23 yr old mom of 2!

GlitteredBliss

GlitteredBliss

New member
Im technically not a NEW mom, I just had my second daughter November of 2005, shes 6 months old and my first daughter is 4 years old. I got pregnant at 18 and I was 130, alil overweight I think but I was happy with myself, Im 5'1" I think Im supposed to be like more like 115-125, but I dunno for sure. But with my first daughter I gainned like 65 lbs! I did lose some of it, to about 175-180, but I was still fat, and I slowly got up to like almost 190 anyways. I then started losing on weight watchers in January 2005, I lost 25lbs only to find out I was pregnant in April. So I gainned like 35 lbs and Im down to 192 again, but I am so fat. I have a hole in my heart with makes my heart rate elevated pretty constantly, so I know all this weight has got to be putting alot of stress on my heart. I can barely make it up to my second floor apt without having a heart attack lol. My knees are hurting lately I know Im too little of a person to have so much weight on me. My feet are flat which has always caused me some discomfort in my ankles and lower legs, but lately its crazy how much it hurts. I want my children to have a active parent, one who plays with them physically and teaches them good eating habits, I would hate for my daughters to grow up, only to realize they dunno how to eat correctly. I dont want to be a model, I dont want to weight 100 lbs, I DO want to weigh under 135lb, I do want to be a 9 again... Im in a 16-18 and I am only 23 I want to dress like a 23 year old, not proctively but young... and I cant because Im forced to wear moomoos or oversized clothing to mask my fat. I hate it. I want to change, I feel like Im wasting my youth, on food. Im throwing away my 20s on being fat... I wanna look back at my 20s as a time when I was beautiful, (not that Ill only be beautiful if Im young) But I want it to be a carefree era, and though I have children I want to be care free about my weight, I dont want to struggle with it my entire life. I wanna be a better, more active mom.
 
Hi & Welcome!!! I feel the same as you. Sooooooo ready to change!
 
Hi GlitteredBliss. I felt the same as you. I was 18 when I got pregnant with my daughter and I gained over 40 pounds. I hated it. Then with my son (a year and a half) I gained 35 mostly cause I was cut back because of gestational diabetes. You might want to start with your doctor to figure out a healthy calorie intake as well as an exercise program. If I were you I would start out small. Take baby steps, it's easier in the long run. Maybe start by eating a fruit or veg with every meal and start taking certain things out all together. I would also start a journal here, they are a great way for you to keep track of yourself and to get feedback. No one is judgemental! Welcome to the forum, sorry to rant on but I know where you are coming from. I hope the lil advice helps.
 
Thanx to both of you, it feels good that other people DO feel the same, that girls have normal lives, like me that everytime I look around I have to see a skinnier girl, and how perfect and flawless she must feel... I didnt used to notice as much, but I notice a pretty girl around ALL the time now that Im married... Its like Im watching to see if my husband looks, and if he was to perhaps simply look in her direction, I start a huge argument... I feel bad for doing it, but Im so scared that it would cause him to want more than me. I KNOW that he loves me, but I want him to LUST me too, I know thats asking alot weve been together for 3 years and married for 1, so the "newness" of our relationship is wearing off... I dunno if I had better self esteem, then I wouldnt care if he looks cuz if other guys looked at me he would feel like I do, that other people find me attractive and he likes that. Truly I dont think that he thinks like this, but I do. I used to say that I was a happy fat girl, and Im not "unhappy" I just know I could be so much happier. I know
Im a great person, a fun person, a smart person... but people judge books by their cover... and Im sick of my brown paper bag book cover lol
About the Doctor thing... I cant see my doctor my husband insurance costs too much money for us and we dont have health insurance, only my children do. I would much rather do this with the help of a doctor, but thats just not possible right now.
 
Stinks about the insurance, it can be tricky sometimes!:eek: Sometimes I wish that your health was covered the way it is while you are prego and getting big and then on your way back down as well. :p I know what you mean about feeling the insecurities, I will never have a flat tummy again. My stretch marks go half way up to my boobs, no lie. It is very embarassing.
I would just start slow, and make your changes slowly, they say it takes a month to make or change a habit. Maybe challenge yourself to stick to something that long and see if it works. You do wanna stay around for your kids! Try going to Fitday.com, it is a free site that you can track your calories versus your exercise to see how you are doing. Good luck.:)
 
