Lets make this the MOST supportive forum!!!

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Korrie

Korrie

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Hey guys, THeres no doubt WLF is one of the BIGGEST forums out there! I'm so proud of the members of our forum! I know when I log on, I feel like I"m coming home! You guys are all so great!

BUT the newcomers section is the most neglected section of the forum, and thats too bad! We have so many wonderful people visiting our site and I don't feel like they're getting the welcome they deserve!

I know it takes effort sometimes to sit there and welcome people to the forum, but try to remember what it was like for you just joining up. You all know the old saying "treat others like you would want to be treated".

So lets all step up our game, welcome those newcomers and make WLF....

:grouphug:THE MOST SUPPORTIVE FORUM ON THE NET!!!:grouphug:​
 
I think its easy to forget about the newcomers because of the layout of the forum. There are so many sections. It's a mistake a lot of forums make.

The fewer sections in a forum the better. Also the fewer stickies the better. Maybe all the stickies could go in their own section and not clog up the threads pages.

I'd like to see some of the sections amalgamated so its not so tedious to check in to each one and see if there are new posts. As the weight loss diaries is the most popular branch, i reckon the newcomers branch needs to be located right above it so that newcomers can see the weight loss diary.

I say this because it took me a while to find the diary section and it certainly wasn't visible the first time I came to the forum. Because on the top section showed up.

There's just too much to look around at when you are new to this forum. I'm a regular on at least one very busy forum and on one that has many sections, I have no need to visit the other sections because the topics are right out of my field of need most times and its the same for everyone else but on this forum, i think all sections are relevant to almost of all us most of the time. That's why it should be easy to see what's going on at a glance.

I also wish that new posts stayed bold until i had read them. Can this not be done. The time period is really too short and in fact you might as well not have it because if you don't read it and leave hte page, next time you come back its not bold any more so then you don't know what you've read or not.
 
I'd like to see some of the sections amalgamated so its not so tedious to check in to each one and see if there are new posts.
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You realise there's a 'new posts' tab at the top that shows you every thread that has had a new post added since you last visited, right?

I just wanna add that I'm pretty happy with how the forum is laid out. The only thing I'd change is to tone down some of the preaching that's been going on lately: it's getting a little irritating ;)

PS Korrie, you're right, we don't welcome people whole heartedly enough! I'll try my best to post more often in newcomers.
 
@fortyfour

Of the many forums that I've been a part of and researched to find a good layout for this forum, it's actually one of the better ones. We have created a couple extra forums, like Cohen's because of the popularity, but if you can't find the "diary" section, than you probably weren't looking that hard. If you had ever clicked on the "new posts", you would have found it immediately, since it is probably the busiest forum. (which also is a response to your "bold" question).

Moving the stickies one place would completely defeat the purpose as they are only relavent to the forum in which they are placed. if they were all located in one place, that whole forum would be ignored by most people. Maybe some of the stickies could be removed, as many probably haven't been reviewed in a long time, but that's pretty minor.
 
I really like the layout of this forum and find it pretty easy to navigate.

I to, think it is important to welcome the new people. If we don't respond to their posts they think that it is a slow forum and then leave becuase there is no interaction.

I agree with Holly88 - the preachyness is getting a little annoying on some of the posts.

Over, as a new member I am pretty happy with this forum, and I hope to get to know all of you a lot better though it as I work towards my goals!
 
I also agree there should be more responses to the newcomers, although I no longer post much outside of the diary section as it not worth the effort to argue with some of the "know it alls".
 
Hi Korrie, thanks for putting that out there. I just wanted to say that this forum is awesome and I'm so excited to have found it so a big thank you to all those that make it possible.
 
Can't really do much about the people who are just here to debate. It's tiresome but nothing can really be done about that. I also think it's a bit much when I see that there are 100 views for a thread with no replies...ouch.

I'm guilty as far as welcoming new members. I used to welcome almost all of them and now it seems that I've only been welcoming a few. I must change that.

