HelloDolly223
New member
Today is the first day for me here posting. I have been reading the posts here often. I was 145-155lbs forever. Then in 2005 I was in a terrible relationship that put my depression into a tail spin. I ate and slept most of the year. I also ballooned up to 245lbs. Over the last year I have gone down to 220ish. Two months ago, I got down to 203lbs. I was almost to my goal of getting under 200. I can’t say for sure where I lost my footage but I have gone up to 223lbs. This is the second time I have been almost to my goal and lost it. Some would call it self sabotage.
I do know that my eating binges have a lot to do with my past of not ever having enough food and I “prove†to myself that I can do anything today by eating anything that I want. This became a rebellious act when I was in the horrible relationship when he tried to control me. Self- destructive – very. But that relationship has been over since 2008. I am in a different relationship today and there is none of that. It is an amazingly healthy relationship!!
I need a place where I have to be accountable to others. I don’t want to do a Jenny Craig or other in person diet program, because I won’t buy their food. I want to learn how to eat regular food permanently. I don’t discuss my weight with anyone but myself. I use a calorie counter on my iPhone and it helps when I use it. I don’t know why I can’t get passed this. I never weighted this month with any of my pregnancies.
So today I am here, with others that understand. I hope that being a part of this will provide me support and accountability. I need someone to ask me every Monday if I blew my diet over the weekend. I need someone to ask me if I did my exercise for the week. See if I KNOW that someone is going to ask me, I will do it. No one is asking me anymore and so I am blowing it. I love seeing all the positive stories here. I also hope to provide support to others and encouragement. Thank you in advance!!!!!
I do know that my eating binges have a lot to do with my past of not ever having enough food and I “prove†to myself that I can do anything today by eating anything that I want. This became a rebellious act when I was in the horrible relationship when he tried to control me. Self- destructive – very. But that relationship has been over since 2008. I am in a different relationship today and there is none of that. It is an amazingly healthy relationship!!
I need a place where I have to be accountable to others. I don’t want to do a Jenny Craig or other in person diet program, because I won’t buy their food. I want to learn how to eat regular food permanently. I don’t discuss my weight with anyone but myself. I use a calorie counter on my iPhone and it helps when I use it. I don’t know why I can’t get passed this. I never weighted this month with any of my pregnancies.
So today I am here, with others that understand. I hope that being a part of this will provide me support and accountability. I need someone to ask me every Monday if I blew my diet over the weekend. I need someone to ask me if I did my exercise for the week. See if I KNOW that someone is going to ask me, I will do it. No one is asking me anymore and so I am blowing it. I love seeing all the positive stories here. I also hope to provide support to others and encouragement. Thank you in advance!!!!!