (Sir Mix Alot made that song for her). She wants to look bangin' and she just doesn´t feel it when all her jeans don´t fit her ass and she has double chins and C cups for heaven´s sake! Ever has she ever been a size C, so the weight gain is a blessing and a curse. Still though, that ass has to be dealt with.

She gets up from the bed to slither out of the jeans and change into her pj´s, but not before she checks herself out in the mirror, looking at her flaws, looking at the results that working out have brought forth, picturing what she could look like if she sticks this diet and exercising out (image: HOT). In that moment when she is putting on her t-shirt that serves as her pijama she realizes that if she stands up again she will have no control over herself and amble straight towards the white cheddar popcorn in the closet (anybody say Smartfood?) like a hummingbird to a papo. The munchies were eating away at her will, like vultures fighting over the last remnants of a carcass, like mosquitoes swarming a tourist. They had to be stopped. Immediately.

She lays down on the bed with the heavy realization on her shoulders that her munchies were strong, but her will charged into action and refused that shit. There is a goal, a meta, a reason why she is controlling her maw and that reason is stronger than any horde of munchies could ever be. This bitch had water and she was willing to feel a bit hungry in order to look good. Pass the water, girl on a mission.
 
Hey there emotional eater

I am not going to even get into how off the wagon i have fallen. I have fallen and I can't reach my brownie. Ughhhhhhhhh, stress makes me so hungry, my mother = stress = emotional eating = falling behind and gaining weight. On top of it my knee is still hurting and I don't want to do anything that might set me even further behind. *sigh* Tomorrow is Saturday and I hope to keep my mouth and emotions in check. :piggy:

It's hard to keep focused on what you put into your mouth when I am stressed out and anxious and freaking the hell out. Then I can't even do exercise to get rid of that energy so it envelops me and I become this terrible self pity person which I hate and don't even recognize.

I need some motivation. :banghead:
 
163!!!

I'm down to 163 lbs. miraculously. I've been drinking a lot of water, working out as much as possible (though last week I only worked out once or twice because my knee was ailing me) a minimum of 30 minutes of brisk walking- jogging, 20 minutes of pilates, and controlling my mouth (that's the killer!). I switched from beer to vodka with cranberry (and also cutting down my alcohol intake, i.e. two vodka and cranberry's instead of say 4 or 5 beers). I am three pounds shy of my current goal weight of 160 lbs. Yesterday I was able to run/jog a full circle (though to be honest it killed me) around the palm trees. My goal is to be able to run three of those laps and not want to hang myself off the palm trees.

I have been building up my stamina by doing the Couch to 5k running plan found here: . It has helped me a ton. I'm still doing pilates twice a week (three times if I feel bold and find the time). I also bought some workout DVD's via amazon that haven't arrived yet, but I am so excited to receive. I think it's time for a workout change. Kind of bored by the pilates.

I haven't been going crazy during the weekends, though I do allow indulgences just as long as when the week starts up again I control my food intake (all work and no play makes me want to gorge myself). My chocolate and sweets intake is at an all time low, so much so that when I went to a baby shower and ate a couple of sweets I felt a bit sick. I suppose my body or palate is not used to eating so much sweets anymore. My favorite munchies are cheddar popcorn by Smartfood brands. It's yummy and not as fattening as chips.

My problem is that I feel discouraged if I fall off the wagon, but the thing to remember is that I'm human and slip ups are bound to occur. I just need to stay focused and not treat myself so harshly.

I'm on a mission! :hurray:
 
The Biggest Loser: Cardio Max

I am dead beat! I bought three work out dvd's: The Biggest Loser Cardio Max, Biggest loser Sculpt and Tone and Jillian Michaels 30 day weight loss. I just finished doing of the pre-programmed cardio max sets and it was killer. I could hardly keep up and had to stop once in awhile and catch my breath. Damn Bob! But I did sweat a whole bunch, so I imagine if I do this a couple of times a week it should help out. If you're looking for a work out dvd that slays you and at the same time makes you feel good, this is it.

I am still at 163 more or less. From here I hope to go down to 160 by next week. I can't believe I've been doing this so well. I'm still amazed at my will power and my control, things I didn't have before. I'm also really proud of myself because I had a very emotional week (issues with the ex bf) and yet I managed to not go off on an eating rampage. Good job, self! The ex has also been losing weight and gaining muscles. Hmmm, we couldn't lose weight when we were together, but we break up and we both get hotter, how odd is that. Anyways, I am so excited. I feel good and I am getting more and more into shape and I love it. I was looking at some jeans in my closet that haven't fit in ages, and I hope to one day be able to fit into them, all with a natural diet and exercise.

