LaMa

liza

Well-known member
don´t want to go hiking away from reliable toilets so I´ll go shopping for kitchen supplies instead. I could do with another casserole dish and maybe a replacement for my older, more beat-up storage containers. That should give me at least an hour of walking anyway, which will just have to do.
That sounds like a good alternative. Hope it's a fun little shopping trip :)

Getting a little more stable on the board already
very cool--i really like that idea--I feel like I should work on something like that--build up a good strong sense of balance--it seems to be one of those things that really vanishes as people get older and I'd like to be building that up while still young enough.
 

Emilyrose

Well-known member
Is there a reason you don't want to go on the pill again, just wondering...

I think if you have limited energy tomorrow, just do the best you can for the day that's in it. That's enough. :) Higher energy days are just around the bend.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Hormones *sigh* :svengo: I don't miss them one bit. Hope Sunday feels better, LaMa :grouphug:
:grouphug: Thank you. I started out feeling crappy again but I went for a 3 km morning walk regardless and had some breakfast and now I´m at least feeling more positive - even if not more motivated.
That sounds like a good alternative. Hope it's a fun little shopping trip :)
Thanks :grouphug: The walk was nice but the shopping was frustrating. I almost felt guilty for wasting the shop assistant´s time! They tried so hard to sell me a modern-but-fugly stainless steel thing with a silicone and glass lid for over 100€ when all I was looking for was a basic glass double casserole dish (one of the ones that´s basically a deeper dish with a shallower one for a lid?) which I´m sure I´ve seen for under 15€. My mom has at least five of them and has had them for over 40 years. May check Caritas for a used one tomorrow.
I feel like I should work on something like that--build up a good strong sense of balance--it seems to be one of those things that really vanishes as people get older and I'd like to be building that up while still young enough.
Balance is so important! The least glamorous (but perfectly functional) version would just be to try standing on one leg for 20 seconds at a time. As long as you´re staring a fixed point you´re really training ankle stability rather than balance but we´ve got to start somewhere. From there you try standing on one leg while continuously looking from left to right. Next step: close your eyes. Then stand on a soft carpet or a yoga mat. With closed eyes. If you can do that you´re probably ok for all day-to-day activities but you could make it even more challenging by either doubling/tripling your mat (just fold it, you don´t need multiples) or for the real freaks you can try getting up on tip-toe while standing on one leg with your eyes closed. No way I can do that unless I´m barefoot on a hard surface!
Is there a reason you don't want to go on the pill again, just wondering...
Probably nonsense. My mom was very anti-pill and I guess I internalized some of that? I was happy enough with my IUD. It just feels wrong to put meds into my body for something that´s no more than an annoyance*. Plus all my female relatives tend to react to the pill with pretty significant weight gain and I´m not having that.
I think if you have limited energy tomorrow, just do the best you can for the day that's in it. That's enough. :) Higher energy days are just around the bend.
Thank you for reminding me :grouphug:

I don´t want today to feel like a wasted day but I really don´t feel like doing anything either. Could do some extra chores as an alibi. Will try to stick to three meals and a snack.

* You know what popped into my head just now? Eve and the apple. Like taking the pill is cheating God out of your punishment? WTF... Nobody´s ever told me that directly and I´ve been an atheist for over twenty years yet random crap like that still worms its way into my life sometimes :rotflmao: / :banghead:
 

Marsia

Well-known member
Hi LaMa, so sorry your period is all out of whack. That really stinks. I used to do non-inverted yoga poses to help with cramps, and it was really effective for me. It's so funny how those old Judeo-Christian symbols stick around in secular culture and still can haunt us. Puritanism runs deep in my family, and I still get those type of messages popping up in my thoughts at weird random times. I just have to laugh at how pernicious some self defeating thoughts are, because laughter does tend to dispel that sort of crap!
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
It´s weird how these things can just lie there unnoticed for decades and secretly influence me! No cramps yet, thankfully. Just the leaden, exhausted feeling. Like everything´s futile. But I think I did reasonably well today: I walked for a total of 2 hours (split into multiple short walks) and spent a good bit of time on the wahu board while watching Youtube. I did eat more icecream than planned but given that the whole thing is 430 g and I ate at least 170 g before today (not sure how much I had on Friday but it was at least 50 g) it really wasn´t terrible. Especially since I had it in three portions (one for a mid-morning snack and the other two for dessert after lunch and dinner) rather than in one sitting.

So, plan for tomorrow:
- Short run plus two shoulder exercises (actually I could do that at work: I´m in the exercise room again)
- Pasta/shrimp/veg
- Maybe a half-baguette
- Kidney bean mash wraps
 

Emilyrose

Well-known member
Hi LaMa, so sorry your period is all out of whack. That really stinks. I used to do non-inverted yoga poses to help with cramps, and it was really effective for me. It's so funny how those old Judeo-Christian symbols stick around in secular culture and still can haunt us. Puritanism runs deep in my family, and I still get those type of messages popping up in my thoughts at weird random times. I just have to laugh at how pernicious some self defeating thoughts are, because laughter does tend to dispel that sort of crap!
I mean, I guess you're swapping Judeo-Christian symbols for non-inverted yoga poses? Sorry, but sometimes the New Age rubbish really annoys me. It's one false god replaced by another.

