Hello Everyone! Looking to change....

[Maryanne]

Hello everyone! As you can tell I am new here to the forums. I am really looking for information, help and support to start my weight loss journey and to change my life for the better.

A little about myself..

I am 33 years old, married for 15 years to a wonderful and very understanding husband. He is my main reason for wanting to better myself, so we can have a long healthy life together.
I have been a little overweight growing up, but nothing major. When I was 17 and getting married I was around 200 pounds. After I got married I starting gaining weight and it hasent stopped. I was very active growing up. I was a tomboy out doing everything I could. I always seen myself as strong willed...but here lately..not so much as this weight has taken my life away from me.
In 1997 I had my first miscariage and went through a bad case of depression. I actually quit collage do to this. ( A very bad mistake I made) and I closed a small business I had. After that I have been obsessed over having a family. Failed each and every time. Then in 2000 my doctor ran blood work and told me I had hypothyroidism. So they started me on synthyroid. To me there was NO help or change from the medicine. I still had depression and kept gaining weight.
In 2001-2002 I stayed close to my sister who had ovarian cancer and stayed with her to the day she lost her battle. This in return caused my father to have a massive stroke that left him paralized on his right side. So every since then I have moved my parents nextdoor to us and I have been taking care of them every since. To make things worse in 2009 I went to the doctor for pain in my right side and in 3 days later I was doing cancer testing/ultrasounds and was scheduled for major surgery! They found a large cantalope sized tumor that had grown that large in 3 months, and had taken over my right overy and tube. Not to mention doing damage to everything inside. My cancer markers were just below the line for surgery and so the doctor cut me from above my belly button all the way down. I had Hundreds of staples and 5 huge tension sutures. It took a couple of months to be able to get somewhat back to normal. Still today the path lab at Mayo clinic and Cleaveland clinic can not pinpoint exactly what the tumor was. There is still a "study" going on...or at least that is what my doctor said last month.
My husbands grandfather had a stroke and needed 24/hour care. So I was trying my best to take care of our house and my husband, my parents and my husbands grandfather at the same time. I was stressed! Come to find out I was pregnant!!! We were thrilled. BUT this was short lived. I lost the baby at 3 months. The doctors said due to stress.
So... this brings me to where I am now. Confused and always worried about whats going to happen next. I am so tired of not being all I can be... I am loosing myself in this body. No one is willing to help me ( besides my husband of course) My doctors really could care less about my weight. When I go into the office they want me to start an HCG diet that will cost $700 per week. Our insurance wont pay for that! I told her I couldnt afford it and she told me " your next step is bypass then". I NEED to find a new family doctor!
Since november I have gained 47 pounds! I have been trying to eat more heathier.. alot of vegies..no junk food.. quit drinking soda and stopped eating bread of any kind. I still continue to gain weight. So as depressing as it is..I am now at 354 pounds and feel like giving in at times. So I found this forum. And I am here hoping to gain some insight on how others are loosing weight and getting heathier...and to gain support on my journey.

Sorry if this seemed long. LOL. I tend to run on sometimes.

 

[amy1985]

Hi, and welcome

Sorry to hear about everything you've been through. That's really tough, I can't begin to understand how hard it must have been.

The good news is that weight loss is something you can do on your own (including with an underactive thyroid- I've had one since I was 13. Although if you've felt no change, do you need your thryoid function tested? When my thyroid function gets adjusted it gives me life again). It's all about eating less calories than you burn. I used to do what you're doing- "eating healthy", but it was only until I started keeping track of my calories that I started losing weight (but different things work for different people).

I'd recommend using a BMR and maintenance calorie calculator, such as the one found here, to help you work out how much you should be eating a day: (this is taken from the website of one of the most prominent members here). Unless you have another medical condition that's stopping you from losing weight, eating around that number (it's an estimate, but it's a good start outside without intensive medical attention that most of us can't get) should help you to lose weight (but you should never eat under 1200 calories as a grown woman, 1800 if you are or might become pregnant, or be in too much of a deficit- don't go any more than 1000 below the number recommended to you as you risk slowing your metabolism).

Check out the forums- the stickies in particular have a lot of very useful information. I'd also recommend checking out the diary section, as it'll give you some ideas of how other people are going about their weight loss.