Go me! Go me! Go meeeeeeee! :party:

By the way, Happy Valentine's Day to everyone (though to be honest it is kind of a bullshit holiday,no? If you love someone why not show them that year round instead of forced into it by the media and Hallmark?).

Next weekend is Carnavales and I think I'll be heading off into the interior to celebrate it in Pedasi :auto:. I hope I don't fall off the wagon. I need to keep up the good work.

I bought a box of Quaker Chewy granolas because they are only 100 calories per bar so it seems kind of like a good deal. My grandma is enjoying them as well since she also keeps an eye on her weight.

I'm going to shower now and buy a cookie sheet and make some valentine's day chocolate chip cookies for my friends. Wooooooo!
 
Fluctiation

I've been fluctuating between 163 and 163.5. I can't wait for the day when I am 160 lbs. Geez, can we just do this already?! Yesterday I did half an hour of the strength training biggest loser DVD and then half an hour of the cardio max biggest loser DVD. It was hard. I was sweaty and tired and I hate Bob! I don't hate him all the time, just when he's on the TV kicking my ass. This weekend is a long weekend because of carnivals. I plan on going to the beach on Sunday and staying till whenever. Tuesday I think maybe. I hope I can control my mouth and not go overboard with the munchies or the drinks. I already switched from beer to vodka, but still I think the alcohol doesn't do any wonders for my weight loss. I also ate a cookie yesterday. Oh the guilt over a measly cookie when before I could shove a million into my mouth and not feel the slightest bit guilty.

I've been going through some really tough emotional problems right now regarding my ex boyfriend and I'm proud of myself for not going the emotional eater way (i.e. a tub of ice cream, cookie dough, and a movie like The Notebook or some similar girly flick). It's hard to deal with crap, but I also feel like I am cleansing myself emotionally to be able to deal with everything with a clear view. New starts are scary, but they're also kind of fun and exciting. I've been dealing with the break up by exercising my ass off. When the feelings of melancholy start overwhelming me I put on my sneakers and run until I can't breathe. Lift weights till my arms are sore and feel like they want to fall off. Remaining active is the important step in a break up. Go out with your friends, watch movies, listen to upbeat music, anything to keep your mind off of things.

I have been noticing the changes in my body; my legs are toning up and I am seeing the muscle ripple underneath the fat, my abs are poking through, strengthening up, my face is already a big more angular. Small steps! I don't expect to lose a ton of weight all at once, but I am happy that my body is accepting the changes gracefully. By the end of February I would like to be at 160 lbs. That might not be all too realistic, but hey I need some goals! I need to visualize my goals, visualize myself without the extra weight and toned and firm. Visualization is very important as well as a positive attitude.

I don't know when I'll be posting again, but have a nice weekend! Stick to your diets and if you cheat do it quickly and get back on the wagon!
 
OMG - You are doing SUCH a good job dealing with the break-up!!

Keep going girl!!

Nothing can beat getting back into shape!! Being at your ideal weight is almost, I say "almost" - better than sex!!! haha..

I'm sure that the scale will keep you motivated esp the hunger to see lower numbers!
Also, you should load up on those weightwatchers cakes and cookies - I eat one for dessert or a cookie for my day snack! ONLY 90 calories! :)

All the Best and have a great weekend!
 
Measurement Sunday

I weighed myself today and I'm at 162.5. Yeay! Although I do feel as though I fell a bit off the wagon by having a caramel filled churro after 8:00 p.m. But on the other side I felt as though I deserved it because I did the Jillian Michaels workout DVD on beginner and man oh man did it kick my assssssss (a friend warned me about this). She does a sort of HIIT based on cardio, strength and abs (3 minutes cardio, 2 minutes strength and 1 minute abs) all one after another, no pausing no nothing just go go go go go. I do prefer Jillian to Bob. Bob is just so peppy! And upbeat! And that is the last thing I want to hear while I am getting my ass kicked is someone so happy and upbeat.