Money Money Money

:p I know its like the doctors were so concerned with my long term health, till after I had the baby its like no pay no play. I understand and respect what doctors do, its amazing what they can help with, but honestly isnt there a way that everyone deserves to have good health regardless of their pocketbook size, I know that money doesnt buy everything, and only God will control my fate, but come on cant the poor even be on the cutting edge of what can possibly be controlled by the medical field. Its like heres the cure... but its gonna cost you. I already have $3,000 racked up in hospital/doctor bills, it cost me $500 just to step into an emergency room... what is that? I have to choose between my health or debt... and the creditors... my gosh how extremely rude, discusting how they treat and speak to people. All over money. If I could see a doctor about my weight, I would... and I would follow orders, and a Nutritionist, and a trainer... all I need is the know how, and the motivation... but EVERYTHING cost money. I cant even eat health without breaking the bank... good food is expensive.
PS dont feel bad about stretch marks, mINE are almost to my chest as well. My husband mistakenly joked it looked like "a crater" what a kick in the teeth. I assumed since I had blown up so quick with my first daughter, and gotten such bad stretch marks, my second wouldnt leave any. Boy was I wrong, my first daughter stretched me sideways, while my second stretched me forward (everyone SWORE she was a boy). My husband wonders why I dont wanna try once more for a boy, what the heck?! I cant recover from the first two, I will NEVER be the same. I am a young girl. Woman. And I have killed my youth! I love my children they ARE the light of my life, I would do it all again if I could, only this time Id eat right, and use LOTS of cocoa butter! I just feel like you DONT have to sacrifice yourself to bear children.
 
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GlitteredBliss...I know how you feel

GlitteredBliss said:
Im technically not a NEW mom, I just had my second daughter November of 2005, shes 6 months old and my first daughter is 4 years old. I got pregnant at 18 and I was 130, alil overweight I think but I was happy with myself, Im 5'1" I think Im supposed to be like more like 115-125, but I dunno for sure. But with my first daughter I gainned like 65 lbs! I did lose some of it, to about 175-180, but I was still fat, and I slowly got up to like almost 190 anyways. I then started losing on weight watchers in January 2005, I lost 25lbs only to find out I was pregnant in April. So I gainned like 35 lbs and Im down to 192 again, but I am so fat. I have a hole in my heart with makes my heart rate elevated pretty constantly, so I know all this weight has got to be putting alot of stress on my heart. I can barely make it up to my second floor apt without having a heart attack lol. My knees are hurting lately I know Im too little of a person to have so much weight on me. My feet are flat which has always caused me some discomfort in my ankles and lower legs, but lately its crazy how much it hurts. I want my children to have a active parent, one who plays with them physically and teaches them good eating habits, I would hate for my daughters to grow up, only to realize they dunno how to eat correctly. I dont want to be a model, I dont want to weight 100 lbs, I DO want to weigh under 135lb, I do want to be a 9 again... Im in a 16-18 and I am only 23 I want to dress like a 23 year old, not proctively but young... and I cant because Im forced to wear moomoos or oversized clothing to mask my fat. I hate it. I want to change, I feel like Im wasting my youth, on food. Im throwing away my 20s on being fat... I wanna look back at my 20s as a time when I was beautiful, (not that Ill only be beautiful if Im young) But I want it to be a carefree era, and though I have children I want to be care free about my weight, I dont want to struggle with it my entire life. I wanna be a better, more active mom.
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I was *Exactly* where you are mentally right now. It feels hopeless, dosen't it? Well, it's not hopeless and YOU are certainly NOT hopeless. I have 2 little ones of my own and I was overweight after they were born (5 years apart.) Keep getting outside and be as active as you can be. Go for a short walk and slowly keep taking longer walks over time. Also, you could try Richard Simmons "Sweating to the Oldies" His exercise regimine is very easy on the joints and you may really like it. Start out slow and with Your DOCTOR's permission. The key is finding something you like and then you won't have a problem sticking to it. The more active you are the better you'll feel. I started doing Tae Bo on Feb 20th and the first day I put the DVD in I got through the warm up and then Off went the DVD player for the day. It's something that you have to work up to, don't expect it to happen over night, but if you can keep up with it, you will start to see a change in youself. I know you can do it sweetie! ;)
 
You know my sister has a tae-bo tape video that I tried a lobg time ago, just for that once, and I thought it was sorta fun. PLus I seen a show that takes different exercise equipment and "judges or rates" them. tae-bo, Billy Blanks bootcamp, was highly recommended since it was easy to learn, yet was an intense workout, people felt sore after doing it...which means results! But it did take the people awhile to get thru the entire dvd, and they werent even in the worst shape, so I guess that would mean, I could work up to doing it, besides if its too easy, I guess its not much help... no pain no gain right?!
 
Hey, I'm new here, but wanted to say we already have a lot in common.

I'm 22 and have two kids. I got pregnant with my little girl when I was 18 also and just had my son in Dec. 2005. My daughter will be four next month.:D I also wear size 18s.