But other than that I think this forum is great. I've gotten and given so much motivation. I have to credit it for a lot of my progress. It's also a great place to feel like I'm not alone. I no longer feel like I'm the only person who feels this way or that way about my weight. I'm so glad I found it.
 
Guilty as charged to the know -it-all tag. I can't be quite as minimal in my comments as many of you. I find it hard to overlook some obviously dubious advice when there is so much good advice available if you know where to look. I don't mean to offend people when i offer advice. I am not offended when people offer me advice. If I don't agree with it, i carry on doing what i've decided is the right course.

Also i find it hard to not offer basic sensible advice that i think would be really helpful to many people. I didn't make what i say up from thin air. I get it from reputable sources such as the CSIRO Total Well Being diet book which is prepared by government nutritionists who did scientific studies on their diet before publishing their book. I use wikipedia when i need a bit of clarification on issues i'm foggy on to check my facts. And i use other sources that seem to be credible. I cross check my information. I usually don't use fitness websites or diet websites such as weight watchers or jenny craig and the like.

Why do you need to argue at all with a know it all. Maybe you should consider what's being suggested.

You can voice your disagreement and state your case if you have the energy and you think its important enough. I tend to think its important enough when i disagree with someone and present my point of view, otherwise i also don't bother to contradict someone I disagree with.

Holly referred to the Mayo clinic once or twice. I don't know anything about them but i've heard the name and believe they are also a credible source.

I think the fitness and diet gurus as mentioned above, get things a little screwy. These are the people we have to thank for fad diets and expensive exercise equipment that everyone gets bored with after a few months and also perhaps other crazy things like drinking water constantly.
 
The new posts lists is not a complete list. Right now its only showing two posts i haven't read. I know that's not true. The weightloss diary forum is full of posts i haven't read since i lasted opened those threads.
 
Korrie said:
Hey guys, THeres no doubt WLF is one of the BIGGEST forums out there! I'm so proud of the members of our forum! I know when I log on, I feel like I"m coming home! You guys are all so great!

BUT the newcomers section is the most neglected section of the forum, and thats too bad! We have so many wonderful people visiting our site and I don't feel like they're getting the welcome they deserve!

I know it takes effort sometimes to sit there and welcome people to the forum, but try to remember what it was like for you just joining up. You all know the old saying "treat others like you would want to be treated".

So lets all step up our game, welcome those newcomers and make WLF....

:grouphug:THE MOST SUPPORTIVE FORUM ON THE NET!!!:grouphug:​
Click to expand...

The biggest issue with the newcomer's section (from my perspective) is that a lot of the newcomer's don't really invite the help and support they are offered. Sure, their initial post may indicate that they are wanting help in the form of advice, information or support, but hardly ever (once again, from my perspective) do those members ever follow up with the 'senior' members that take the time to lend a helping hand. Either that, or they just ignore the advice they are given. And, to me, that's offputting.

If someone asks for advice, they should welcome any words of wisdom that come their way. Sure, you can disagee with the advice you are given and have a conversation about it, but, to me, it seems that a lot of the newcomer's are only looking for specific advice - advice that they want to hear.

For instance, a lot of the younger crowd that comes through here (a lot, not all) seems to be looking for some sort of superficial pat on the back. I see a lot of "Wah, wah, I'm so fat and ugly, look how gross I am" kind of posts from people who list their stats as being 5' 6" 145 lbs. And, when I see that (and this probably seems awful of me), I don't see a person with a weight problem - I see a person who is looking for attention - a person that needs an ego boost.

Once you offer those people honest advice and tell them that they're not fat, they don't listen - they just continue with their whining - until someone on the forum kneels down and lends them sympathy and/or that superficial pat on the back that they're looking for. THEN they respond.

Paraphrase of a common post:

"Hi y'all. I'm a 16 year old girl and am a sophomore in high school. I'm 5' 6" and I weigh 145 lbs, BLAH. Gross, huh? I'm just sick and tired of being fat and ugly and I need to lose weight. I have this huuuuuge fat roll hanging over my jeans and my muffin top is like OMG gross to the max!!! I can't stand my disgusting body anymore and I need to get skinny. I started a diet this week but I want to know what the best way for me to lose weight is. Right now, I'm eating about 800 calories a day. I know that's not enough, but I NEED to lose weight. I need to trim down so I can look good in a bathing suit. I'm tired of being so gross and fat :(

Help me!!! Any advice would appreciated."

