giving up on my weightloss journey

A

angel light

New member
Hi guys
I'm new here and this is my first post so hi to everybody
I just really feel like I need some help and motivation right now.
Over the past year I've lost around 45 pounds and I'm now nearing the end of the road. I still want/need to lose about 15 pounds but I just feel like my motivation and dedication is going out the window, and it's becoming harder and harder to lose the weight.
I'm a really impatient person and I feel as though it's making me fall back into bad habits like binge eating.
I watch my caloric intake, but lately I just can't be bothered to exercise or care about what I'm eating- I hate my body!
I think I've always had poor body image because I've always been over weight.
I'm currently around 135 and I'm 5'5 so anything near 120 is healthy for me (bmi wise).
I'm also a pear shape but I have quite muscley legs from dancing/tennis when I was younger, with a layer of fat over them, so I am really self conscious about this
I basically am giving myself a deadline to lose this remaining weight by and I just feel like I need someone to tell me I can do it. So by Feb/March 2010 I hope to be around 120 pounds
Do you guys think this is doable? My frame of mind isn't the best right now.
I have a serious chocolate addiction and when I'm feeling stressed and unhappy I turn to it for comfort, or just eat everything else instead of it
I eat around 1200-1500 cals per day and try to exercise for an hr about 5 days a week (hasn't been happening lately)
I think this blog is really going to help me though, so I will record my weekly progress
Any encouragement or questions are welcome

Thanks for reading guys
 
Hey Angel,

Just want to start by saying congrats on the 45 lbs over that past year. That is an amazing accomplishment. You should be so proud of yourself. Not many people could do that.

There are so many topics i get from reading your post. First off, i think you are putting too much pressure on your to be that "ideal weight". Why do you HAVE to be there by 2010? Why cant you say "i want to continue my heathy lifestyle that I have learned over the past year and not fallen back to my old ways."

Beleive me we all get burnt out every so often. When was the last time you took a week off from the gym? What about eating at maintenance for a week instead of restricting calories? You cant be 100% focused 100% of the time.

As far as the chocolate addiction goes, who doesnt love some chocolate. There is nothing wrong with some good dark chocolate. Can you control your portion? I was in a Lindt store the other day and walked out with a piece of dark chocolate that was amazing and left me satisfied.

Like I said, you have accomplished amazing things and PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE dont let it slip away. Remember this is a lifestyle that you will have for many, many years and not something that expires or goes away.

Stick around, let us know how things are going. We're around if you need us!

Matt
 
Hey Matt, thanks heaps for ur response.

I know my head is really all over the place at the moment lol.. hence the million topics in one post!

I know I pressure myself but I'm really just SICK of feeling gross about my body. Plus I am starting university next year and I'd really like to feel comfortable with myself by then..... I feel quite uncomfortable in public at the moment.

I recently went on a trip back to my home town for about a month, (I gained about 2kg) where I had a lot of bad memories (mixed with good of course), and I really gave up during that time. (Eating bad food, not really exercising, drinking and partying a lot). Now I'm back home and it seems SO extra hard. I feel like I can't get back on track. I just keep saying 'yeah tomorrow I'l re-start.'

I also just found out I'm lactose intolerant and so I made a personal decision to turn vegan (not just because of the LI, but for many different reasons). I hate chocolate because I feel like it was the main reason I was fat in the first place, but it really does make me feel happy lol

But anyway don't you think 15 pounds is a reasonable goal for about 5 months? It seems sensible to me. I just need to get back on track somehow
 
Yes, 15 lbs is very reasonable in 5 months. It is always great to have goals. Personally, if you are having trouble getting back on track dont center your goals around weight loss.

Make your goals to get to the gym or workout for the next week. Write a schedule and stick to it. Challenge yourself to be spot on with your calories for the next week. Short term goals that can get you focused. THEN once you are back in the swing of it you can focus on weightloss.

I truly understand about the chocolate. My addiction was chinese food. I ate large amounts and very often. I went cold turkey two years ago and have not looked back. Sure i still crave it and want it but realize that my goals are a lot better that food.