Best of luck

 

[fortyfour]

Hi Maryanne. Welcome to the forum.

Indeed you have had a very hard trot. Its no wonder you sound like you have just about run out of ideas and energy but here you are asking for help and willing to try anything. I hope you find you have come to the right place and I hope you can make this place work for you.

I strongly second Amy's opinion of using calorie counting to help you with your weight loss. Start a diary in the right section of this forum. Start recording everything pertaining to your efforts and we others will start reading your diary and supporting you. You will see.

You may not start off perfectly but you will work it all out pretty quickly if you are keen and committed. eg about teh BMR, calorie counting, what to eat and so on. Just start.

Answer the questions in the how to do this thread if you think it will help.

I don't count calories but i have done it before and that helps me now. I do pay attention to how many calories are in things and I don't eat things that high in calories. And i use portion management and various other things.

It does rather sound like you need a new doctor though maybe she was just trying to shock you into taking action with her comment about the bypass. I don't know what an HCG diet is but I don't think you should have to pay a fortune to go on a diet and lose weight. You can do it for free with us here.

I've also got hypothyroidism. I don't think one should expect a sudden loss of weight once going on the medication. I think if you are very overweight you will have to use weight loss methods. But if you think your medication is not working, then you might need to try a different sort. Its easy to know if your medication is working or not. YOu should have been having blood tests regularly, especially in the beginning so the doctor can assess your TSH levels. If they are normal and if you are not showing any other symptoms such as hair loss, deepening voice, dry skin, constipation and all sorts of other horrid things, then it must be working for you. If its only the weight you still have then that must be due to other factors. That's what i believe anyway. And given all the stresses you've been having to deal with, its really not surprising that you have continued to put on weight.

Read various threads on the forum. Read Amy's and mine and what we eat. We both weigh less than you but when you get right down to it, the strategies, the food has to be similar unless you also have insulin resistance.

At 33, you still have time to have a child. If you could get your weight down within two years, you will only be 35 and that is still ok for making a baby. Obesity apparently does reduce fertility so for that reason, you need to lose weight. But you have many reasons to lose weight, as do we all.

When you start this thing, give yourself time to work it out and get into the rhythm of it. Don't expect or be impatient for dramatic fast results. Think of this as a long term project but one that needs a daily effort and commitment and monitoring.

You have a supportive husband. That's a lot more than i've got or ever had. Therefore you've got a great deal. So that's great. Use that advantage. Make some happiness for yourself. Sounds like you've earned it. Live for the day. Enjoy the small things. As you go on, things will gradually get better and fall into place.

I"ve had quite different struggles from you. I'm 47 now, no kids no husband, no money. I have my health and a great place to live and very little stress anymore. But what i'm saying is that i've learnt a few things along the way during my own struggles. You have a lot of good living yet to do and you have someone to do it with which is a great thing. If you can commit to weight loss you will be fine.

There is one more thing though. You say you are putting on weight fast. Have you ever been tested for diabetes, or pre-diabetes and insulin resistance. If you have this, you will have to follow a different sort of diet than what i would follow. When you find another doctor, get yourself tested for these things, if you haven't done it already.

With regard to exercise, if you are very overweight, you shouldn't try to do too much until you get your weight down. I mean much exercise that will put more strain on your joints and body which even includes too much walking. The cohen dieters don't do any exercise until they've finished their program. I think for them it sounds sensible. On the other hand, something like swimming or aqua aerobics is good for anyone who likes being in a pool.

 

[Emerald1]

There is a lot of support to be found here and you can even start a diary where you can express yourself freely whether it's about the food you're eating, the exercise you're up to doing, or letting off a little steam here and there. We'll be here to lend support and advice.
You are still here and that show's how strong you really are. You've gone through a lot of stress and you're still strong enough to seek help and willing to work hard to be in a better more healthy situation.
Welcome Maryanne.

 

[Maryanne]

Thank you everyone for your warm welcomes! I am going to take some more time tonight to read thru the forum and get a better idea of what path to take. I do think counting calories and having a diary will help in a big way.
Off to read and gain some more insight. Thank you!!!