Advice they get:

"You're in high school, so your body is going through a lot of changes. Like it or not, there's not much you can do about it. Don't pay attention to what people are saying about you and don't feel bad about the way you look. You're normal in height and normal in weight, so don't think that you have a weight problem. If you want to tone up, do some excercise. But, you don't really need to lose weight, so there's no need for you to go on a diet. Also, 800 calories a day is not nearly enough. You have to start eating more or else you're going to get sick and do damage to your body. Anyway, good luck!"

Their response:

"..." (nothing)

Advice they want:

"Oh my God, honey, you are so beautiful. Look at you, you're gorgeous. You are incredibly beautiful and you have nothing to worry about."

Their response:

"AWWWWW, thank you sooooo much. I needed that!!! Thank you soooo much!!! I am so grateful for your kind words. Bless your heart!!!"

And that is the number one reason why I find it hard to want to continuously post in the newcomer's section. A lot of people don't want to listen, unless someone is telling them what they want to hear. A lot of people take any words that they disagree with as an attack, as if you 'don't understand' or as if you're being insensitive and unnecessarily mean.

So, I usually find myself putting the newcomer's section in the back of my mind, because I just think to myself, "...what's the point?"

I know that not ALL newcomer's are like that, but I've seen it enough to where I've been offput by the section (for the most part).

Korrie said:
I hear ya! We've had people complain before about "know it alls" but I think theres little to nothing we can do about it.
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HAHAHA, I'm willing to bet that a lot of those complaints were about me.

fortyfour said:
The new posts lists is not a complete list. Right now its only showing two posts i haven't read. I know that's not true. The weightloss diary forum is full of posts i haven't read since i lasted opened those threads.
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You can subscribe to the threads you are interested in. Then, everytime a new post is made, it will show up in your user CP under "New Subscribed Threads." The thread that contains the most recent post shows up on the top and then the list continues down from there.

As far as I know, every single new post from every single thread on the entire forum (in every individual section) can't be seen on a list - only the threads in which you are subscribed.
 
ChefChiTown said:
HAHAHA, I'm willing to bet that a lot of those complaints were about me.
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No, I don't think anyones called you a "know it all" Typical complaints we get are words like "harsh" "insensitive" "offensive" ect. lol :)

While your post was entertaining, I'm not sure its accurate. I don't think the great majority of our newbies are 16yr olds looking to have their egos stroked.
 
BTW...theres been quiet an increase in posting in the newcomers section...THANK YOU WLF!!! Keep up the good work! :party:
 
Korrie said:
No, I don't think anyones called you a "know it all" Typical complaints we get are words like "harsh" "insensitive" "offensive" ect. lol :)
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Harsh? Insensitive? Offensive? Who me? :blush5:

Korrie said:
While your post was entertaining, I'm not sure its accurate. I don't think the great majority of our newbies are 16yr olds looking to have their egos stroked.
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That's why I said that's how it seems to me, from my perspective. I try to post in the newcomer's section every once in a while (because I know that not all newbies are like that), but once I come across a thread or two that is created by some teenager that seems to just want a pat on the back, I lose interest for a while. That's me though. I'm not saying everybody else is like that.
 
I find it worthwhile responding to the young things who haven't really got a weight problem. These are probably the kids who will end up with weight problems when they get older. Ok so they don't need to be on a diet but they can lose a bit of weight to make themselves feel better and its not hard to maximise good dietary advice. Most of this kids who haven't got a weight problem YET, are eating a lot of junk food. I just responded to one of these kids the other day. She admitted as much. She's a contender for diabetes and heart disease down the track due to her body shape, so i think its well worth giving them some good diet advice now. Yes she did admit that she knows she should give up the fatty food but that has to be replaced with something. Might as well tell them what and how.

