Hi all 
It has been 6 years give or take, since I was here last. I weighed around 135kgs. Alot has happend since... not all good, not all bad.
I met a guy 2009, fell in love yada yada, things didnt go too well during the 4 years we were together, drugs, alcohol, lots of munching, and weight rose up to 155kg. Year ago we broke up. First I was heartbroken, but then my eyes opened and I couldnt believe what an idiot I had been. When people say "Love is blind" ... It really is. I didnt have any friends during my 4 years with him, because he didnt let me have them. I was holed up in our apartment pretty much everyday. I played video games, ate, drank, smoked weed, and just ravaged my fridge. I was depressed, and abused. I started getting panick attacks when I had to go out alone, and life just really was crap.
now this past year, well technically last year. I have been single for a whole year now, and I couldnt be happier. in 6months during january 2013 - june 2013 I somehow, I even dont know how. went from 155kg to 139kg. I dropped weed, and didnt munch as much during that time, I went out to the night clubs to shake my booty with my best friend who I had lost contact for 5 years. We rekindled, and she, and her fiance have been suchs a big support for me. I would not be here without her, literally(first part of 2013 was very dark for me). I drank quite heavily, every weekend, sometimes during week with my gaming friends. But I still lost the weight.
I dropped drinking so heavily during summer, and did it once a week, and not as much. I got to 133kg by september, from there I got depressed again, and my weight just rose back up to 142kg.
Now, I took myself from the neck and made the decision again to work hard with losing weight. It has been 3 days and today I weighed 139.7kg wich made me happy.
I hate excercising, specially walking outside, I feel like everyone is staring at me, and im uncomfy.
I started doing abs and squats at home, and since I LOVE dancing(I cant dance, I just look like an idiot but I just love it) I have started to randomly dance around my house, making my kitties run in terror to a safe place to stare at the crazy cat lady Now my tigh(spelling?) muscles hurt, but it feels good aswell.
I dont currently work, so I have free time, which is my enemy, I get bored, and boredom leads to eating. I have managed it now somehow, since I eat small meals 4 times a day, heavier in the morning ( egg, sandwich, ALMOST whatever I feel like), and during the day I just take snacks, like a fruit, tuna, or suchs. My evening eating is my mortal enemy, and my weakest point. Need to get that in control. I try to check out my calories, and stay around 1400 a day.
I dont have many people I can talk to about my weight problems, and I tend to lose motivation to do it, thinking "Ill do it tomorrow", and I feel like a failure when I eat something im not supposed to and give up. I hate it. and this time im trying to push myself.
Time to go jiggle and wiggle to good music
It has been 6 years give or take, since I was here last. I weighed around 135kgs. Alot has happend since... not all good, not all bad.
I met a guy 2009, fell in love yada yada, things didnt go too well during the 4 years we were together, drugs, alcohol, lots of munching, and weight rose up to 155kg. Year ago we broke up. First I was heartbroken, but then my eyes opened and I couldnt believe what an idiot I had been. When people say "Love is blind" ... It really is. I didnt have any friends during my 4 years with him, because he didnt let me have them. I was holed up in our apartment pretty much everyday. I played video games, ate, drank, smoked weed, and just ravaged my fridge. I was depressed, and abused. I started getting panick attacks when I had to go out alone, and life just really was crap.
now this past year, well technically last year. I have been single for a whole year now, and I couldnt be happier. in 6months during january 2013 - june 2013 I somehow, I even dont know how. went from 155kg to 139kg. I dropped weed, and didnt munch as much during that time, I went out to the night clubs to shake my booty with my best friend who I had lost contact for 5 years. We rekindled, and she, and her fiance have been suchs a big support for me. I would not be here without her, literally(first part of 2013 was very dark for me). I drank quite heavily, every weekend, sometimes during week with my gaming friends. But I still lost the weight.
I dropped drinking so heavily during summer, and did it once a week, and not as much. I got to 133kg by september, from there I got depressed again, and my weight just rose back up to 142kg.
Now, I took myself from the neck and made the decision again to work hard with losing weight. It has been 3 days and today I weighed 139.7kg wich made me happy.
I hate excercising, specially walking outside, I feel like everyone is staring at me, and im uncomfy.
I started doing abs and squats at home, and since I LOVE dancing(I cant dance, I just look like an idiot but I just love it) I have started to randomly dance around my house, making my kitties run in terror to a safe place to stare at the crazy cat lady
Now my tigh(spelling?) muscles hurt, but it feels good aswell.I dont currently work, so I have free time, which is my enemy, I get bored, and boredom leads to eating. I have managed it now somehow, since I eat small meals 4 times a day, heavier in the morning ( egg, sandwich, ALMOST whatever I feel like), and during the day I just take snacks, like a fruit, tuna, or suchs. My evening eating is my mortal enemy, and my weakest point. Need to get that in control. I try to check out my calories, and stay around 1400 a day.
I dont have many people I can talk to about my weight problems, and I tend to lose motivation to do it, thinking "Ill do it tomorrow", and I feel like a failure when I eat something im not supposed to and give up. I hate it. and this time im trying to push myself.
Time to go jiggle and wiggle to good music
