after weight loss

T

tyrann180

New member
i am a 19 year old male. i have already reached my weight loss goal which i started around 230 and now i weight 160. i lost alot of weight but my goals were more performance to be faster stronger etc... for sports. most my life i was perfect on the bmi but early teens i got heavy and now im back to a normal bmi. when i was heavy i was very out going and social and i was kinda a clown, being heavy i was very insecure and it really bothered me and frustrated me. now that i lost my weight my social behaviors have changed. i try to be my self and i want to be social sometimes but i feel out of place. can weight loss affect your brain this way? i lost weight to get back to myself and i feel like opposite has happened. im 19 i mean it could be other changes not the weight loss. but i used to be able to talk and engage many people but now i have trouble connecting to people.
 
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tyrann180 said:
i am a 19 year old male. i have already reached my weight loss goal which i started around 230 and now i weight 160. i lost alot of weight but my goals were more performance to be faster stronger etc... for sports. most my life i was perfect on the bmi but early teens i got heavy and now im back to a normal bmi. when i was heavy i was very out going and social and i was kinda a clown, being heavy i was very insecure and it really bothered me and frustrated me. now that i lost my weight my social behaviors have changed. i try to be my self and i want to be social sometimes but i feel out of place. can weight loss affect your brain this way? i lost weight to get back to myself and i feel like opposite has happened. im 19 i mean it could be other changes not the weight loss. but i used to be able to talk and engage many people but now i have trouble connecting to people.
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odd... i think im experiencing the same thing with the whole social thing. i wonder if theres something to it?

I rmember reading something about going through drastic weight loss changes, that you almost need to adobt a superiority complex to help with the mental part of it. I wonder if thats the case?
 
There's this new show called I Want to Save Your Life and one of the guys mentioned that in an episode. He was this heavy guy with a great sense of humor and was afraid that that side of him would go away with the weight.

Just try to think of it like, your body is doing all the changing. Just because you look different now doesn't mean your personality has to change. There's no reason for you to feel awkward in any social situation.
 
I think that we, as fat people, can sometimes compensate for our weight. Almost like, we dont think people will like us because we are fat so therefore we need to give them a reason to like us so we act outgoing. (this does not mean every fat person acts like this)

Then when we lose our weight, we dont need to compensate for our size so we dont need to act outgoing.

This adjustment from fat to skinnier and can have a transition period and that is where the whole how am i perceived by other and myself comes into play.
 
Here's my opinion.

I totally agree with usedtobefatmatt.

I think that being large you already think you know how people are going to judge you so you definitely make up for it by being really social, outgoing and humorous.
So you compensate for being overweight by being very friendly and outgoing.
(Obviously this isn't the case for everyone.)

Once you lose the weight, you don't know how or if everyone will accept you. I think you're not AS outgoing because you don't have anything to compensate for. You just have to be you. I believe often times people fear not being accepted for who they are so it kinda puts a wall around how you react to people. It basically feels like you have to start all over again and find where you fit in.

Also, being overweight, you already know how to deal with rejection. After losing the weight you don't have anything to hide YOU. I think once you know how rejection feels when you're over weight, once you lose the weight you don't know exactly how to handle it at first.

You just really have to be yourself and be prepared for anything. I know you can push past this and be who you are meant to be. Know that you're a great person and carry yourself with self dignity and you'll just naturally draw people to you.
Don't shut people out and know that sometimes it takes time to mentally catch up to where you are physically.

It's a whole process and it doesn't change over night.

Good Luck with everything and congrats on the weight loss!
 
wow

this helps alot, i really think that being heavy i did have to compensate to be accepted. im trying to figure out where i fit in, and its is a whole new challenge different than loosing the weight. my role pretty much most my recent years was like bobby hill from king of the hill show if you have seen it, to be the chubby kid that can be funny. i am at my goal weight and i look unrecognizable to even family member that i haven't visited in a year or two. ive never been described as shy but lately alot of people describe me as that. could not eating enough and having that deficit make you less energetic?
 
I'm the same way. I was always the chubby girl since i was 3. At 18 i weighed 225 at 5'8 and over 2-3 years i went down to 165. I always had a great sense of humor and joked around and always got a laugh, i'm still the same way now but i find i am so much less social. When i was heavier i would always compare myself to others, thinking if i could just lose the weight i'd be fine. but unfortunately i compare myself even more now, and as a result my social life has suffered. I rarely go out, and usually only hang out with my boyfriend or my sister. I don't know why this happens but I hope you as well as any others find a way to deal with it and can be happy. all the best!
 
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