perfect_thrill
New member
My Life in Short Form
The last 19 years have been quite an adventure. Life hasn't been "normal". I don't say this like the typical child/teen who's parents split up and holding a grudge, because my parents are as much in love as they have been for the past 20 years and has made my difficult life.
I haven't really been all that lucky. I've had to handle a lot really fast, really young. My best friend/love of my life died in front of me when I was 14 years old. He dropped dead. 5 years has past and I'm still not over it, I shouldn't have to be. I don't look for sympathy...I just deal with it. But I refuse to let it go or forget about it. He lives on inside of me everyday. My mom had cancer when I was younger...my dad has to raise his family because his mother died when he was 15. He took off on tour across North American, as a banjo player in his teen years and upon returning home he met and fell in love with my mother. We're well off, I suppose. We have what we want, we don't take it for granted and we work hard to get where we are. I've never really had to ask for anything and I'm blessed for it...but I do feel a lot of compassion for people who aren't doing well in life.
So my papa died when I was 7... things got bitter for me...it was my first loss and those 7 years were full of my papa. I would be at their house more then my own because I loved hanging out with him. He was the shits banana. Anyway. Slowly started to lose great aunts and uncles but nobody that was incredibly close. Then Aaron happened. I had known him since I was 3 or 4.... our families were close, especially in the summer. Swimming found him getting out of the pool, saying he was going to be sick and then basically dropping dead of a heart attack. 16 years old. That boy didn't get to live. It kills me to go on and not know who he would be today. He would have been so accomplished. He had dreams. All taken away by a heart defect. Needless to say
day isn't much of anything to me and probably never will be, as it was the day he died.
Haven't lost anyone that close lately. I pray that it stays that way.
So food basically became my emotional response to everything. I wasn't a pig but I did over eat... and it saw me getting bigger then all the other girls noticeably faster but it wasn't "over the top". I've never let it get over the top. But to me...I felt over the top and I needed to change.
I used to diet in high school but I never got anywhere...I know what I did wrong, I've fixed it and I'm finally driven to get where I'm going.
I live in Napanee, Ontario. I have forever. High School saw me becoming who I wanted to be for the most part. We all did stupid things especially when we're in grade 9 and 10 but by the end of High School, I was the first student to have a full profile done on them in the local newspaper and had made my own CD, which I performed and produced on my own.
Music has been my life basically since I was 2. I've been singing since I've known words and became quite accomplished really early. I learned guitar at the age of 8 and about 7 instruments after that. I want to work in music for a living....producing bands and mixing, mastering.... that's a passion. I love performing live but I don't feel that being a musician will be as fulfilling as working hands on with music. I want to do it all. Which brings me to London Ontario this fall. Where I will begin a three year program focusing on all aspects of the music industry.
I've been through so much more but it's all too personal to really go on and on about. I hope you kinda get the idea about who I really am. I am genuine. I'm honest and open, totally dependable and crazy trustworthy.
I'm an adult now, at least that's what it seems like. I miss being young, I'm scared of getting older but I do want to be who I am meant to be. I was given some reason to be here and I'm going to use it.
When it comes to losing this weight, I'm not doing it for anyone or anything. I'm doing it for MYSELF. I need to get out of this fat suit I've been in all my life. I deserve to be thin for once and I'm determined to get there and maintain it forever. Kids are definitely not in the near future for me. I have way to much to do and see before I could think of settling down.
So thanks for taking the walk with me and learning a few things. For all who has been supporting me so far, I thank you. I enjoy your faith and I promise not to let anyone down. Not even myself. You'll see
The last 19 years have been quite an adventure. Life hasn't been "normal". I don't say this like the typical child/teen who's parents split up and holding a grudge, because my parents are as much in love as they have been for the past 20 years and has made my difficult life.
I haven't really been all that lucky. I've had to handle a lot really fast, really young. My best friend/love of my life died in front of me when I was 14 years old. He dropped dead. 5 years has past and I'm still not over it, I shouldn't have to be. I don't look for sympathy...I just deal with it. But I refuse to let it go or forget about it. He lives on inside of me everyday. My mom had cancer when I was younger...my dad has to raise his family because his mother died when he was 15. He took off on tour across North American, as a banjo player in his teen years and upon returning home he met and fell in love with my mother. We're well off, I suppose. We have what we want, we don't take it for granted and we work hard to get where we are. I've never really had to ask for anything and I'm blessed for it...but I do feel a lot of compassion for people who aren't doing well in life.
So my papa died when I was 7... things got bitter for me...it was my first loss and those 7 years were full of my papa. I would be at their house more then my own because I loved hanging out with him. He was the shits banana. Anyway. Slowly started to lose great aunts and uncles but nobody that was incredibly close. Then Aaron happened. I had known him since I was 3 or 4.... our families were close, especially in the summer. Swimming found him getting out of the pool, saying he was going to be sick and then basically dropping dead of a heart attack. 16 years old. That boy didn't get to live. It kills me to go on and not know who he would be today. He would have been so accomplished. He had dreams. All taken away by a heart defect. Needless to say
day isn't much of anything to me and probably never will be, as it was the day he died. Haven't lost anyone that close lately. I pray that it stays that way.
So food basically became my emotional response to everything. I wasn't a pig but I did over eat... and it saw me getting bigger then all the other girls noticeably faster but it wasn't "over the top". I've never let it get over the top. But to me...I felt over the top and I needed to change.
I used to diet in high school but I never got anywhere...I know what I did wrong, I've fixed it and I'm finally driven to get where I'm going.
I live in Napanee, Ontario. I have forever. High School saw me becoming who I wanted to be for the most part. We all did stupid things especially when we're in grade 9 and 10 but by the end of High School, I was the first student to have a full profile done on them in the local newspaper and had made my own CD, which I performed and produced on my own.
Music has been my life basically since I was 2. I've been singing since I've known words and became quite accomplished really early. I learned guitar at the age of 8 and about 7 instruments after that. I want to work in music for a living....producing bands and mixing, mastering.... that's a passion. I love performing live but I don't feel that being a musician will be as fulfilling as working hands on with music. I want to do it all. Which brings me to London Ontario this fall. Where I will begin a three year program focusing on all aspects of the music industry.
I've been through so much more but it's all too personal to really go on and on about. I hope you kinda get the idea about who I really am. I am genuine. I'm honest and open, totally dependable and crazy trustworthy.
I'm an adult now, at least that's what it seems like. I miss being young, I'm scared of getting older but I do want to be who I am meant to be. I was given some reason to be here and I'm going to use it.
When it comes to losing this weight, I'm not doing it for anyone or anything. I'm doing it for MYSELF. I need to get out of this fat suit I've been in all my life. I deserve to be thin for once and I'm determined to get there and maintain it forever. Kids are definitely not in the near future for me. I have way to much to do and see before I could think of settling down.
So thanks for taking the walk with me and learning a few things. For all who has been supporting me so far, I thank you. I enjoy your faith and I promise not to let anyone down. Not even myself. You'll see
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