It wasn't an easy journey and its not over yet. The biggest thing I had to do was really go back over my life and see what kind of resentments I held onto and how they affected the way I thought and reacted. The next step was looking at all that crap and try to turn it around. If so & so did this to me and I have been angry for years about it, how can I wrap my own head around it and see where that person was at that moment in time. I mean, how can I forgive it, or see what my part was in the situation.That is so great and gives me hope to one day get there. The undercurrent of dread is something I relate to well so it's really nice to hear you in such a positive mind-state. Sounds like you've done a helluva lot of work along the way so I'm glad to hear you've reached a really good place.