Even though I cheat here and there, I do feel as though I am doing such a good job with my cravings and my impulses. I have never been a person who had much willpower, and yet now I have a fountain of it. A veritable fountain of being able to say no to something when I am not hungry and definitely don't need it. I have always envied my friends who had that ability and now I have it, too.

The thing is, I really want this change. I used to be in shape, I used to be in my weight range and I used to feel good about myself and my body. But I took it all for granted and didn't realize any of this till I couldn't fit into my clothes anymore and had to buy new clothes. And not even then did I realize quite how overweight I had gotten. I was eating emotionally, or eating out of boredom, or eating because I just didn't get it.

I do wish someone had sat me down and told me seriously and without wanting to hurt my feelings something along the lines of, Look you've been gaining too much weight and you need to cut it out. You need to take care of yourself and not eat so much junk food. But then again, I don't think I was ready to hear that or change. I guess change comes from within. You've got to want to change and I do.

Mini Goals:
- Run a couple of laps nonstop.
- Swim a couple of laps nonstop.
- Fit into size 30 jeans (my old ones).
- Current Weight Goal: 160 lbs.
 
That's EXACTLY right woman!!! I feel the SAME WAY!!! Change comes from within :iagree:...that is the only place that it can come from for it to REALLY inspire permanent change as well!!!

...I'm so glad that you have that fountain of will power now!! Me too :D!!! I understand you when you say, you used to not be that woman, cause I didn't have will power either.....I am almost shocked at the woman I am becoming....especially when exercise, eating good, and NO DRINKING come about!!! ....:eek:!!!

...I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! :party: You are MELTING AWAY!! CONGRATS on those pounds lost!!! In no time you'll be at 155!!!!.....Especially if you keep doing Jillians workouts....!!! I have the Box Set.... and MANNNN....she is HARD CORE!!! :svengo: Keep it up!!!
 
Miss Piggy

I pigged out Sunday-Tuesday since it was the carnival holidays and what have you. I felt super guilty the next day and made the mistake of weighing myself and I was back at 166 (lesson learned: never weigh yourself after a pig out). I almost cried. It depressed me. But then I looked on the internet and a couple of forums mentioned how people have water weight and sodium and bla bla bla the days after a big pig out and the false weight is supposed to go down to the regular weight after a couple of days (which it did thank God).

I am now at 162 lbs. Little by little I've been getting at the weight I want to be at. I am learning how to control my mouth, but it's a process. I noticed that when I don't weigh myself everyday it's easy to lose the connection between food and calories and how they affect my weight. But I also need to learn how to control myself when there is no where to weigh myself.

Last night I tried to do a sort of HIIT by running up the administration steps three times. It was tough. My bum knee is bothering me a bit.

In regards to diet, I haven't been eating specifically diet oriented food. In the mornings I usually have a bowl of say Fitness cereal with a whole banana and whole fat milk (because I haven't been able to find my fave brand of skim milk at the supermarket), four hours after breakfast I have lunch which is whatever my family is having, but smaller, way small (whatever carbohydrate is smaller than a fist and a protein the size of a deck of cards), after another four hours goes by I eat dinner which could be a sandwhich or yogurt with wheat germ or whatever. I am not eating anything after 8:00 p.m. (though sometimes I have to for whatever reason). Sometimes I snack on Chewey granola bars because they are only 100 calories per bar. I drink as much water as I can as I am really thirsty nowadays and because it keeps the hunger pangs away. My body has already gotten very used to eating every four hours. I'm quite proud of it. I have been taking a green tea pill that is supposed to boost metabolism and keep hunger pangs away, but I don't know if it's a placebo or if it really works.

Curious thing I have noticed now that I am eating less junk food, is that my tongue is a lot more sensitive to sweet food as I can't eat as much of it in one sitting, or I start to feel ill if I eat too much of it. I can't believe how much sugary crap I used to eat without even blinking my eye.

I went bowling last night with a ton of svelte, thin, beautiful girls and although I do not feel ugly or anything of the sort, I did kind of feel like the fatass of the group. It's not a nice feeling and it just makes me want to get to my goal all the more (which is not impossible!).

Yesterday I was also looking at both pictures of me at my heaviest (176 lbs.) and me in 2005 (I don't know what the weight was but I looked pretty damn good). I want to go back to my weight of 2005. It was probably between 140-145 lbs. had zero double chin, my face was not as round as it is now and I looked pretty damn good.

Fall down, pick yourself up again and keep going. :piggy:
 
160.5?

