Trying to bulk up father's dog. Suggestions?

B

Badmotorfinger

0
The title pretty much says it all. You all have probably seen Bob's dog believe it or not. It's a female Airdale Terrier(large black/brown dog) Anyways, Enron was the star in a dog food commercial for some company i never heard, like Eureka dog food or something. The dog smells like a toilet, and is the cause for my 'cautious diet' but i won't get into that now. The point is that she is a lame dog, but it has a good frame, size and potential. I want it to intimidate everyone who sees her, to bulge with muscles, and to become the most superior dog ever. I've been feeding her cheerios, dog food, as well as soy powder(which she loves alot). Advice?
 
umm...

full body weight training??

btw, i'm not intimidated by any dog that can't front squat at least 250
 
I was thinking of putting those ankle weights on the dog, and then making the dog fetch a ball. When winter arrives maybe i can have it tow some weights on a metal garbage can lid? What do you guys think of that?
 
Lol, I don't know about weights, but my dog is getting kinda fat. I'm thinking of feeding her several times a day, instead of one.
 
Badmotorfinger said:
The title pretty much says it all. You all have probably seen Bob's dog believe it or not. It's a female Airdale Terrier(large black/brown dog) Anyways, Enron was the star in a dog food commercial for some company i never heard, like Eureka dog food or something. The dog smells like a toilet, and is the cause for my 'cautious diet' but i won't get into that now. The point is that she is a lame dog, but it has a good frame, size and potential. I want it to intimidate everyone who sees her, to bulge with muscles, and to become the most superior dog ever. I've been feeding her cheerios, dog food, as well as soy powder(which she loves alot). Advice?
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Are you serious?? :eek:
 
Of course i'm seroius, dogs have feelings too. I'm sure it wants to work out and have a body that it can be proud of. I always see her get all hyper when i walk past her because she wants a work out. Think about that book "call of the wild" and how the sled dogs took pride in their strength and hard work. I'm merely suggesting that Enron work out to become a model, not a work animal. Think of how many more awards she can win in the dog shows. She's already won 4 ribbons out of the 5 shows she competed in, alot of them 1st-3rd place.
 
Like I said, it’s my 'alleged' father’s dog, and I wouldn't own any animal because they are dirty. I didn't want to mention this and I hope I don't make any of you puke when I explain the other reason I want the dog become ripped. If the dog is muscular I think Bob will stop having sex with it. This is no joke, I’ve never seen them having sex, but I have many phone recordings with highly suggestive dialogue. In addition he always takes the dog to his room, and locks his door and there is always a lot of noise in that room (tv and various other noises) The dog also got pregnant and bob told me "I don’t understand how this happened, I only took her to 1 show and the dog reunion party and I was with her both times"(no other animals in our house, dog is supervised when she goes to the bathroom) Now I’ve heard different species cant have sex and produce offspring; this is probably why the dog had a miscarriage! He took the dog to the vet, and he explained about the dog being pregnant and then losing its baby.... Did I mention that the dog gets overly excited every time it sees Bob and got especially excited one day when I took my shirt off in the kitchen after a hard work out. I wasn’t going to test what she would have done if I decided to lose the pants… oh god…
 
I think this is foreshadowing that BadMotor is going to engage in illicit activities with this animal or it's an allusion to a younger sibling in his house is being taken advantage of by a step-parent.

Either way...I suggest men in badges or straight jackets.
 
i think you need to work on your self image or whatever, if you feel that you will appear intimidating through your dog i just feel sad for the dog, no animal should have insane owners treat a dog good and it will be your best friend
 
Did i mention the sex toys? An approximately 10 inch long bannana was found laying on the mail table by the door.... The owner is gross/unstable, he looks at some messed up porn, ive seen the cookies. Male strippers gone wild, brutality(chicks that are all sore and bleeding),interracial,british porn etc... And im not going to deal with the hassel of calling the cops because there is a dog porker living in my house. Anyways, i just want the dog to be cool, and what better way than to look ripped like me. This is no allusion, i'm a smart but straightfoward man. Lets stay on topic and provide work out suggestions and routines for this beast...
 
Nobody cares about what you think derwyddon. As for the techniques, ive heard about people who train their dogs to fight and use dog treadmills, i supposed i could water down this idea and make it more suitable for a beginner... Any other suggestions?
 
I dont think you should be doing anything to the dog. Maybe you should give it to someone that will actually care for it. Why dont you just take it for walks and jogs like other dog owners do for their dogs health.

Yo are one sick mofo by the way.
 
I would use a fullbody routine. Something like this:

Monday

Sand or Snow sled drags - 3x150 yards
Weighted vest stair climbs - 3x4 flights
Cable rollovers - 3x10 (tie to cables from a machine to it's left hind and fore leg then het him to roll over, then swap sides)

Tuesday off

Wednesday

Grass incline sled drags 10x30 yards
Trikey pulls 10x30 metres (pulling you on a tricycles with a rope between it's teeth)
Hoop jumps with weighted vest - 3x10kg

Thursday off

Friday

Incline beach or snow sprints 4x100metres
Weighted Frisbee jumps 10x5kg
Weighted tail wags


Saturday off

Sunday off
 
WTF???

1. How are you allowed to own a dog?
2. How are you creepy enough to suggest any type of animal sex is going on?
3. What kind of name is "Enron"?
4. .... just wierd.
5. Why would anyone provide a serious response to this??
 
Lmao

this guy is f##ked up,i think the best thing to do would be to let the dog go
people like you should be effing locked up. i wouldnt be surprised if it was you giving the dog some sweet loving
how the hell can you seriously consider training your dog! thats unthinkable, u have got to be having a laugh cos if this is real you should locked up no question. how would you know if this dog wants to looked ripped or wants to train???!
 
Derwyddon said:
You're not even going to start with me with how disgusting I think you are.
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Your commentary supports your signature Derwyddon. It's no wonder you want to become stronger physically and mentally. The mental aspect is a lost cause for you though. Thanks Riki that routine is awesome, although the resistance rollovers might put too much strain on her legs joints. The trikey pull is great, my old deceased dog did that for me when i was 6. I have pictures, i can't believe that technique didn't come to mind.
 
Hes not really being serious. All his posts are always BS if you actually take a good look at him. Who in their right mind has a headshot taken of them and puts it on a forum. He says stupid things. Hes just trying to piss everyone off for some reason.
 
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