I started my current diet when i was just a tad above my healthy weight range and yes i was flabby and felt i looked pretty ugly. Its amazing how much difference the loss of a few kilos can make. So the healthy weight range is quite generous.

So when push comes to shove, i think we are all pretty much the same and it comes down to a matter of perspective.

I certainly try to keep a way from telling someone who seems to be chasing compliments and who is already looking pretty good and healthy, how gorgeous they are and i don't think anyone should either. I saw one of those from a regular.

At the same time i can understand how incomprehensible and annoying it might be for someone who has a serious weight problem to have to respond to a girl of this kind. In that case, i would just suggest not responding if you don't have the sort of advice they are looking for.
 
fortyfour said:
I find it worthwhile responding to the young things who haven't really got a weight problem. These are probably the kids who will end up with weight problems when they get older. Ok so they don't need to be on a diet but they can lose a bit of weight to make themselves feel better and its not hard to maximise good dietary advice. Most of this kids who haven't got a weight problem YET, are eating a lot of junk food. I just responded to one of these kids the other day. She admitted as much. She's a contender for diabetes and heart disease down the track due to her body shape, so i think its well worth giving them some good diet advice now. Yes she did admit that she knows she should give up the fatty food but that has to be replaced with something. Might as well tell them what and how.

I started my current diet when i was just a tad above my healthy weight range and yes i was flabby and felt i looked pretty ugly. Its amazing how much difference the loss of a few kilos can make. So the healthy weight range is quite generous.

So when push comes to shove, i think we are all pretty much the same and it comes down to a matter of perspective.

I certainly try to keep a way from telling someone who seems to be chasing compliments and who is already looking pretty good and healthy, how gorgeous they are and i don't think anyone should either. I saw one of those from a regular.

At the same time i can understand how incomprehensible and annoying it might be for someone who has a serious weight problem to have to respond to a girl of this kind. In that case, i would just suggest not responding if you don't have the sort of advice they are looking for.
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The kind of people I was referencing were people that were blatantly (and obviously) looking for attention. I see a lot of them on this forum, especially in the Summer. And, it annoys the crap out of me when people sign up for a weight loss forum and don't have a weight problem of their own. So, when I see a newcomer that is clearly not overweight make a thread about how fat and gross they are, it turns me off.

And, I know that not every single newcomer is like that. Many are in need of genuine help with an honest weight problem. I'm not including those people in my little rant - only the ones who are OBVIOUSLY just on here looking for compliments.
 
Surprisingly enough, the people who complain about 'harsh' and 'insensitive' comments are those that simply don't get the answer that they want. Like those that are being told that weight loss pills don't work, and they get all huffy about it. Or those that are being told that doing things a certain way isn't really the best way to do it.

I don't post in the newcomer's section pretty much ever. For several reasons - 80% of the posts are something like 'Hello, I'm new here.'. What the heck am I supposed to say to that?

Then there are those posts that Chef mentioned, which I am rather allergic to, and which put me off going any further. Takes all my willpower not to start ranting right then and there.

Then there are the posts of people that brag about how they've lost all the weight already, and are just there to help, followed by either spam, or a lot of stuff that is already in the stickies, and not worth reposting. I feel like telling those people to take 5 minutes and read before posting the same stuff over and over again, but I'm trying to be nice, so I don't say anything.

In addition to all that, I simply don't have the time. There are a few threads I will reply to, but most of my time spent on this board is checking for and removing spam, and reading a couple of posts.

If people have the time and patience to answer every post, that's great, keep it up and thanks for the good work. I just simply don't.

And that concludes the rant about why I never answer posts in the newcomer's section.
 
I really like how knowledgable people are on forums. I was talking to some people recently in real life about proteins and how they repair damaged tissue and why they drink 1000 calorie protein shakes to get their intake rather than eating those calories. I am learning about all that stuff and finding it really interesting.

I too am very disturbed by the number of posts asking about how to 'get skinny' rather than 'get fit and healthy' and feel that skinny is not necessarily a healthy aspiration. Think that we should all be aware of this and promote healthy behaviours and attitudes in our responses.
 
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