I am 5'4" though. I was 155 when I got pregnant the first time, 180 the second time, and now I'm bouncing between 204 and 198.:(

Anyway, I look forward to getting to know you better.:)
 
:cool: Wow its great to hear from you, I havent found much here yet in the... Young adult... with kids... theres the mom thing and there are lots of people who are really supportive, no matter your age. But its great to hear from someone that IS pretty similar to myself:cool:
 
Hello all. I fit right in here also. I am 27. I have 3 kids ages 10, 6, and just turned 2. I started out weighing 105 ..... I am at about 210 now.:eek: I am 5'6 and a size 16 - 18. :( Really I just still buy maternity clothes. It is the only things that fit me right up top and in the legs, but is large enough for my mid-section and backside. I don't even know where to start with the whole dieting thing. I got back down to 145 lbs after my second child by doing nothing. I was touring in a band and the weight just came off its self. Now I have a little one and Don't really have much of an option to work because of the kids schedules.(on and off the school bus, baseball..etc.) I think a lot of my problem is being stuck at home in a routine I can't stand. I hate being bored and just don't want to do anything anymore unless it involves going out on Friday night to the bar. I anyone can give me some advice on where to even start I would appreciate it.:confused:
 
Hey Believe me I understand. Its like I thought it was bad before, but its even worse with a smaller child, and with more than one child. Its like being pulled into two different directions well, three really my husband is as bad as a kid. I feel so, fat and depressed what would I even have energy to do. Everything I want takes so much effort, and it feels like effort is what I lack. I am in a routine that I hate, and my husband makes it worse by belittling the fact that Im a stay at home mother. Like if I dont put the dishes away everyday that Im good for nothing, that because he wants to buy more for himself and cant that its my fault cuz Im dont have a job. But the sitter I have found can only sit in the day and I cant get a sister in the evenings. So what can I do? Ive applied everywhere, and cuz Im not available in the evenings, Im not called back. Ive been looking for about 2-3 months and nothing. I really eating an apple instead of a chocolate bar after fighting with him about how I am a valuble asset to our family. I feel like crying and instead I eat. I know I eat out of boredom, but I also eatr when In upset... so if I dont fix my issues, how can I even stop eating... ?
 
You sound just like me! My husband does the same thing. He tries to support me, but just always ends up saying the wrong things. And He complained that I couldn't work, now I bartend 3 days a week and he complains cause he has to cook and take care of the kids after he has worked all day! :confused: I can't win! I don't have the problem with eating all the time. I am a smoker. When I get bored or upset I smoke. I am going to quit when my husband turns 30 in oct. He chews. So we are going to quit together. We figured we would save $50 a week by quitting. Isn't that sick. You should look into bartending or waitressing. Most places have flexible hours and shifts, and good tips. Even if you only work on your husbands days off or when you can get a sitter. It is better than nothing, and I like it cause I don't have to take anyones crap! But it is funny how you say eveything you do takes so much effort. I feel exactly like that. I find myself contradicting myself all the time. I am bored but don't feel like doing anything. Or I am hungry but nothing looks good. It's almost like I can't even please myself! And stupid things like just walking outside to check the mail seems like such a hassle. I know its not, but I just don't want to do ANYTHING! But I don't want to do nothing! I sometimes think I am going nuts! :(
 
When I see a new mom and we talk about losing the baby fat, I often get a look when I tell her my daughter is 4!! heheh... since i had Kaylyn in 2001, I haven't been as dedicated to working out and eating as healthy as I should, but I'm about to turn that all around. Does anyone have any suggestions?
 
I feel ya

I'm a 23 yo mom to three. I have a 7 yo step daughter, who is just like my own and lives with us, and a 3 and 1 yo who are mine biologically. I gained 60 lbs with my first pregnancy due to emotional eating after my boyfriend left us. I have stretch mark EVERYWHERE! I lost about 40, then got pg with my 1 yo! I only gained 30 with him, but it's been a battle to get back down to my prekids weight - 113. I'm actually shooting for 110 just because it would make me feel sooooo good about myself.

I wish you luck on your journey! You can do it!!
 
22 year old mom of a 2 yo and a new baby!

Hi all! I'm new here, and I have a two yo daughter, and a new baby boy that just turned 6 weeks old. I was 118 lbs. before either pregnancy and gained 35 pounds with my daughter. After her birth, I was breastfeeding, so the weight came off pretty quickly, but I guess the rest was just fat, because I was 10 lbs. heavier (128) when I got pregnant with my son. I only gained 28 pounds with him though (kinda funny cause I actually looked bigger with him!) lol. Anyways, it's only been 6 weeks since he was born and I have lost 21 pounds and am down to 135 now, but my ideal weight for my height and bone structure is around 115 lbs. Any ideas or tips that might help me achieve my goal! I am all too eager to get back into all of my prepregnancy wardrobe!
 
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