Is this journey easy? Abso-F'in-lutely not. Is it worth it? You betcha!!!

Start a diary and keep in touch!
 
With your diet under control, its possibly to healthily lose 1% of your body weight per week. If you're 135 right now, you could potentially be down to 120 in 12-13 weeks, or 3 months. So I'd say 5 months is no problem.

As for giving up, what will that acomplish? Certainly you must feel better and look better now than you did before you lost 45 lbs, right? Being frustrated because its hard to lose the last 15lbs is no reason to give up and turn to past bad habits and gain all that weight back. Just as a warning, its entirely possible to gain even more weight than where you were before you started.

A question: what do you plan on doing when you reach your goal? Are you gonna say "I'm done" and go off a diet and stop working out? If you do that, I guarentee you'll regain the weight and lose all your hard work. When you are at your goal weight, you're still going to benefit from exercise, and you will still need to monitor calories and be on a healthy balanced diet for the rest of your life, and its still going to be hard work (but not impossible). Where will you find the motivation for just maintaining your weight, when you don't have a scale to watch getting lower?

So my advice is to focus on continuing to be healthily, stop worrying about the scale, and let the weight come off when it will. Giving up is not going to solve anything.
 
My question really is HOW to lose that body fat.. because I feel like the weightloss stopped.. which made me feel depressed.. which made me want to eat more....it's a really bad cycle I guess. How should I go about losing the last 15 pounds? I know it's probably going to be the hardest part so far.

I know that I'm going to have to do this for the rest of my life. I genuinely love healthy food ( I'm studying nutrition next year). I think the problem is I eat too much and then I'm craving something sweet and it all goes downhill. At one point I did hit just under 60kgs (Im aussie so I usually speak in kilos lol) and it really motivated me to stay on track. But then I went on a holiday and gained a couple of kg's and I felt so useless. I feel so obsessed by food, my weight, the scales and honestly bloody terrified to gain weight, and I think it screws with my head a bit.

How can one stop obsessing? I feel like weightloss is my life right now
 
Have you read the sticky threads at the top of each section? I would start there. There are a lot of great articles by very knowledgable people.

Education and learning are very important to this. Read and read some more. The more info you have the better your plan. The better your plan the better chance for success.

It's is all a mind game. It still plays with my head but it will get better. When I started this I said the same things, I obsessed and I always thought it was like a part time job. It's all about balance and finding a happy medium.

Damn metric system. I hate kilos, it drives me up a wall. The world will be such a happier place when everyone speaks in lbs. (just kidding of course)
 
It really is a mind game isn't it.. it's just so constant and honestly plain tiring!

I really have to try to believe in myself more I guess, I just feel quite gross all the time.

Maybe I need some therapy lol :blush5:
 
thanks heaps matt
i already feel better and more positive!

day 1 tomorrow.. focus on eating well and i'll see what my scale says in the morn so i can keep a record

shall keep things updated for myself and anyone else out there who needs motivation

ps. my real name is kt :coolgleamA:
 
You say that you believe that you may have always had a poor body image - so it is possible that you have a distorted view of your current body situation.

I have just calculated and your BMI is 22.5 which is healthy. Not everyone is cut out to have a BMI of 20.0 which is what you are aiming for.

It is possible that your body is telling you that you have already reached a comfortable healthy level.
 
I know that I am in the healthy weight range but I find the bmi a bit strange because I still have fairly high body fat percentage (I think over 25%) and according to BMI I can be healthy from say 53kg to 68kg which doesnt seem right.. at 68kg I definately still didn't look healthy. I did look healthier than previously, but not healthy.. maybe I will get the courage to post some pics soon :blush5:
 
Hey KT. I think you've gotten some really good advice so far from some of the smartest people on the boards. I agree with everything they've said.