Hope your Monday was good, LaMa. Mine wasn't, clearly.
 

Marsia

Well-known member
I mean, I guess you're swapping Judeo-Christian symbols for non-inverted yoga poses? Sorry, but sometimes the New Age rubbish really annoys me. It's one false god replaced by another.
If you're going to criticize me, please just do that in my journal. I don't want to reply to you on LaMa's journal. Not into drama.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
I´m sorry your Monday sucked Em. Mine did too. And Tuesday too, to be honest. Please try not to let it out on other people though; Marsia didn´t deserve that.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
So... I don´t want to be here. I feel like I could just sit here and stare into nothingness until the sky falls. I feel like I ought to be able to yank myself up by my bootstraps and just...

DO BETTER.

FEEL BETTER.

Or I could sit down and cry. That works. God I´m glad I don´t have an early shift tomorrow morning.

Periods suck. And I know that´s all it is but it doesn´t make it better. I should probably go for a walk. Gotta call Dad at 7 pm and I can´t be a mess when I do.
 

Marsia

Well-known member
:grouphug: So sorry you are feeling so yuck. That's so unfair the horrible periods are coming early, too. I hope you find something soothing and that you can have a nice visit with your dad. More hugs!!!
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Thanks hon :grouphug: I'm taking all the hugs today. At least I know things will get better again soon. Just gotta hang on.
 

Floater

Well-known member
You are pushing yourself already. I'm sure it took a lot of work to get to this point. Look what you have; a career; relationships with friends and family; you have taken years and years to build your body and to learn about it and bodies of others to the point that you are qualified to help them rebuild their injuries and other ailments.

The first time I encountered the idea of pulling oneself up from one's bootstraps was in an illustrated copy of "Baron Muchhausen's Stories". He was riding a horse to battle, the horse fell into a bog, so the fictional Baron grabbed himself by his own hair and as the horse wouldn't lift, he straddled it really hard and it got lifted too by the stirrups. In the story, he made it to dry land and fought and fucked to his heart's content, but we are mere real humans and we abide by the laws of physics, and chemistry, and... Time.

Bodies tick tock at their own pace. Calories in calories out, exercise hours and miles walked are all good ROUGH metrics, but you are allowed to take a day off or a week off. A funny story: when I had that god awful muscle spasm a few weeks ago, and the doctor told me to "keep going to the gym" when it's been months, at first I felt SHAME. I AM NOT ATHLETIC, I LOOK LIKE A BARREL OF TITS, HE MAKES FUN OF ME. And then I realized: he was actually telling me to keep up a good habit. Which he didn't know I had. He felt my back and could tell I weight train.

@LaMaria I'm so sure that if you were to visit any other professional in the field of science based, uh, body stuff, like a nutritionist, maybe and endo, what the fucking ever, they would tell you that you are doing your best and your best is enough. Like, more than enough. I would really love to go for a hike in the Alps with you; I'm no mountaineer but why should I be? The slopes are pretty enough. The peaks are for people who have stuff to show.

Mweheeh what a cheesy metaphor.

Have I ever shared this song with you? Or in the forum, in general? Sorry if I have; but it just speaks to the melancholy between dream and having to adapt to society. Feel free to delete the whole post if this is not what you needed.

Take care <3
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Thank you, Floater, that was a beautiful and very helpful post :grouphug: I don't know if you'd posted this song before but I'm listening to it for the first time and it's making me cry 🙈Which is a marker of quality in songs like that.
Also: I'd love to show you around the Wienerwald! Let's see if the future will make that possible at some point :)
@LaMaria One more hug, just because :grouphug:
Thank you :grouphug:

I'm still tired and I'd love to keep eating icecream. Will try and dream up some delicious healthy food to bring to work instead. I want my energy back and junkfood won't give it to me. Maybe I can do a large salad for lunch? With greens, fruit, and... what can we toss in for protein? Ham. Just get some cheap, light ham and cube it up. Dinner could be the rest of the pea mash wrapped up but then I'd have to make something else for work breakfast tomorrow and I kind of don't want to. Oh wait: I could do another fruit/greens/ham salad for brekkie. Ok: better go defrost some mango right now so it'll be thawed by lunchtime. BRB.
 

LaMaria

Well-known member
Got up, weighed out two portions of mango (one´s slowly defrosting in the fridge for tomorrow), went to the store for ham, made that salad (chopped up a marinated egg as well), and wrapped those wraps for dinner. Sadly I also picked up a sixpack of small pastries at the store and ate all of them. Oh well.
 

liza

Well-known member
Hi LaMa,
Sorry you've been having some rough time with your period. Good for you for continually trying to stay on track no matter how challenging. At least if you are having a bit more junk food you are balancing that with healthy foods so that's good!
Speaking of balancing-- I tried out those exercise you mentioned a few posts back-could balance fine eyes closed on one foot--didn't try the soft carpet one but I feel very steady on normal floors. We used to do a lot of that sort of thing in yoga and a bit in qi gong..
 

Cate

Support crew
You still have a balance at the moment with your food, LaMa. It could have been so much worse. Were the pastries delicious?
 
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