I weighed in this morning at 160.5. It might have been my very sparse diet from Saturday, or maybe it's real weight loss. I guess I won't know until tomorrow morning when I weigh myself. It's enough to make me feel as if, yes I am losing weight, gradually, but it is happening.

Today I played Ultimate Frisbee for about 2 hours. Enough to make my knee throb a bit and enough to burn some calories and sweat sweat sweat. I am not very good at it, but I am getting better with each passing game that I attend. I just wish I could run faster! I do notice that I am not as out of shape as the first time I played; this time I was able to keep up and not feel like I was dying 15 minutes into the game.

My friends and family members have been noticing my 7 lb. weight loss and have been commenting on it. It makes me feel good. It makes me feel even more determined. Again, I don't know where I am getting the will power from, but maybe I just want to look smoking hot and rub it in my ex's face, or maybe I just want to fit into all my old clothes. I think I am really determined to go back to a certain weight and stay there forever. My problem was that I never really had a ceiling weight (you know the weight that you cannot pass), but now that I am losing weight I know at what weight I will never ever want to be at again (I should probably not pass 155 lbs.).

I have noticed some changes in my body: my belly has gotten significantly smaller, my butt and thighs have gotten slimmer as well. I wish my arms would start getting thinner and more toned, they are definitely problem areas.

I had a nice weekend, nothing very significant happened and I didn't pig out. I do allow myself to be more flexible in my eating habits during weekends, but this weekend I didn't really indulge myself. My sweet cravings seem to be diminishing.

I'm off to bed! I hope everyone is accomplishing their goals; it feels so damn good to be on the correct road, as long and had as it may be.
 
I joined the birthday challenge

(I am posting this here as well as it outlines the goals I want to reach within a set amount of time)

Panajane's Personal Birthday Challenge!

Start Date: January 6, 2009
Upcoming Birthday: August 1, 2009
Duration of Challenge: 7 months

Starting Weight: 170 lbs.
Goal Weight: 140 lbs.
Total Pounds to Lose: 30
Average Pounds Per Week to Lose: 1 lb. more or less

Checkpoint 1: March 6, 2009
Goal Weight: 161 lbs.
Weigh IN:
(Loss/Gain):

Checkpoint 2: May 6, 2009
Goal Weight: 153 lbs.
Weigh IN:
(Loss/Gain):

Checkpoint 3: July 6, 2009
Goal Weight: 145 lbs.
Weigh IN:
(Loss/Gain):

Checkpoint 4: August 1, 2009 Happy Birthday to Me!!!
Goal Weight: 140 lbs.
Weigh IN:
(Loss/Gain):


Personal Reward: Bikini pictures! Haha! :party:
 
It's Official

I have lost 10 lbs.! I can now say that I have achieved my first Goal Weight. This is despite the fact that I still eat sweets once in awhile (moderation is key here), I am not on any diet plan whatsoever, and I am still drinking booze (I did switch from beer to vodka, though). Today I made lemon meringue pie to celebrate (I will only have a small piece).

It feels good that my clothes are fitting me loose (some pants are even falling down if I don't wear a belt), and yesterday I tried on a dress that hadn't fit me in a longgggg time and it fits perfectly (even a little loose around the bum area). I am feeling more energized and svelte and Sunday I was able to play 3 hours of mostly non stop ultimate frisbee without feeling like I was dying. It's a long road, but I am getting there! :party:

To top it off, I've been getting second interviews in the majority of places that I have been interviewed at. I am feeling really good right now. I want to continue on this road until I am at my goal.
 
156!

Truth be told, I have sort of neglected my weight loss blog thing, but the good news is that I have not neglected my weight loss. I am down to 156lbs. The funny thing is that I lost it without even trying. I'm playing ultimate frisbee about twice a week and that really helps me work up a sweat. Also I am working at a hostel where I sweat my ass off every single day because of the lack of air conditioning. Still, it's exciting to see my body change, to fit into clothes that hadn't fit in forever, and to feel a bit more confident in a bikini. What I find funny is that I haven't even been trying to lose weight, I just watch what I eat most of the time and do active things like walk, jog, and play sports. When I do fall off the healthy eating wagon I don't despair, I just dust myself off and start up again. I am really trying to change my eating habits for life, not just to look good, but also to feel good and to be capable of more things.

Exciting things are afoot! :hurray:
 
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