I'll tell you my own experience: Nearly 2 years ago now, I lost 80 lbs. When I got to the mid 160s, I kind of "gave up" - not out of bad body image or anything, but because I was dealing with so much in my life that the idea of more weight loss just seemed overwhelming. I kind of hit maybe something similar to what you're going through. I didn't want to give up the progress I'd made, but I just wanted to quit having to think so much about every thing. :) I was also, if I have to be honest, a little freaked out about being a "normal" size for the first time in nearly 20 years. I still was having a hard time figuring that out.

I actually took a year off to just BE. I didn't go back to my old bad habits and I didn't quit exercising entirely - but I took the focus off of losing weight. I maintained in the mid 170s for nearly a year before I felt that I was ready to go back to losing weight. It's been tough to get back into it, I won't lie. I am comfortable maintaining and cutting back food and adding more exercise has been a bit of a struggle, but I'm slowly and surely losing again. I'm back down to 168 and I'm hoping to keep going and hit my goal of 130 before the end of the year. :)

So I guess all of that to say ... I understand where you are and please don't give up. You've come too far to throw it all away! But you CAN take a break if you need to. Give yourself some time. It doesn't have to be a year like I did ... but even just giving yourself a month to get your head together is OK.

Hang in there and know that there are a lot of people here who will support you. :)
 
So maybe you should throw the scale out the window and focus on body composition. Are you doing any weight training?

I have heard New Rules of Lifting for Women is a good book to start with. And dont worry about getting "bulking". It's very hard for a woman to get that look.

I'm at the point where I am working on body comp. Sure I saw a number on the scale that made me happy but i lost a lot of muscle and had that skinny fat look. I am actually trying to gain muscle at this point and a little weight gain is coming with that bulk. You want to talk about head games? Try telling a former fat person to gain weight. THAT screws with your mind. I am ok with a little weight gain and I can see progress so i am ok with the scale going up.
 
I mentioned NROL for women and here is Kara. PErfect timing kara. ;)

I know from previous posts Kara really likes this book and she is the one to talk to about it.

Matt
 
I have heard New Rules of Lifting for Women is a good book to start with.
Click to expand...
Awesome book - even just the original version - New Rules of Lifting is great. I'd recommend either of them. The "for Women" version touches on a lot of myths and helps with understanding, but the programs are great in both.

Hahaha. Jinx!!
 
You have to remember that you do have muscly legs which will effect the BMI. I know how difficult it is to take a step back from preconcieved ideas of weight magic numbers when your body image becomes distorted one way or another.

If you are a member of a gym it could be worth checking there - and seeing what they have to say about your ideal shape / weightloss goals.

If you are not a member of a gym - maybe you could pretend to be thinking of joining one and seeing if you can get some sort of fitness assessment as part of their sales pitch.

You say that you are about to study nutrition - maybe there is someone that could help you there or in the sports department of that college.

If all else fails maybe your doctor would be able to provide an opinion.

Far too many people acquire a distorted view of themselves. It would be a good idea to have help in determining your goal weight.
 
Hey guys thanks for the book suggestion- I will definately try to check it out!

Kara thanks for your post, I really can relate to your experience! It really does get overwhelming at times.. it's like weightloss is consuming my every thought. It drives me crazy! Can I ask, how did you obsess less?

I am a member of a gym and I do weight training for about 45 mins, twice a week. Despite what a lot of people think, I actually have the genetics to gain muscle. It's rare in women but I do have it and can look bulky at times because of my build. I think the main problem at the moment is keeping my eating under control. I actually have a personal trainer at the moment, but I really don't like listening to him. I guess I just hate being told what to do lol and I'm really stubborn. But the things he suggests, I'm already doing anyway so it feels a bit pointless to me. I've had a few people do my measurements and most have reccommended being around 56-58kg or so, but I still feel I'd maybe have too much body fat

In the end I really just want to look good in a bikini and not feel self-conscience.. that is seriously my dream lol
 
I would aim no lower than 56kg and be asking the personal trainer what he suggests for the areas where you percieve that there is a problem.

I think that you will look better in that bikini at the weight that they suggest with the right toning than by simply dropping pounds from where-ever that would give you a weight that calculates to a BMI of 20.
 
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